Who Is To Blame Here, Me Or Her?

Lee

Lee

Senior Member
Location
Chatham, Ontario
I went out this morning to find the door blocked by a plastic bag of books. I had lent a neighbor books way before Christmas and she dropped them off on the porch last night.

Problem.....it rained and the books are soaked. Not sure what will happen if they can be dried out, pages stuck together???

I sent her a text asking her why she would leave them in the rain. She replied that she had knocked on the door but I must be deaf so she sent me a text message telling me the books were there.

I did not get the message till I turned the phone on this morning. Too late. They were good hard cover books too.

You vote, who is right and who is wrong.
 

I wonder if she didn't know it was going to rain. If over there was anything like here then yes, it was probably her fault. It's been raining around here since last night. Maybe she thought they would get picked up before it rained. An honest mistake, maybe? I know I wouldn't leave good books out in the open.
 

You were right to lend her the books, and we all know that things lent do not always come back or come back in good condition. So you generously took that risk for your friend.

Your friend should have tried harder to protect the books, but she did attempt their safe return.

Best to let go, if you can. Telling her what happened to the books was right, now she knows.

In my experience I have never been able to rehab a book that has gotten wet. I would just throw the out.
 
Alligatorob said:
You were right to lend her the books, and we all know that things lent do not always come back or come back in good condition. So you generously took that risk for your friend.

Your friend should have tried harder to protect the books, but she did attempt their safe return.

Best to let go, if you can. Telling her what happened to the books was right, now she knows.

In my experience I have never been able to rehab a book that has gotten wet. I would just throw the out.
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Ain't that the truth. I treat other people's properties better than my own. I know what how bad I feel when my stuff gets ruined, let alone by others.
 
I would have texted first, waited for your response and arranged a time for me to come by and drop off the books. If someone is kind enough to lend me something then I have a responsibility to return the item in the condition in which I received it. I'm not a fan of the drop and run.
 
Leann said:
I'm not a fan of the drop and run.
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I'm not either, but in this case I don't believe she wanted a face to face. Something happened prior and she has to know I am not happy about it even though I have not said a word, not yet anyway.

I wish we would have had the opportunity to talk things out had she come to the door that might have happened.
 
Lee said:
I sent her a text asking her why she would leave them in the rain.
She replied that she had knocked on the door but I must be deaf
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Anyone who says, "You must be deaf"...is wrong right out of the gate.
Then she does this to someone who kindly gifted her with the opportunity to read these books for free.
Then she texts? Does she not have the decency to call??
And knowingly ruins your gift of borrowed books.
No brainer...she was wrong.
 
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Lee said:
I'm not either, but in this case I don't believe she wanted a face to face. Something happened prior and she has to know I am not happy about it even though I have not said a word, not yet anyway.

I wish we would have had the opportunity to talk things out had she come to the door that might have happened.
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she clearly didn't knock IMO.... and she is 100% wrong. I would be spitting feathers if it had been my books... books are like Jewels to me...
 
She was wrong. She should have called and asked for permission to drop off the books at a time convenient for you. If she was too embarrassed over the other thing to want to talk to you, or face you, she could have at least waited for a fair weather day and dropped them off in a waterproof bag or box.
 
She’s 100% wrong. Never lend her anything again.

Was there an area around the house where she could have left the books? If so, she was being more than lazy.

If she can send a text, she can call you to let you know the books were at the door. No excuses work for her.

P.S. What time of night did she do the drop off?
 
The books are probably ruined. Don't lend books again. Try a hair blower on the pages if they are still wet. Paper is dead. Sorry. Theye should have been wrapped up in a container. Thoughtless.
 
RFW said:
I wonder if she didn't know it was going to rain. If over there was anything like here then yes, it was probably her fault. It's been raining around here since last night. Maybe she thought they would get picked up before it rained. An honest mistake, maybe? I know I wouldn't leave good books out in the open.
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I also wouldn't have kept them for three months. Instead of returning them at night, it seems like keeping them through one more and then returning them in the daylight would have been the neighborly thing to do. Many seniors don't go out much at night so she could have figured that they wouldn't be found until morning at best. I say, contact Judge Judy and let her decide!
 
Well, the plot thickens! If there was already an “Issue” between you and her, that complicates things. She wanted to be perceived as “doing the right thing” by returning the books, even if rain were forecast, with a touch of “Here’s your GD books, SmartA…”
Getting back at you for whatever the problem was.

If someone did something like to me I’d consider the relationship irrevocably ended.
As I’ve gotten way old, I no longer give second chances to folks who have treated me badly, whether accidentally or on purpose. Life getting too short.
 

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