The Confused Dot Com Moments in Life!

[Supernatural]

Throughout your lives, have you had moments where you reacted with: "I'm confused dot com???"

My most confusing one was surprisingly recent. Around March this year, I received an email from my niece-in-law. She stated that her and hubby were in the middle of a divorce. She pointed out that her and their three boys were okay and not to worry.

Last month out of the blue, I began receiving vicious and very rude emails from my nephew. I kept my cool, stayed in control and was polite to the end. Thankfully!

Now, here's my "Confused Dot Com" moment. Nephew stated clearly (but never said anything about it) that there was no divorce and that he'd die for his wife and children. Stupidly pointing out that I would bitterly regret getting in touch with his kids.

Firstly, I've never met any of them and secondly I wouldn't do that unless I had them introduced to me by their parents. Crazy!

So, I'm confused about this. However, knowing things that happened in the past, I'm not surprised he would react that way. Still why would someone say they're going through a divorce and the other denying... I guess the only conclusion I can come up with....

His state of mind is worse than we originally believed.

Now, your turn. What's your confused moment(s)?

 

[Beezer]

Hmm...

There seems to be red flags all over this post. Your niece-in-law confirms her and her children's safety. The husband says he'd die for his family. One says they are getting divorced...the other says no. Husband tells you that you would bitterly regret getting in touch with his kids.

The husband sounds a little unhinged to me. Hope nothing bad comes of this situation.

 

[Jeni]

sounds like some disconnect but a likely scenario ........
niece in law may have said you know about the divorce and want to know kids are OK .......... maybe she led him to believe OR he was mistaken that you contacted her instead of HER telling you..... sounds like a miscommunication of some sort.

 

[Naturally]

You mentioned they are niece-in-law and nephew ...
Can you contact your brother/sister for the straight skinny?

 

[caroln]

I'm confused as to why you were contacted in the first place. You said you have never even met their children, so it seems you aren't that close to begin with.

 

[Jules]

Your nephew seems rather unstable. The suggestion to contact his parents is a good one. Or someone close to the family that clarify things. Maybe she’s already moved out and has the kids someone else. JMO, I’d be afraid for the safety of the wife and kids.

 

[PeppermintPatty]

I’d say the niece in law is contacting as many friends and relatives as she can to protect herself and her family. It doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship but we can only speculate or guess , just like you.

 

[Supernatural]

Hmm...

There seems to be red flags all over this post. Your niece-in-law confirms her and her children's safety. The husband says he'd die for his family. One says they are getting divorced...the other says no. Husband tells you that you would bitterly regret getting in touch with his kids.

The husband sounds a little unhinged to me. Hope nothing bad comes of this situation.

Unhinged is the correct word. This one and only nephew of mine was born suffering from Foetal Alcohol Syndrome. He was in a bad shape.

As his Godmother, I'd been (unbeknownst to me) given a lifetime of babysitting free of charge. Very nice parents he had, indeed! I'm the one who discovered, thanks to all my medical books reading years, that the wee tube between his stomach and intestines was blocked.

Something that has happened to all the first born male in our family for generations.

At 2 months old, he had to receive emergency life surgery. So, thanks to me, he's alive today in his 40s now. That's gratitude for you isn't it.

I'm concerned but unfortunately, I've no contacts around where he lives to have someone checking up on them. I know, as she told me, she's moved out and moved in with her parents and a restraining order in place.

But, the sensitive part of me worries and I'm not ashamed to say that I bitterly regret taking him to hospital. If only I'd known the future back then...

Nevertheless, I believe my niece-in-law, discovered the crooked plot with family legal papers as well as no longer wanting to put up with his temper and alcoholism. That's one future I wished wouldn't happen but sadly it did.

Now that I know he has access to all her emails and probably Skype as well, I'm staying away and the only good thing I can do is ... Pray!

Thanks @Beezer

 

[Supernatural]

You mentioned they are niece-in-law and nephew ...
Can you contact your brother/sister for the straight skinny?

Nope dear, brother-in-law died in 2006 after divorcing in 2001. He had also remarried and I know nothing of that family. Sister died circa 2021 of advanced liver cirrhosis, lifelong alcoholic which began in secrets around age 5 in the 1950s.

She drank nonstop like a camel gone dry during the whole nine months. Put it that way she never stopped, except on the days she went to doctors for monthly pregnancy check ups. It was sad but no matter how we tried, she still drank over 40 ounced daily.

 

[Supernatural]

I'm confused as to why you were contacted in the first place. You said you have never even met their children, so it seems you aren't that close to begin with.

Niece-in-law found me through a Genealogy forum at the time my brother-in-law's death, around 2006-2007. We managed to speak on the phone from her workplace. At the time she'd said it was safer. So, further communications were always online. Nephew and niece-in-law married the following year, when nephew received his father's company pension. I've always hoped they would come and visit.

Due to sibling's alcoholism, I last saw any of them around 1995. Sorry, I had a tough childhood.

 

[Supernatural]

I’d say the niece in law is contacting as many friends and relatives as she can to protect herself and her family. It doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship but we can only speculate or guess , just like you.

When we did speak on the phone, she said that I was the complete opposite of her mother-in-law aka my sibling and asked if she could stay in touch, I agreed and of course, I do worry...

 

[PeppermintPatty]

When we did speak on the phone, she said that I was the complete opposite of her mother-in-law aka my sibling and asked if she could stay in touch, I agreed and of course, I do worry...

I’d worry also. Make sure to maintain boundaries and you should be fine.
In time she may prove to be an amazing relative. I wouldn’t be making any exact decisions right now.