Why Do Men Have To Supervise Other Handymen?

Lee

Lee

Senior Member
Location
Chatham, Ontario
Tomorrow the handyman is coming back to install the awning and cap the window on the house. I just know that my neighbor will be over to watch and give unwanted advice.

Last week he supervised the install of the outside tap. And told me after he thinks it was done wrong.

And last week a watermain broke down the street and 7 guys were watching the man dig the hole with the bobcat. One woman only.

Why do you gents do this?
 

There can be a thin line as to when you give advice about a project you happen to witness.

Case in point.

Last year our new neighbors, a young couple buying their first house, the Air Conditioner quit working.
I was mowing our back lawn and after I finished, was having a beer on the Deck.
Noticed the man looking at the unit and talking to his wife though the back window and shaking his head.
That's when I figured they were having a problem.
Part of me said, " Leave it alone ", but the other side of me said, " See if you can help ".
Remembered what I was taught by my Dad about being a good neighbor, walked over to the fence line and asked if
everything was ok.

He told me the unit was just stopping putting out cold air and I offered to take a look at it.
He thanked me and said he called a friend who knew a guy, who would take care of it.
Told him, " No problem, hope everything works out " and went back to finish my beer.

Later that day, a pickup truck pulled up to his house and a gent started working on the unit.
He spent maybe 30 minutes working on it and set a jug of Freon next to the unit.
He had hoses, but no gauges or scale. This just isn't done.

To make a long story short, I later was told the service guy had fixed the problem by putting more Freon in the unit
and the bill was about $450. By this time, the wives at become friends, and my wife mentioned that I was an retired HVAC
guy.

We had them over for a cook out this year and he brought up the A/C unit fix from last year.
I mentioned that I was going to clean the coil on my unit and since I had the solution already mixed, I would clean his, no charge.
( did I mention somewhere I'd make this a short story... ha! )

What I found was a 'new' capacitor ( maybe a $50 part ) and the door for introducing Freon to his unit hadn't been touch in years.
So the gents profit for that call was probably around $400.
The main part of the bill was for the Freon. The unit he has takes a Freon that is very, vey expensive because it is no longer produced.
Felt real sorry for them, they are just starting out in life.

I can understand his initial reluctance at my offer to help. I also think that he may have learned a lesson about help being offered.

What I learned was to sometimes just sit on the deck and enjoy that beer...
 
I learned, a long time ago, to stay out of a workman's way....I just hover in the background offering to answer any questions, etc., that they may have. I sometimes ran into a similar situation when I was working....some customer would be looking over my shoulder as I was trying to fix their problem. I found that the best approach was to just put down my tools, and engage them in a friendly conversation...instead of concentrating on the "fix". It usually didn't take long for them to realize that while they were bugging me, I wasn't getting anything done.
 
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Don M. said:
I learned, a long time ago, to stay out of a workman's way....I just hover in the background offering to answer any questions, etc., that they many have. I sometimes ran into a similar situation when I was working....some customer would be looking over my shoulder as I was trying to fix their problem. I found that the best approach was to just put down my tools, and engage them in a friendly conversation...instead of concentrating on the "fix". It usually didn't take long for them to realize that while they were bugging me, I wasn't getting anything done.
Click to expand...
Sensible tactics both as customer and as workman.
 
Alligatorob said:
Something in the Y chromosome I guess!

Just seems natural, I've always wondered why women could let such important things go unsupervised, LOL.
Click to expand...
See, i was going to comment that i think SOMEONE needs to be 'around', it's usually been me even when married. Not talking at or asking questions unless they initiated conversation, just nearby in case they had a question and so i could see what they were doing--learned a lot that way. (i also watched when 2nd Hubby who was a mechanic worked on my clunker of car, learned a lot there too.)
 
My daughter got fascinated recently watching a YT channel of a Plumber, who gets very upset about poorly done jobs and ripped off customers, the idea of his videos is to give customers some idea of what they should watch for, what is reasonable pricing and payment schedule. It is NEITHER standard nor wise to pay the full amount of estimate up front, request itemized bill and receipts for parts sold to you. My first husband was a small contractor for awhile, mostly carpentry, but that was how he did it too.
 
