Your Obituary Photo

I'm going to be cremated. If others want, they can celebrate my life with an upbeat party, playing my favourite R&B songs, smiles and laughter.
 
I don't get the paper, but if an obit shows up in the news feed on my phone I sometimes look at it, I always wish they'd say what the person died of, I guess I'm nosy that way.
When my mother died my daughter made a youtube video of pictures of grandma from her being a baby on through all stages of her life. It only has four likes, so either we didn't tell people about it or there just aren't many people left. At least there aren't any dislikes, ha ha. I like to watch it every once in a while.
So I guess maybe I'd like a video of me on YouTube. Might be nice if it was made ahead of time so I could critique it. I'm sure there are a couple pictures of my mom that she would have objected to. Grandchildren just aren't critical about how grandma looks.
 

A funeral isn't for the dead, it's a recognised ceremony that gives the deceased's friends and family closure. I wouldn't want my photo displayed unless it was one like Tony's. But as I will be no more, there's not a lot that I can do about it.

One funeral that was as close to a happy event as it's possible to get was that of our darling friend, Lorraine, whose stage name was Miss Memphis Belle. She suffered pancreatic cancer and survived just the three months the medics predicted. In that time she married her life long partner, my wife made her wedding dress and the reception was just amazing. A month later and we all mourned her.

She was given a secular funeral, at her own request. Her coffin was another choice she made, it was a wicker basket and she was buried in a woodland cemetery. We all miss her still.

Here she is singing: Requiem For a Soldier, at a D-Day reunion.
 
When my mother in law died, there were 8 people at the service because she had outlived all her friends and family.
When my wife died, since we had no children or close relatives, I had her cremated. I took a kayak out into the Pacific near a place we spent all our anniversaries and scattered her ashes at sea. I have the exact coordinates as I wish to be scattered there also.
Her parents had a family plot back east. I called the cemetery to find out what it would cost to bury her ashes there. Well they gave me a spiel about an urn, a vault, digging the hole and covering it, etc for $1500!
That did not include the cost of me flying there. The question was, who would I be doing it for? Her parents were gone, and she had no living relatives in the area to visit the site. At least I can go near where her ashes were scattered out here.
 
Oh please, no photos! I absolutely hate having my picture taken. The last one I was okay with was my senior picture in our high school year book. I'm okay with the obit, but my son & grandsons know this tired old body is to be cremated and ashes spread in the Pacific Ocean near the Big Island.
 
Seeing as we're on the topic of "death," I would like to share a little bit of my history with you:

‘Twas when I was a good Convent girl, back in the 1940s, with many rules to follow. One was, “if a black wreath” was seen on the front door of a house, even if you didn’t know the family, it was your duty to go in and kneel on the kneeler to pay your respects and say a prayer for the soul of the dead person lying in wake. In those days, a deceased person’s remains would be placed in a wooden coffin in the living room, with many huge flowering plants about them. (To this day, I can still bring back the smell of those flowers to memory!) Seeing as I had to walk half a mile from our house to the Convent, I passed a few houses and visited a few corpses over my formative years, which, I must say, left me in good stead, as I have never been afraid of, or freaked out by, dead people--or animals, etc., for that matter... fringe benefits of growing up in the 1940s Canada, with the War on!
 
Jules said:
My mother was adamant that she hated seeing a photo of someone in their early years rather than a fairly recent one. This is how people know you.

A friend’s memorial picture popped up. She was 40 or 50 years younger. We nearly deleted the email because we though it was a hoax.

What would you expect for yourself or someone you’re writing about?

I can’t even see any reason for a youthful photo. Even if your children remembered you like that, they would have stronger memories as you aged.
Click to expand...
Seeing as past relatives (I call them "the outlaws") are out of touch with me, probably believing I have already passed on...(I am pretty well the only one that has moved around the Country)...if a photo was necessary, I would have no qualms about the following photo being sent on, seeing as I am this little old lady in her eighties, with long, snow white hair and who loves horses, laughing all the way! They would probably think I was bananas!
Old Women riding horses 1.jpg
 
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