Although we don't have any kids we have a wonderful Godson. He's 35 now, married with a son of his own. His father, a former very good friend of ours, decided that he didn't want kids after his son, his second child was born. Later the family found out that he had been having his evil way with a woman who had three children of her own.
The break up was messy and very painful. We took our Godson, his sister and their mother, away on holiday with us, always kept in touch, when the mother finally found love, my wife made her wedding dress.
The reason for regaling you with that is because I thought that my childhood was tough. My mother died, aged just 33, I was the oldest of four. My father did his best and I like to think that he produced four well rounded, sensible adults who have found their way in the world.
Many times I exchange feelings about my childhood with my Godson. When I think it through, although bereavement is an awful mental pain, and the fallout isn't easy, what I have that my Godson can never have, is closure. Cruel though it might sound, my mother is dead, she's not coming back. Whereas my Godson gets reminders all the time, when he does he either calls me or texts me. We have another question and answer session and he gets on with life.
I have never suffered the pain of divorce, nor marital deceit. We had lots of strong words but our love is robust. Hopefully it gives my Godson the example that relationships can survive. My thoughts are with you Holly, I do hope that you are able to enjoy Christmas.