What were you most unprepared for when you got older ?

I a
Gary O' said:

What were you most unprepared for when you got older ?​


Thought it would take longer
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I agree, Gary. When you are young, you can’t imagine what it will be like getting older, but slowly and surely, you do. As I got older, I didn’t think things were going to be as tough as they were. For me, making decisions were always difficult. When I graduated from high school, I went right into college with no cost to me. I didn’t really have any personal responsibility paying bills and the like, until I graduated college. At that time, life became an eye opener. I went from college directly into the Marines, but I still had to start paying bills. At first, I lived on base to save money, but I wanted a car, so then I had car payments. I needed clothes to wear. Who wants to wear battle dress or fatigues all the time? Same for shoes. I sent up a bank account and had all my money direct deposited. I also had 1 credit card with that bank and authorized that the bank pay off the card each month. I had a $500 limit on my card. If it went past that, the card would be rejected. That’s embarrassing, but it’s better than some guys that were running their card up into the thousands. When I got my apartment, I had to raise the limit to pay the rent. Staying in San Diego and Pensacola were both expensive. Norfolk and Quantico were reasonable. Almost half as much. I hated paying rent. It was like money down the drain. I bought my first home 3 days after I retired from the military. I even ended up dating the realtor. She asked me out. She was going through a divorce and was going to a wedding on that coming Saturday, which was in 2 days snd asked me if I would be her escort. I was confused because being someone’s escort meant something different to me. We got that straightened out by the next day.
 
hollydolly said:
No, in answer to your question... most people don't get pensions from their companies unless they've paid into them, themselves with a top up from their employer.. most people on minimum or barely minimum wage could never afford to pay into a workplace pensions scheme

In the Uk we pay National Insurance contributions during our working life.. it's supposed to pay in part for our State pensions.. but despite that our State pensions are very small and everyone gets the same amount regardless of how much NI people have paid during their lifetime.. ( those who earn more pay more but don't receive more when it's retirement time) so all the state pension is now.. is around £9,000 per year that's all...for those who have paid full NI contributions and only if they paid a minimum of 33 years worth .. but that isn't the full story.. While employed if a person only worked part-time as many mothers did while raising their children.. then they paid a Reduced NI contribution.. which meant..and means still, that they get a very reduced state pension now in retirement .. that means there are literally millions of widowed and single women trying to survive on a state pension of around £6,00 per year with a pension credit top up of approx £96 per annum... with no Workplace pension .. and no other income from the state ..
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That’s a very good explanation. If you don’t mind, I have a few other questions. Are people able to get by comfortably with their state pensions? Do those people that receive much less because of working less rent small apartments or were they able to buy their house before retirement? Does everyone pay utility bills or are they included in their taxes? How much per month do utilities cost. Electric? Gas? Water? Trash collection? Cable TV, Internet and Phone? Do you know if food costs more or less than here in the U.S.?

I spent a lot of time in the Mid East and the cost of living seems very reasonable compared to other places I have been. I think the UAE is the most expensive in that area.
 

I think advances in the technology world is the hardest for me to grasp. I am not a computer person and still love paper (books, magazine, newspaper, writing paper, calendars, etc. etc.) It seems as soon as I learn something it changes. Sigh... and I am so ignorant of how other older people in other countries manage their tech stuff and basic life skills with their money situations. I am fortunate to live where I do and the many advantages that I have. I am grateful for that.

p.s. I am also not as active as I used to be with joint pain and more fearful of falling or coming up against someone who is aggressive and I am unable to defend myself.
 
What was I not prepared for?
Illness. When you're 18, you're young, with a brand new body-everything , at least works. When you become 50ish, things stop functioning so smoothly. And you have only ONE doctor. As you get older, you acquire more health issues and doctors, When you're 18, you picture yourself being 96 years old and still chopping wood. It's that" illness" was never in your dreams.
 
Georgiagranny said:
Holy cow. There must be a lot of homeless old people in the UK! Or living in substandard housing without electricity or water.
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I'm afraid there is a lot of old people living in abject poverty who cannot afford to heat their homes, and this before all these HUGE price hikes this year.. our NHS hospital beds are full of elderly who can't go home because they can;t afford to look after themselves, they're known as Bed Blockers .. therefore we have an ongoing situation whereby our Hospital admission queues are Gigantic, absolutely millions on the waiting list for operations who can't get into hospital partly due to the situation with Bed Blockers..

