First-World Problems: TV Edition #1 - Sunsetter Awnings

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SifuPhil

R.I.P. With Us In Spirit Only
Location
Pennsylvania, USA
Never before have I seen such an avalanche of solutions for non-problems as I have lately on cable television.

These are the types of problems that only well-fed, well-bred and well-off Americans could possible have, and it sickens me to think of all the wonderful things that COULD be sold, but are not, that could truly help less-fortunate people.

Case in point - Item #1 - Sunsetter Awnings

The commercial for this motorized patio awning starts with a fine whine and progresses rapidly into the epitome of laziness and entitlement:


You poor, poor things ... you have an outdoor patio on your McMansion that the Sun has the gall to shine upon! You need to be PROTECTED from those harmful rays! Thank goodness for Sunsetter Awnings!

I am also relieved to hear that I can get my very own Sunsetter for as little as $399 with their limited-time $200-Off coupon. I don't quite get the math here, because the cheapest model awning is $699 retail - $200 off of that is $499, yet in the video they mention that you can get your Sunsetter Awning for as little as $399. Do they throw a Benjamin at you in the showroom? Is there an unadvertised special I'm not aware of? Of course, the don't specify which model this coupon applies to. I get the distinct impression it only applies to the "Starter" model ...

umbrella_234.jpg

In reality, Sunsetter's awning range in price from $699 to $2,999. This covers widths of from 7 to 20 feet in any of three different fabrics and whether you choose the motorized option or not. But Heaven forbid you get a NON-motorized version - you'd actually have to STAND there and CRANK THE HANDLE WITH YOUR HANDS, as if you were just another regular person!

Ah, BUT THAT'S NOT ALL! They don't mention it in the commercial, but there is a veritable avalanche of add-ons you can get with your awning, no doubt strongly suggested by some pimply-faced 18-year-old "product engineering representative". You can add such hard-to-do-without wonders as protective aluminum hoods (without which I am sure your new awning will be mercilessly shredded by ravenous birds that love the sun), patio lights, awning covers, weatherbreaker panels, cleaning kits, Sunsetter mats and even a wireless wind sensor, I guess for those times the missus makes her 3-Bean Salad.

And of course, if you are above mere manual labor in all its ugly forms you'll want to contact your friendly local Sunsetter distributor to arrange for the installation of your new awning. Otherwise, you'd be stuck for at least 2-3 hours holding nasty, dirty tools and getting cobwebs all over your Izod shirt!

Sunsetter Awnings ... for the entitled American!
 
As long as they're buying 'em with their own money, what's the beef?! You could say the same for all sorts of consumer items! And those ads help keep the awning makers employed!

The beef for me is when OTHERS have to buy the niceties for people who don't buy their own. And sadly, that's the entitlement that's becoming all too common.

If one is spending one's own money, one IS entitled to do with it as one pleases. God bless America!

Nice rant, though, Phil. Very passionate!
 
FishWisher..you of course, are right about one being entitled to spend their own money on what ever one wants. My heartburn with this commercial is that it's so phoney, and as Phil pointed out the false price advertising come on.

Using high profile people to lure buyers in also rubs me raw, as I am quite sure that the Edwards' do not have this POS awning on their million $ + home. In the commercial why don't they show Edward's wife raising the awning on her own patio if indeed it is even there and it's so easy, instead of panning to some unrelated person in the video demonstrating it.

These types of phony baloney commercials with famous people do not entice me to buy their products, but shun them.

:soap2:
 
SifuPhil said:
. . . it sickens me to think of all the wonderful things that COULD be sold, but are not, that could truly help less-fortunate people.
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Little is sold to the less fortunate because they have no disposable income. Of course, there are all those legal loan sharks getting them deeper and deeper in debt. And, then, there's all those beyond desperate criminals trying to make a dishonest living...
 
I find nothing wrong with one spending their money on whatever they chose. But, it's often just disgusting. How many solid gold toilet seats does one really need? Really!
 
For everyone that expressed concern that I want to take away your God-given right to waste your money on junk, fear not - that is not my goal. (And if you contest my use of the term "junk" in regards to this fine American-made product, just do a Google search on "Sunsetter Awning reviews")

Nor am I so foolhardy as to believe that poor people will be buying aforementioned junk from TV. No, what I meant in that regard was that perhaps they should sell something that would be of use to the poorer class, at an affordable price - something along the lines of a book about getting jobs in the new economy instead of giving up and watching TrueTV all day, or how to get off welfare without having to give up your new car, or how to tell if your kid is in a gang when he hangs around with kids named "Killer" and "9mm". You know - the simple things, the things that many Americans have forgotten. The things that used to be taken for granted, but rapidly went from known-by-all to unknown-to-anyone.

