The Older Sibling Delusion: "I Helped Mom Raise You"

Beezer

Beezer

Well-known Member
Does this ring a bell?

My older sister insists she spent a good part of her growing up years helping my mother raise her other 4 children. And yet I have no memory of this whatsoever. In fact, I can't even remember ONE time my sister helped out with our upbringing.
Now my 87 year old elderly Uncle is telling all of us that he spent a big part of his adult life raising his 5 nieces and nephews. Again, I have no memory at all of this.
Is this a common delusion among seniors? Because none of it is making sense to me.
 

Beezer said:
Does this ring a bell?

My older sister insists she spent a good part of her growing up years helping my mother raise her other 4 children. And yet I have no memory of this whatsoever. In fact, I can't even remember ONE time my sister helped out with our upbringing.
Now my 87 year old elderly Uncle is telling all of us that he spent a big part of his adult life raising his 5 nieces and nephews. Again, I have no memory at all of this.
Is this a common delusion among seniors? Because none of it is making sense to me.
Click to expand...
Not sure but it was common for the older siblings to look after the younger ones.
My older brothers were often told to watch after me when I was younger.
 
PeppermintPatty said:
Not sure but it was common for the older siblings to look after the younger ones.
Click to expand...
Yes. I understand that.

But my gut is telling me this is a whole bunch of revisionist hooey. I have no memory of my Uncle or Sister pitching in to help Mom raise all of us. I ran this by my younger sister today, and she is on the same page as me...practically did a 'spit take' when I mentioned it all.
 

I have seen it to be true where the eldest is changing, feeding, bathing younger ones, it does happen.
I also have seen where those siblings run to when they need something and it's not usually Mom.

I am the eldest and I was told to watch after my sisters outside but I didn't do the other Motherly things.
I ended up basically babysitting them in my teen years and that was no fun.
In my case I sure would not ever say I raised them.
 
I just remember taking Cabs everywhere with Mom when me and Sis were little...to the grocery store...dental appointments, etc. Mom didn't get her driver's license until she was 40 years old.
In grade 3 if Mom wasn't home for lunch, she'd give me 5 dollars to take my little sis across the road to the Plaza for a hot dog and fries at the local greasy spoon. That was a real treat for us two!

But I do find all of this bothersome. I just find it really disingenuous to state that my Mother received all of this extra help when we were younger...when it is simply not true at all. Mom was incredible and looked after the family and home pretty much all by herself while Pop worked 60 hours a week to put food on the table. Together, they made a great team!
 
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