..however this is all political and I really don't want this thread to go down that route...
 
fuzzybuddy said:
What was I not prepared for?
Illness. When you're 18, you're young, with a brand new body-everything , at least works. When you become 50ish, things stop functioning so smoothly. And you have only ONE doctor. As you get older, you acquire more health issues and doctors, When you're 18, you picture yourself being 96 years old and still chopping wood. It's that" illness" was never in your dreams.
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absolutely so true... as you say..even if you can imagine being 90 when you're 18, which most of us can't, we imagine we're just a slower version of ourselves, no-one tells you about the pain, the illnesses, the eyes that can no longer see to read perhaps, the slowness of movement.. .. no-one.. tells you you probably will have a hard time making your own bed for yourself ... no-one...
 
Being so fragile. Injured so much and unable to do all I used to and need to do. But this is largely because I haven't been allowed to see a doctor in almost 3 years because of that word I will not use here but all who know me know what it is.

@hollydolly, I can't imagine anyone not noticing you! Have you tried wearing diamonds? When my mom was in the hospital she gave me her diamonds to hold so I wore them on one hand with my own diamonds on the other. OMG did people notice me and treat me better in a hurry. You're an April baby, so diamonds are your birth stone. I'd give it a try. You might be surprised at people's reactions to you if you do. They treated me like royalty, I imagine, and I could get used to that in a hurry! :giggle:
 
Pepper said:
Like @Kika I was always bold & forthright. Now I fear I would lose any battle I might fall into, so I just shut up. Except for here!

eta
I feel frail compared to most people. That has been the main reason for my reticence to go out much. Never was afraid of 'nuts' before, now there are so many & they're bigger than shrinking me! Lost a lot of courage along with those four inches in height.
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I don’t think you’ve lost your courage, I think you’ve gained common sense.

When we were younger, in our teens, we felt invincible and would ”face up” to the bad guys. As we grew into our twenties, we learned to pick out battles and walk away. In our thirties, we learned we had a lot to lose and became more careful.

By our sixties, we realized the frailties of our lives and common sense began to prevail. Do I really want to walk down that dark street alone? Nope. Male or female; I can no longer scream loud, run fast, or fight hard. I take care where I walk and where I go and when.

But, if my child any child, any human being, were down that dark street, crying out; I would go, or yell out, or call for help. Courage, tempered by common sense, is still courage.
 
Liberty said:
they just aren't making mirrors like they used to!
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I need to print this out and stick in on all my mirrors. 😂

hollydolly said:
absolutely so true... as you say..even if you can imagine being 90 when you're 18, which most of us can't, we imagine we're just a slower version of ourselves, no-one tells you about the pain, the illnesses, the eyes that can no longer see to read perhaps, the slowness of movement.. .. no-one.. tells you you probably will have a hard time making your own bed for yourself ... no-one...
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They probably told us and we didn’t hear. Now the youth aren’t listening to us.
 
chic said:
Being so fragile. Injured so much and unable to do all I used to and need to do. But this is largely because I haven't been allowed to see a doctor in almost 3 years because of that word I will not use here but all who know me know what it is.

@hollydolly, I can't imagine anyone not noticing you! Have you tried wearing diamonds? When my mom was in the hospital she gave me her diamonds to hold so I wore them on one hand with my own diamonds on the other. OMG did people notice me and treat me better in a hurry. You're an April baby, so diamonds are your birth stone. I'd give it a try. You might be surprised at people's reactions to you if you do. They treated me like royalty, I imagine, and I could get used to that in a hurry! :giggle:
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Well I have diamonds in my rings and in some bracelets.. but yes I suppose people wouldn't overlook me if I was standing there in Joggers, trainers and a Tiara... :ROFLMAO:
 
Aneeda72 said:
I don’t think you’ve lost your courage, I think you’ve gained common sense.

When we were younger, in our teens, we felt invincible and would ”face up” to the bad guys. As we grew into our twenties, we learned to pick out battles and walk away.
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I guess I missed that whole decade out....:LOL:
 
hollydolly said:
were you not prepared for that Lois ?.. being honest.. at nearly 90 years old and a retired Nurse.. .. did you not expect that , I would have imagined you would have been more prepared than most tbh.. :)
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Holly, I never even expected to live this long, much less think about it. So, I guess I thought as long as I could breathe, I could do whatever. That is, if ever I thought at all. ;)
 
Lewkat said:
Holly, I never even expected to live this long, much less think about it. So, I guess I thought as long as I could breathe, I could do whatever. That is, if ever I thought at all. ;)
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you know, I feel I know exactly what you mean. :giggle:

I never thought that I would get to this age.. albeit my 60's..but I never did, it never crossed my mind I would, in fact I was thoroughly convinced I would die young as my mother did.. so I really didn't make preparations for this.. in whatever way one might be able to prepare
 

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