What has surprised you the most about life?

I am surprised that I have done as well as I have with not having my parents since I was 9 years of age. I had 2 really good grandparents that raised me and made sure that I was raised properly in a Christian family. If I had been placed in an orphanage, I don't know where I would have ended up. I would hear my friends complain about their parents and that would sometimes bother me and I would begin to say something and then bite my tongue.
 

DebraMae said:
What do you mean?
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You said, DebraMae "Some say we will know when we die" & I replied "How does one "know" nothing?"

I meant when we die we go into a state of nothing, of non-existence. Thus, you can't know anything, there is no knowledge to impart to one that doesn't exist. So, we can't "know" anything if we don't exist. If one always believed in the afterlife and dies to nothingness we can't know anything when we die, whether wrong or right in one's living speculations.
 
Some say we will know when we die, but it doesn't matter what anyone says, because we don't know what happens when we die. No one does, but it would be nice if we would somehow live on in a state of bliss. However, just because it would be nice doesn't mean that's what happens. What we do know is that immediately upon death, our bodies stop repairing themselves, and our cells, including the ones in our brains, stop sending out the chemical and electrical signals that form our thoughts and memories, while they decay and return to their atomic parts. That is all we know. Beyond that, is there something else? No one knows. Believing what you don't know to be true, is called wishful thinking. It's comforting to be sure. Therefore, some make the claim that they actually know the answer to what may be the biggest mystery in life. But no one actually knows, let alone probably fully comprehends nothingness. We have experienced things ever since we were born, and it's almost impossible to imagine nothingness. Try to remember experiencing anything before you were conceived. That's our default state and it's not unreasonable to accept that this is what we return to when we die.
 

RadishRose said:
While playing outside as a child with my friends on a cloudy day, suddenly the sun came out. I was so disappointed, and that surprised me. I still don't understand.
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Maybe you're one of those fragile doves. If someone is going to completely change things from cloudy to sunny, from one mood to another, then you'd appreciate a little time to prepare. Some of us just don't like surprises...well intentioned or not ;)🤗
 
In the time and place where I grew up, men worked and women stayed home. I expected that my life would be like this, or that my husband and I would work together, e.g., in a family business.

I never dreamed about a career, money, travel, kids, or the things most people want. Most things I've done in life were just side trips or stopgaps while I waited for my real life to happen. It never did. I'm not sure why.

(I have been married, but unsuccessfully.)

So now I'm surprised to find that I've wasted my whole life on an impossible dream.
 
JustDave said:
Some say we will know when we die, but it doesn't matter what anyone says, because we don't know what happens when we die. No one does, but it would be nice if we would somehow live on in a state of bliss. However, just because it would be nice doesn't mean that's what happens. What we do know is that immediately upon death, our bodies stop repairing themselves, and our cells, including the ones in our brains, stop sending out the chemical and electrical signals that form our thoughts and memories, while they decay and return to their atomic parts. That is all we know. Beyond that, is there something else? No one knows. Believing what you don't know to be true, is called wishful thinking. It's comforting to be sure. Therefore, some make the claim that they actually know the answer to what may be the biggest mystery in life. But no one actually knows, let alone probably fully comprehends nothingness. We have experienced things ever since we were born, and it's almost impossible to imagine nothingness. Try to remember experiencing anything before you were conceived. That's our default state and it's not unreasonable to accept that this is what we return to when we die.
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Actually many people know what it's like to die.. then been resuscitated...
 
What has surprised me is how different we are from each other, and yet how much we are the same. Having tolerance is different than having acceptance and appreciation for our differences. No one can ever know what it is like to be another person. You can try to imagine, but ultimately we are each alone in our perceptions and experiences and values.
 
hollydolly said:
Actually many people know what it's like to die.. then been resuscitated...
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In near death experiences, the operative word is "near," meaning it's not death. Doctors may tell patients they died, but then were brought back to life, and that makes for a good conversation starter for the patient. But once a person dies, he's dead and cannot become alive, even if someone says he did. During near death experiences, oxygen to the brain stops. Impaired thinking and hallucinations follow. This is reported as what it is like when you're dead. If someone burried for a year in the ground is brought back to life and reports his adventures, then I'll be interested.
 
NorthernLight said:
In the time and place where I grew up, men worked and women stayed home. I expected that my life would be like this, or that my husband and I would work together, e.g., in a family business. I never dreamed about a career, money, travel, kids, or the things most people want. Most things I've done in life were just side trips or stopgaps while I waited for my real life to happen. It never did. I'm not sure why. (I have been married, but unsuccessfully.) So now I'm surprised to find that I've wasted my whole life on an impossible dream.
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Joni Mitchell you'll recall wrote the song "Both Sides Now" about life's illusions. It was sad and she said she really didn't know Life at all. But hidden in one line toward the end she said, "Well something's lost, but something's gained in living every day". I'm sure you've gained.

Your whole life has not been wasted. Think about it...career, travel, money, kids, and men are not all that life is about...thank goodness!...because those don't always turn out to be the best things in life for YOU...by far. Think back to the things you learned, the small things that brought you joy, etc. Maybe your "impossible dream" wasn't the best thing meant for you. I know you can rethink this and end up with a feeling of gratitude and relief that you didn't get that "impossible dream"...it could have been all wrong for you.
 
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fuzzybuddy said:
When I was 18, I feared losing my life. I was afraid of death. Now, I'm 76, and I intend to celebrate my second 100th birthday, but I don't fear death.
Others gave us life, and we used it, and we passed life on.
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Why would anyone fear death? We are all born to die.
 
JustDave said:
We have experienced things ever since we were born, and it's almost impossible to imagine nothingness. Try to remember experiencing anything before you were conceived. That's our default state and it's not unreasonable to accept that this is what we return to when we die.
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I view the nothingness as though death were a light that has been switched off.
 
WheatenLover said:
Mostly I think it is fear of the unknown, and fear of having a painful or otherwise difficult death. Or maybe they love life so much that they just want to stay alive. They are afraid they will die before they are ready to lose their lives.
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WheatenLover said:
I view the nothingness as though death were a light that has been switched off.
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I'm sure there are complex reasons for fearing death. When I was young, I went to funerals of loved ones, and saw them lying there in coffins lifeless, cold, gone, and soon to be buried. All the love they had shared and all the good they did was over, and all was gone forever. It seems like a bitter unavoidable pill to look forward to, and we cannot relate to no longer being alive because it is the only thing we have ever known. We believe we are too important to cease to exist, until we realize that when we cease to exist we won't be aware of ceasing to exist. Oblivion is our default state and has been for all but a weak flash in an infinitesimally small part of eternity. We are going home to the way we were, just stardust and nothing more and we will remain that way until the universe ends and the stardust is gone, and we won't so much as leave one carbon footprint.
 
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