Yeah, Fish, God bless America - because the elected officials that make promises sure aren't going to do it, nor are the sheeple that elected them. They're happy with their bundled phone/Internet/cable packages, their smart phones and their Okinawa Life pills - they don't WANT to be bothered trying to bless America. They just want to take what everyone else already has.

And yes, I'm passionate on certain subjects - must be the Italian in me. Just think how hard it is to do hand signs while I'm typing! :D

That Guy, yes, I suppose I misspoke when I said sell stuff to poor people - that's like carrying coals to Newcastle. Like I said in the earlier paragraph, maybe they should try selling something that's useful to the poor people (the great, unwashed masses) instead of just the rich. It makes good business sense as well: it's easier to sell 1,000 units at $0.99 than it is to sell 10 units at $99. Amazon proves this regularly with their ebooks - their biggest sellers are those priced under $2.99, while the big-name titles get all the glory and the press. It looks impressive when a Harry Potter hardcover sells for $25, but the number of sales compared to the cheaper ebook version is shockingly small.

And don't forget that's just for the big names - usually less than 0.0001% of the entire available book catalog.

So volume selling should be something that is practiced more often, and as my next post in this series will show it IS, but the quality of the product still leaves much to be desired.

Ozarkgal said:
These types of phony baloney commercials with famous people do not entice me to buy their products, but shun them.
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That's something I hope to address in yet another future post - the ethics of using familiar/famous faces to sell crappola. We've grown to trust them, to think of them as one of the family ... then they turn around and lend their "authority" to shoddy merchandise or out-and-out scams.

That Guy said:
Oh, and not to worry, Phil. The US of A seems to headed toward 3rd World status any day now...
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Agreed. That's why I've already submitted my portfolio to be the UN's official poster-child.

Phil-as-Owl-2.jpg
 
There really isn't going to be a middle class in the future, is there?? Either you're with the 'elite', or you're poor, possibly on gov't help, maybe not wanting to work even if there are jobs available, because you can survive just fine on all the things you get for free, because you're 'entitled' to it. Where on earth did this mindset come from??? Since when do we have to have all this 'stuff' and not think it takes work to get something??

Guess that's a bit OT, but good grief. I don't give a hoot what celebrity is selling something, or if they have it. Not much respect for Hollywood types around here, for sure.
 
I dunno what all the whining over commercials is about. Nobody is bound and gagged by some Wall Street type and forced to watch... or maybe some are!!

What do y'all watch? I see more commercials for Cadillacs, Lincolns, other fine cars than I do awnings, etc. Maybe not enough of us are watching the financial programs?! Commercials are a fine indicator of the market segment any given program is trying to reach.

Anne - here's the finest explanation of the entitlement minded whiners I've ever seen. It explains it very well: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OAOrT0OcHh0

And yes, Phil... we await your next posts with bated breath! (In my case, baited breath.)
 
Fishwisher, I do agree with some of what he's saying. Coddling the younger generations haven't done them any good, and maybe the only thing that will, is if/when we do hit third-world country status....or will that just make them angry and go around demanding what some still have??
I remember reading about some teens who came across two men who had been badly hurt in a snowmobile accident. They did all the right things; one left to get help; another called 911, and they waited for help to arrive. Some time later, the town had a huge ceremony for the teens, recognizing them as 'heroes'. I thought, "what?? They did what any human being should do; get help for someone who is hurt, and they are heroes"??? I don't think kids should be rewarded for doing something that's noble or right...whether it's getting good grades, or helping someone. These are just things one should be brought up to do; don't expect rewards for everything.
Losing in a sport is fine...your self-esteem is not going to suffer because you're not the best, and you don't need a reward or medal for trying your best.

