SifuPhil
R.I.P. With Us In Spirit Only
- Location
- Pennsylvania, USA
When you've been a teacher for as long as I have been - 37 years and counting - you field a LOT of questions from your students. While it is true that every question is important, at least to the person asking it, after the first few hundred repetitions your answers begin to take on a dull, non-motivational sheen.
That's not good. Not for the students, not for you and not for anyone within earshot.
This is why I began searching for The Ultimate Answer (TUA).
At first I tried a few obvious answers - "Look it up" seemed to be a favorite at the time, but when it came to teaching physical movements in martial arts classes it was hardly a good choice. I mean, how do you look up how to do a roundhouse kick? Sure, NOW we have YouTube and DVDs and all those other marvels of modern technology, but back when yours truly was pondering this problem those things didn't exist.
"Well, let's work it out" was another time-honored cherry among many teachers. It helped create an atmosphere of learning how to learn - instilling the love of research and experimentation in the student at a young, impressionable age. While this method does have its advantages it is all too easy for the student to agree, then sit back and feign ignorance as the teacher does all the work. Hardly equitable.
It was actually through my study of Chinese philosophy that I came up with what proved to be The Ultimate Answer. It has been used to great effect in centuries of teachings in the Orient and, lately, in the Western nations.
It is simply this: "Yes and No".
Here's an example of how "Yes and No" works: say one of my students comes to me and says "Sifu, should I enter that tournament next Saturday?" If I say "yes" my student will think that I am advocating his possible life-long disfigurement for the sake of a plastic-and-aluminum trophy that wholesales for about $1.99. If I say "no" my student will forever after tell stories to his great-grandchildren of how his teacher kept him from achieving those stratospheric heights of fame and glory.
Either way, I lose, as does the student. I lose because no matter what I say I'll be seen as the bad guy. My student loses because no matter what I say he'll blame someone else for his inability to make valid choices, forever playing the victim.
But if I tell him "Yes and No" several things will happen: first, he will look upon me as one of the Ancient Sages, a Dispenser of Esoteric Knowledge so deep that mortal man cannot hope to understand it, only ponder and reflect and meditate upon its true meaning. Trust me - BS like that goes far in the martial arts world.
Second, it will give him a clue, a vital hint, that the world is not black and white; that it is in fact many, many shades of gray (No references to poorly-written pseudo-erotica bestsellers, please). He will intuit that whether or not he enters that tournament doesn't really matter; it is the PROCESS, not the END RESULT, that matters. This frees his mind and allows him to transcend such materialistic bounds.
Did I mention that it makes me look as cool as a cat's ass on an iceberg? It does.
"Yes and No" is not just limited to the martial arts world, either: think of all the uses you could find for this phrase. When your husband asks if you want to go out to dinner this Saturday, tell him "Yes and No" - this will keep him guessing, always a good thing to do with husbands (it's their natural state and they feel uncomfortable with solid plans). When you go to church on Sunday and the Reverend asks if there are any sinners among you, stand up and proudly yell "Yes and No!" - you'll be sure to be the talk of the town for weeks to come!
Here are just a few more of the almost infinite possibilities for this wonderful Answer ...
That's not good. Not for the students, not for you and not for anyone within earshot.
This is why I began searching for The Ultimate Answer (TUA).
At first I tried a few obvious answers - "Look it up" seemed to be a favorite at the time, but when it came to teaching physical movements in martial arts classes it was hardly a good choice. I mean, how do you look up how to do a roundhouse kick? Sure, NOW we have YouTube and DVDs and all those other marvels of modern technology, but back when yours truly was pondering this problem those things didn't exist.
"Well, let's work it out" was another time-honored cherry among many teachers. It helped create an atmosphere of learning how to learn - instilling the love of research and experimentation in the student at a young, impressionable age. While this method does have its advantages it is all too easy for the student to agree, then sit back and feign ignorance as the teacher does all the work. Hardly equitable.
It was actually through my study of Chinese philosophy that I came up with what proved to be The Ultimate Answer. It has been used to great effect in centuries of teachings in the Orient and, lately, in the Western nations.
It is simply this: "Yes and No".
Here's an example of how "Yes and No" works: say one of my students comes to me and says "Sifu, should I enter that tournament next Saturday?" If I say "yes" my student will think that I am advocating his possible life-long disfigurement for the sake of a plastic-and-aluminum trophy that wholesales for about $1.99. If I say "no" my student will forever after tell stories to his great-grandchildren of how his teacher kept him from achieving those stratospheric heights of fame and glory.
Either way, I lose, as does the student. I lose because no matter what I say I'll be seen as the bad guy. My student loses because no matter what I say he'll blame someone else for his inability to make valid choices, forever playing the victim.
But if I tell him "Yes and No" several things will happen: first, he will look upon me as one of the Ancient Sages, a Dispenser of Esoteric Knowledge so deep that mortal man cannot hope to understand it, only ponder and reflect and meditate upon its true meaning. Trust me - BS like that goes far in the martial arts world.
Second, it will give him a clue, a vital hint, that the world is not black and white; that it is in fact many, many shades of gray (No references to poorly-written pseudo-erotica bestsellers, please). He will intuit that whether or not he enters that tournament doesn't really matter; it is the PROCESS, not the END RESULT, that matters. This frees his mind and allows him to transcend such materialistic bounds.
Did I mention that it makes me look as cool as a cat's ass on an iceberg? It does.
"Yes and No" is not just limited to the martial arts world, either: think of all the uses you could find for this phrase. When your husband asks if you want to go out to dinner this Saturday, tell him "Yes and No" - this will keep him guessing, always a good thing to do with husbands (it's their natural state and they feel uncomfortable with solid plans). When you go to church on Sunday and the Reverend asks if there are any sinners among you, stand up and proudly yell "Yes and No!" - you'll be sure to be the talk of the town for weeks to come!
Here are just a few more of the almost infinite possibilities for this wonderful Answer ...
- When the judge asks you "Do you plead guilty or not guilty?"
- When your wife asks "Do you love me?"
- When your teenager asks "Are drugs bad?"
- When Santa asks "Have you been a good boy/girl this year?"
