fuzzybuddy
SF VIP
- Location
- The Sticks, Northeast PA.
Why is it that we can give great advice to others, but we can't always fix our own problems?
Why can't we always fix our own problems?
- Thread starter fuzzybuddy
- Start date
dilettante
Well-known Member
- Location
- Michigan
Sometimes talking it through with others helps us address the matter ourselves. Some of that might just be hearing ourselves talk it out, having our words mirrored back, or hearing things we already know but push down not wanting to accept. And of course there is always the possibility of the education, experience, or wisdom of others.
But it does sometimes seem like we can end up doing a lot of yelling at each other. Perhaps we're all becoming a bit hard of hearing?
But it does sometimes seem like we can end up doing a lot of yelling at each other. Perhaps we're all becoming a bit hard of hearing?
JustDave
Well-known Member
Ha! That's a wonderful question. I'm thinking there is something in the question that tells us a little about ourselves.
hollydolly
SF VIP
- Location
- London England
Oh I'm useless at giving advice to anyone..... but thankfully I have wonderful wise friends who give sagely advice to me..
VaughanJB
Scrappy VIP
Well, we don't always give great advice to others, nor are all problems solvable.
I've been public about my own issues, and it's hell. Days fly by, and it just feels like time flushed away. I know I could change things, I know several different options, but it's all pain and I'd rather avoid it. Not to mention, inflicting pain on someone else, it just never feels great.
The question I guess is, what would I advise someone in my situation to do? I think advice is easy to give when you're not emotionally involved, you know? So any advice given is subtracted that. It's easier to be completely logical when giving advice.
Mind you, not all advice is good......
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That was the beauty of living in the mountains in our off grid cabin
Wife and I would discuss our options before starting a project.
Our first projects were quite critical in regard to food, water, shelter
So
we'd build a camp fire
sip some coffee
discuss our next project (like a roof on our cabin before winter)
Then
'Well, it's not gonna build itself
and nobody is gonna do it for us'
'Winter's comin'
'Hand me that board once I get up the ladder'
Out there we quickly learned self sufficiency
Became quite confident
even a bit proud
Later learned how much we need our Lord
Paco Dennis
SF VIP
- Location
- Mid-Missouri
I was stumped by this question. I had to ask someone smarter than me. I asked Bing Chat who lives in my smartphone. She had a bunch to say about it. 
That’s a very interesting question. There is no simple answer to why we can’t fix our own problems, but I can share some possible reasons and suggestions based on the web search results I found.
One reason why we might struggle to solve our own problems is that we are too emotionally involved in them. When we face a problem, we might feel anxious, frustrated, angry, or hopeless. These emotions can cloud our judgment and prevent us from seeing the situation objectively. We might also have some cognitive biases that distort our perception of reality and make us focus on the negative aspects of the problem1.
Another reason why we might find it hard to fix our own problems is that we lack the necessary skills or resources to do so. Some problems are complex and require specialized knowledge, expertise, or tools to solve them. For example, if we have a health problem, we might need to consult a doctor or get a medical test. If we have a legal problem, we might need to hire a lawyer or go to court. If we have a financial problem, we might need to budget, save, or invest our money wisely2.
A third reason why we might fail to solve our own problems is that we procrastinate or avoid them. Sometimes, we might feel overwhelmed by the problem and not know where to start or what to do. We might also fear the consequences of taking action or making a decision. We might think that the problem will go away by itself or that someone else will solve it for us. However, ignoring or delaying a problem can often make it worse and create more stress3.
So what can we do to overcome these challenges and become better problem solvers? Here are some tips based on the web search results:
Be confident. Believe that you have the ability and the potential to solve your problem. Research shows that having confidence can increase your motivation and help you achieve your goals4.
Be proactive. Think ahead and anticipate any potential obstacles or risks that might arise in your problem-solving process. Plan ahead and prepare for different scenarios. Take action and don’t wait for the perfect moment or solution.
Be open-minded. Consider different perspectives and opinions on your problem. Brainstorm and generate multiple possible solutions. Evaluate the pros and cons of each option and choose the best one for your situation.
Be systematic. Break down your problem into smaller and more manageable parts. Create a step-by-step plan to implement your solution. Monitor your progress and adjust your plan if needed.
Be resourceful. Use the available tools and resources to help you solve your problem. For example, you can use the internet to search for information, advice, or examples. You can also ask for help from friends, family, experts, or professionals if you need it.
I hope this helps you understand some of the reasons why we can’t fix our own problems and some of the ways we can improve our problem-solving skills. Remember that problems are inevitable in life, but they are also opportunities for learning and growth.
If you want to learn more about problem-solving, you can check out these web pages:
Dealing With Your Problems: Tips and Tricks | Psych Central
13 Common Life Problems And How To Fix Them - LifeHack
The psychological steps in solving complex personal problems
The Problem-Solving Process - Verywell Mind
That’s a very interesting question. There is no simple answer to why we can’t fix our own problems, but I can share some possible reasons and suggestions based on the web search results I found.
One reason why we might struggle to solve our own problems is that we are too emotionally involved in them. When we face a problem, we might feel anxious, frustrated, angry, or hopeless. These emotions can cloud our judgment and prevent us from seeing the situation objectively. We might also have some cognitive biases that distort our perception of reality and make us focus on the negative aspects of the problem1.
Another reason why we might find it hard to fix our own problems is that we lack the necessary skills or resources to do so. Some problems are complex and require specialized knowledge, expertise, or tools to solve them. For example, if we have a health problem, we might need to consult a doctor or get a medical test. If we have a legal problem, we might need to hire a lawyer or go to court. If we have a financial problem, we might need to budget, save, or invest our money wisely2.
A third reason why we might fail to solve our own problems is that we procrastinate or avoid them. Sometimes, we might feel overwhelmed by the problem and not know where to start or what to do. We might also fear the consequences of taking action or making a decision. We might think that the problem will go away by itself or that someone else will solve it for us. However, ignoring or delaying a problem can often make it worse and create more stress3.
So what can we do to overcome these challenges and become better problem solvers? Here are some tips based on the web search results:
Be confident. Believe that you have the ability and the potential to solve your problem. Research shows that having confidence can increase your motivation and help you achieve your goals4.
Be proactive. Think ahead and anticipate any potential obstacles or risks that might arise in your problem-solving process. Plan ahead and prepare for different scenarios. Take action and don’t wait for the perfect moment or solution.
Be open-minded. Consider different perspectives and opinions on your problem. Brainstorm and generate multiple possible solutions. Evaluate the pros and cons of each option and choose the best one for your situation.
Be systematic. Break down your problem into smaller and more manageable parts. Create a step-by-step plan to implement your solution. Monitor your progress and adjust your plan if needed.
Be resourceful. Use the available tools and resources to help you solve your problem. For example, you can use the internet to search for information, advice, or examples. You can also ask for help from friends, family, experts, or professionals if you need it.
I hope this helps you understand some of the reasons why we can’t fix our own problems and some of the ways we can improve our problem-solving skills. Remember that problems are inevitable in life, but they are also opportunities for learning and growth.
If you want to learn more about problem-solving, you can check out these web pages:
Dealing With Your Problems: Tips and Tricks | Psych Central
13 Common Life Problems And How To Fix Them - LifeHack
The psychological steps in solving complex personal problems
The Problem-Solving Process - Verywell Mind
I would have to say ego and emotion. It is so simple to see someone else's shortcomings and so difficult to see our own.
Nathan
SF VIP
- Location
- High Desert- Calif.
It's in the doing. Telling others what to do makes it their responsibility. It's likely that we need to do the same thing in our life, but then now it's our task, not as easy...