Ceege said:
I came up with a word many years ago :unsure: ....."stuperviser". A stuperviser is someone who wants so to supervise a job they know nothing about. Seen it many times. It just must be one of those unavoidable life experiences.
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It should be in the dictionary! i actually used that mentality to get my #1 DH to fix a leaky faucet. It was 1975, Our twins were infants i was getting very little sleep and constantly on the go. My MIL was coming to visit soon and kitchen faucet was leaking. Just needed new washer but between being sleep deprived and the interruptions i knew would come with the boys needing diaper changes or feeding, i thought---'he can do it'. i asked him twice some days apart. More than that is 'nagging' in my book (which he knew) i won't do it.

So i timed my own effort for when i knew he'd be around and rested. Assembled the tools, package of washers on the counter near sink shut off the water to faucet and began removing. the handle. Sure enough he comes along and tells me that i'm doing it all wrong. "Really?" "Yes, and besides i was going to do it." By this time i had it to where if it wasn't reassembled we couldn't use the hot water in that sink. i feigned indignance and replied. "Fine, since you're so much more skilled. You do it!" Almost as if cued to, one of the boys cried out from their crib. and i 'stormed off'. By the time diaper changes done, DH had finished with the sink.

Now i am not proud of that, i dislike manipulation as much as nagging, i prefer straight forward transactions with people, especially family. But i was desperate, and he had it coming. Ironically, it was sometime that year in the middle of an argument that he said "If you were an Indian (Hindu not Native American) wife, you wouldn't argue with me." My response 'You want an Indian wife? I can do that' and proceeded to list all the behaviors of his female relatives he had complained to me about over the years (including nagging and manipulative tactics). He changed course real quick.
 
Not sure about the science but in my case, our kitchen faucet was leaking. Normally we have a park member (a retired plumber) fix the problems. He is an avid anti-vaxxer whom isn't welcome in my house. The plumber we called has a standing charge for first hour $149.50. I wanted to make sure I was getting my money's worth
 
We had a lovely old gentleman a couple of houses down from us in Michigan. Frank knew how to do just about everything and had just about every part you'd ever need to fix your problem from the tiniest little special screw to a huge part that he'd say you were doing him a service by taking it. He was so bored with retirement and was camping at the bit to help.

It was considered a kindness to wander down to Frank for "advice" before doing anything on your own and to let him supervise. Even better was to have him on hand when a service person came. They all knew him and they were very unlikely to try to pull a "fast one" with Eagle Eye Frank watching their every move.

Frank asked for nothing in return and refused any psyment, just the chance to get out of the house and do something "manly". If a beer or a shot of something was offered, all the better (his wife wouldn't let him drink....)

My husband kept Frank's walk and sidewalk cleared in the winter in gratitude.

Good old Frank. They don't make 'em like that anymore.
 
Lee said:
Tomorrow the handyman is coming back to install the awning and cap the window on the house. I just know that my neighbor will be over to watch and give unwanted advice.

Last week he supervised the install of the outside tap. And told me after he thinks it was done wrong.

And last week a watermain broke down the street and 7 guys were watching the man dig the hole with the bobcat. One woman only.

Why do you gents do this?
Click to expand...
Lee, let's hope your neighbour doesn't turn up in an operating theatre and saying to the surgeon, "Would you like me to put my finger on that stitch while you tie a knot in it?"

I'm not one of those fellas that stand watching workmen, it was pure coincidence for me last Tuesday that those men high up in the trees were lopping off branches, and I had to pause for 20 minutes, just to catch my breath.
Then on Wednesday (again coincidentally) I had to stop because part of the main road was being resurfaced.
On Thursday, would you believe it, I was out for a walk, minding my own business, when I heard shouting. A men had come out of a house and was hurling abuse at a woman standing by the front door, she hurled a tin of baked bean at him, "What a good shot I thought." :)
 
We have a State road going through our town. There are 5 or 6 guys up on the sidewalk, watching one guy down in the ditch working.
They have over 1/2 the town shut down & big trucks are getting stuck in the construction area trying to deliver to stores in town.
 

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