As far as stupid commercials, yes, some people will buy anything, and if it's their money, fine...they can find out later that it's probably something they didn't need, or it's junk and falls apart soon after they buy it. Even so, some commercials bug me....I usually end up muting those, and just watch the funny ones.
I
 
Anne said:
I remember reading about some teens who came across two men who had been badly hurt in a snowmobile accident. They did all the right things; one left to get help; another called 911, and they waited for help to arrive. Some time later, the town had a huge ceremony for the teens, recognizing them as 'heroes'. I thought, "what?? They did what any human being should do; get help for someone who is hurt, and they are heroes"??? I don't think kids should be rewarded for doing something that's noble or right...whether it's getting good grades, or helping someone. These are just things one should be brought up to do; don't expect rewards for everything.
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Because of today's morals (or better yet, the lack of them) I guess the guy was lucky they didn't knock him over the head, steal his wallet and part out the snowmobile. This practice of rewarding kids for doing what should be expected behavior establishes their sense of entitlement as they grow up. Then they become angry, non-motivated adults when they discover the reality of a world that does not revolve around their happy ass, and acknowledge their awesomeness.

They say our generation is to blame for creating this situation by handing the kids what ever they wanted without making them appreciate what it takes to earn something.
 
FishWisher said:
I dunno what all the whining over commercials is about. Nobody is bound and gagged by some Wall Street type and forced to watch... or maybe some are!!
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I didn't realize I was whining - I'll try to lower the tone so that it comes out as a more guttural moan.

And no, no one is forced to watch - THAT type of sublimation has proven ineffective. It's the constant low-level exposure, the whispered suggestion, the psy-op, that converts the masses.

What do y'all watch? I see more commercials for Cadillacs, Lincolns, other fine cars than I do awnings, etc. Maybe not enough of us are watching the financial programs?! Commercials are a fine indicator of the market segment any given program is trying to reach.
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I don't really WATCH TV as much as use it to drown out the background static of my environment. Usually the channel is set for MeTV, which is an "oldies" station playing shows from the '60's and '70's.

So you watch the financial programs ... that makes sense they would sell Lincolns and Cadillacs - big, resource-consuming, expensive luxury vehicles - to a segment that plays off the illusion that is the market. "I drive a Lincoln so I must have wealth" is the signal sent in those commercials - hardly a more noble or honest meme than cheap awnings. It's just a dead fish dressed up in a mink coat.

But in that particular "club" a luxury car is de rigeur, perhaps as a motorized awning is just another way for Joe Average to stay ahead of his neighbors.

Yet just like the market, you can invest in those cars and have them disappear the next day at the end of a tow-truck's hook. They are an illusion - they do not MAKE a person what they ARE - they merely reflect what a person wants to BE. Like any other demographic, the rich have their pressure-points that Madison Avenue gladly exploits.

There's a reason Madison Avenue ends well before Wall Street - they want a lot of defensive space between them and their victims.

And yes, Phil... we await your next posts with bated breath! (In my case, baited breath.)
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Ah ... therein lies the hook. ;)
 
SifuPhil said:
So you watch the financial programs ... that makes sense they would sell Lincolns and Cadillacs - big, resource-consuming, expensive luxury vehicles - to a segment that plays off the illusion that is the market. "I drive a Lincoln so I must have wealth" is the signal sent in those commercials - hardly a more noble or honest meme than cheap awnings. It's just a dead fish dressed up in a mink coat.

But in that particular "club" a luxury car is de rigeur, perhaps as a motorized awning is just another way for Joe Average to stay ahead of his neighbors.

Yet just like the market, you can invest in those cars and have them disappear the next day at the end of a tow-truck's hook. They are an illusion - they do not MAKE a person what they ARE - they merely reflect what a person wants to BE. Like any other demographic, the rich have their pressure-points that Madison Avenue gladly exploits.

There's a reason Madison Avenue ends well before Wall Street - they want a lot of defensive space between them and their victims.
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Victims?! Geez. I guess it's a matter of perspective. I see the system as a very efficient way of meeting the needs of consumers. You seem to see it exploiting those who take part. A guy driving a Lexus or a guy driving an old Escort, both need to get somewhere. If one can enjoy comfort and style in the process, that's great all around, I think. And the guy driving the Lexus is helping make more jobs, to boot. I don't see anyone being exploited - I see 'em being helped to get where they want to go. Appreciating instead of denigrating the system is less stressful I reckon.
 
