What will be your last thoughts?

G

GoodEnuff

Senior Member
You know how sometimes a strange thought pops into your head out of nowhere? Yesterday, I was thinking about my Mom who died four years ago at age 97. She loved this place and all her stuff. I think she loved it more than anything or anyone. When we cleared it out, the dumpster was filled twice and that didn't include furniture.

One thought led to another and I wonder...when she was close to death, was she thinking about her stuff? Her beloved fish trap which was used once? All of those dishes from "antique" stores, packed away in boxes and never used? Clothes that were decades old and literally falling apart? Broken furniture, all kinds of junk from garage sales?

She lived a mostly good life. A good husband, seven children, and a great career in her last 20 years of work. A pillar of the community, to which she contributed much. The last week of her life, she was alert and aware and knew the end was at hand. Was she thinking of all her precious stuff, which ended up in the land fill?

I wonder what my last thoughts will be?
 
That stuff were her memories, I bet each one brought her happy warm thoughts and for her to pass among them
had to be so much better than in a room with nothing for her to think about. You and your family gave her a gift
by not taking those things from her.
I officially died twice and for me when the end was approaching, all I knew was peace, no pain, no memories
I just slid into the abyss.
When I was brought back, my immediate thought was, where's my sons and husband? I remember that clearly.
It can be so different with each person I think.
 
GoodEnuff said:
There were arguments about it but she always prevailed.
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I have seen that before too or the family fighting over stuff after. My experience taught me to downsize
before the real final end comes and I gave to them things they wanted ahead of time. No matter where I am and when it happens,
I am sure someone is going to be irked at me for some task they have to do. It's not ever a pleasurable event.
 
I don't know if it would be better or worse to know you're dying.. and to fret perhaps over everything that you will no longer know...

My mother died in her sleep after taking an overdose of prescription pills , I doubt she had any thoughts in her head that night after she retired to bed.. if she did it would just be to block out the world...

I never sleep well.. my sleep is dream filled every night..without fail...

One time after an anaesthetic and surgery in hospital.. I realised after I was woken .. that for the first time there was nothing while I slept.. not one single dream... it was like I'd closed my eyes , and re-opened them.. except it was hours later... and that, unless someone is in pain..is how I imagine death is... One minute here, and the next gone with nothing in between...
 
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It's impossible to know what my last thoughts will be, but they probably won't be about my "stuff."

Nevertheless, the material things I have such as paintings by my mother, gifts my wife and daughter gave me, certain antiques from my grandmother, and the list goes on . . . are meaningful to me while I'm here. I have no plans to dispose of them to make things more convenient for my heirs. Since they are inheriting my home, my car, and all funds on deposit at the bank, I consider that clearing the house by whatever means they see fit is more than fair compensation for their efforts.
 
hollydolly said:
I don't know if it would be better or worse to know you're dying.. and to fret perhaps over everything that you will no longer know...

My mother died in her sleep after taking an overdose of prescription pills , I doubt she had any thoughts in her head that night after she retired to bed.. if she did it would just be to block out the world...

I never sleep well.. my sleep is dream filled every night..without fail...

One time after an anaesthetic and surgery in hospital.. I realised after I was woken .. that for the first time there was nothing while I slept.. not one single dream... it was like I'd closed my eyes , and re-opened them.. except it was hours later... and that, unless someone is in pain..is how I imagine death is... One minute here, and the next gone with nothing in between...
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That's the weird thing about anesthesia for me....no dreams. Normal sleep: lots and lots of dreams, epic dreams, upsetting dreams, long dreams. Anesthesia: I blink my eyes and nothing has happened during the time I was out. I swear I had my eyes closed for one second. What turns off in our brains during anesthesia? I'd like some of that; some nights, my dreams just wear me out and I wake up in a panic.
 
jujube said:
That's the weird thing about anesthesia for me....no dreams. Normal sleep: lots and lots of dreams, epic dreams, upsetting dreams, long dreams. Anesthesia: I blink my eyes and nothing has happened during the time I was out. I swear I had my eyes closed for one second. What turns off in our brains during anesthesia? I'd like some of that; some nights, my dreams just wear me out and I wake up in a panic.
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Exactly , you've just described my regular night's sleep...many nights nightmare filled, wake up heart beating out of my chest.... sweats... terrible... other nights might not be nightmares but very dream filled.. very odd dreams as well..make no sense.. .. and the worst is, I don't wake up refreshed I wake up exhausted.. ..I wish I knew what the cause is... have you any idea what causes yours ?,

My X husband said he never dreamt.. that he knew of.. as far as he was concerned every night he shut his eyes and the next thing he knew it was 5am an the alarm was going off and he always woke refreshed ... I can't tell how I envied him... the only difference between him and me was that he always drank alcohol before bed...
 
Speaking from my own experience of a near death event. I blacked out at the moment of impact, felt no pain, no fear, nothing, then woke up somewhere dark, warm, and comfortable, and wanted to stay there. Unfortunately, several voices started telling me I had to go back. I didn't want to, and kept saying to them that I wanted to stay where I was, but they became more and more strident, and then I started feeling cold, and a loud buzzing started in my ears. The loud noise was my motorbike engine revving itself to bits as it lay in the middle of the road, and I found myself lying on the corner of the pavement with my feet hanging off the kerb into the road.

I can only surmise from that experience that there is something else after death, but what it will be when the time comes I can't say. However, my experience wasn't painful. My body switched off like a light, so I didn't feel the impact with the side of the lorry I hit, and only after I'd been awake for a couple of minutes did I start to feel uncomfortably short of breath, and in any kind of pain.
 
My last thought will probly be "I hope I'm doing the right thing."

@GoodEnuff - My aunt collected a lot of stuff, too, and she did seem to care more about her collections than she did her husband and kids. They resented her "treasures" so much, none of them wanted any of it after she died (her husband died several years before). They didn't try to sell any of it and didn't donate anything to Goodwill or whatever, they just rented a dumpster and tossed it all out. In fact, they made a game of who could make the loudest breaking-glass sound in one toss.

I helped them clear out her house that day, and it was sad to see. But that's on her, really. I couldn't be mad at them.
 
I definitely won't think about all I accomplished professionally, all the recreational activities I pursued or the places I've traveled, those things are kind of meaningless to me.

If I have time to think it will be about my kids, how I love them and how I hope my passing isn't burdensome for them.
 
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