Your thoughts:"A Friend to All is a Friend to None"~Aristotle

Lara

Lara

Friend of the Arts
Location
Mid-Atlantic Coast
I used this quote for advice to someone in business who is trying to take on too many new clients. They're all ticked off at him for not getting their jobs done on time because he's over-booked with a long wait list. He says he always "wants to be friendly to everyone". He even throws in free extras to be nice that take more of his time. And if those malfunction he's responsible to fix them, adding more time.

He said he disagreed with "A friend to all is a friend to none". Do you? What does this quote mean to you?
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Lara said:
I used this quote for advice to someone in business who is trying to take on too many new clients. They're all ticked off at him for not getting their jobs done on time because he's over-booked with a long wait list. He says he always "wants to be friendly to everyone". He even throws in free extras to be nice that take more of his time. And if those malfunction he's responsible to fix them, adding more time.

He said he disagreed with "A friend to all is a friend to none". Do you? What does this quote mean to you?
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Kindness is often mistaken for weakness.. and people will use you as such ... I've learned that to my own cost unfortunately
 

He finally turned down a job and referred the person to someone else to do it. She said thank you and left. Two days later she was back and said she would wait. So I asked him....

"And why do you think she returned?" She returned, I said, because your prices are low and your work is the best...and you won't raise your prices because you want to be "nice"....but there's nothing nice about ticking all your other customers off for adding more of a workload when you can't get theirs done.

Everyone else is raising their prices with all the inflation going on today.
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I think Aristotle may have had other meanings for his quote though.

There are genuine friendships and then there are those we should be kind to...but at a distance...being wary. For instance, some people can be two-faced, overly negative, toxic, attention hungry, self-centered, jealous, evil, or users as @hollydolly mentioned. They aren't your friend in my opinion.
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I think it's a fine goal to be friendly towards everyone.

I agree that it's not possible to please everyone.

One example that infuriates me is when I have an appointment to get my hair cut, eye exam, etc... and the person before me is late but they take them anyway just to be nice and end up punishing me and other customers for being on time.
 
It depends on your definition of a friend and the degree of such. I think the statement "A Friend to All is a Friend to None" is too broad. (sorry Aristotle)
 
I think the saying means that if you try to be friends with everyone you meet or know , you will have so many friends that you won't be able to be a close friend to just a few. Even the few that think you are their best friend will be somewhat in doubt of your sincerity.
 
I don't know what Aristotle meant but I would say if the person trying to be friendly to all is in business then he or she needs to learn how to delegate authority so more could get done and more people would be satisfied.
 
oldman said:
I think the saying means that if you try to be friends with everyone you meet or know , you will have so many friends that you won't be able to be a close friend to just a few. Even the few that think you are their best friend will be somewhat in doubt of your sincerity.
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Well said, om!
 
Aristotle may have had this "friend" in mind:

A person who wants to be liked by everyone so much they are unwilling to draw boundaries on deplorable behavior for fear of upsetting or offending anyone. They don't want to compromise their friend base, so much so, that they are willing to compromise their integrity.

So they tolerate unacceptable behavior toward themselves and toward all others, dismissing their lack of backbone as just being "friendly". It's not. It's weakness and lack of focus on their values. Not standing up for their real friends is being "a friend to none".
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”A friend to all is a friend to none.” In that example the person has spread themselves too thin to be a real friend to anyone.

As for your friend who is in business. Friend and business need to be separated. Be nice, but run your business as a business.
 
I actually recommended this book I read
to my friend, "The Art of Assertiveness"
He ordered it from Amazon, delivered the
the next day. Hopefully this helps. There are
3 versions though so I hope this is the one
I read decades ago (can't remember the
cover design but seems I'd remember this red!)
51mxKcPw6yL._SX311_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg
 
Aunt Bea said:
I think it's a fine goal to be friendly towards everyone.

I agree that it's not possible to please everyone.

One example that infuriates me is when I have an appointment to get my hair cut, eye exam, etc... and the person before me is late but they take them anyway just to be nice and end up punishing me and other customers for being on time.
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...and the upshot of that is that the customers who arrived on time and then are made to wait will find another supplier to go to.. and the first one will lose much more than he gained ...
 
I think when a person tries to be a friend to all they have trouble with one on one relationships. They're like crowd whores needing to be loved by everybody to the exclusion of best or closest friends. I had a friend like this once and that's another take on what Aristotle may have meant maybe.
 

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