FishWisher said:
Victims?! Geez. I guess it's a matter of perspective. I see the system as a very efficient way of meeting the needs of consumers. You seem to see it exploiting those who take part. A guy driving a Lexus or a guy driving an old Escort, both need to get somewhere. If one can enjoy comfort and style in the process, that's great all around, I think. And the guy driving the Lexus is helping make more jobs, to boot. I don't see anyone being exploited - I see 'em being helped to get where they want to go. Appreciating instead of denigrating the system is less stressful I reckon.
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Well, okay, "victims" might be a bit too much. :eek:

The guy driving the Lexus is providing jobs, alright - at all 6 plants in Japan and the one in Ontario. :cool:

Appreciation vs. denigration ... I see your point, and it IS all in one's perspective. Mine is from minimalism, from being "outside the system" and "under the radar" - imagine a 55-year-old hippie still flashing two-fingered "peace" signs and not trusting anyone under 30 ...

I've been in both the establishment and anti-establishment worlds throughout my life - I've been stabbed in the back far fewer times, and made deeper, more meaningful friendships, in the latter.

I go with what I know. :D
 
My hubby pointed out the guy in the sunsetter TV commercial, about how he exaggerated his movements of how hot the sun was, and how hot we felt in the sun, etc. We both laughed and mused over other commercials...like the litter-box screen that makes changing your cat box so much neater. Of course they had a super clumsy gal who was spilling litter all over the place.

Then there's the pasta drainer in the pot, where they show the woman spilling boiling hot water and spaghetti all over the place, the water softner infomercial where the guy is holding a huge bag of salt that breaks open all over the floor, and on and on. :p
 
SeaBreeze said:
My hubby pointed out the guy in the sunsetter TV commercial, about how he exaggerated his movements of how hot the sun was, and how hot we felt in the sun, etc. We both laughed and mused over other commercials...like the litter-box screen that makes changing your cat box so much neater. Of course they had a super clumsy gal who was spilling litter all over the place.
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Right? You'd think they were doing legitimate theatre, not TV!

Then there's the pasta drainer in the pot, where they show the woman spilling boiling hot water and spaghetti all over the place, the water softner infomercial where the guy is holding a huge bag of salt that breaks open all over the floor, and on and on. :p
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Excellent examples. My favorite so far is the guy who barely puts a Q-tip into his ear and screams like he's being murdered. :playful:

q-tip-guy.jpg
 
LOL Phil! :playful: I think that was the notorious 'wax vac' commercial. We laughed at that one too, never quite screamed like that when using a q-tip. :p
 
SeaBreeze said:
LOL Phil! :playful: I think that was the notorious 'wax vac' commercial. We laughed at that one too, never quite screamed like that when using a q-tip. :p
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Yeah, now if I ran into a wall sideways while I had it in there, or it had a glowing coal on the end of it I could understand the reaction, but even William Shatner doesn't emote THAT badly! :D
 
It's interesting you bring that up, Anne, because I was thinking about it ever since I saw the commercial.

It LOOKS like it would be a useful thing, IF the cutter works as they claim. But as you said, I find it hard to believe that it would cut plastic wrap that easily. Foil, sure; waxed paper, maybe; but based upon becoming entangled in a web of plastic wrap many times I can attest that the stuff is just EVIL!

Something I've found to be true more times than not concerning TV items - if you read the reviews on THEIR site you're going to see nothing but glowing, rave reviews, but if you go to someplace like Amazon you're more likely to find honest opinions.

For WrapTastic, as an example, their site has 50 reviews - oddly enough, all from May - that sing the praises of the gizmo. Not a single complaint in the bunch.

Go to Amazon's reviews of the same product, however, and you'll find a very different story - 66% of the reviewers gave it one star or less, and only 14% gave it 5 stars, the rest falling equally in the middle range.
 
SifuPhil said:
It's interesting you bring that up, Anne, because I was thinking about it ever since I saw the commercial.

It LOOKS like it would be a useful thing, IF the cutter works as they claim. But as you said, I find it hard to believe that it would cut plastic wrap that easily. Foil, sure; waxed paper, maybe; but based upon becoming entangled in a web of plastic wrap many times I can attest that the stuff is just EVIL!

Something I've found to be true more times than not concerning TV items - if you read the reviews on THEIR site you're going to see nothing but glowing, rave reviews, but if you go to someplace like Amazon you're more likely to find honest opinions.

For WrapTastic, as an example, their site has 50 reviews - oddly enough, all from May - that sing the praises of the gizmo. Not a single complaint in the bunch.

Go to Amazon's reviews of the same product, however, and you'll find a very different story - 66% of the reviewers gave it one star or less, and only 14% gave it 5 stars, the rest falling equally in the middle range.
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YES!!! I always check somewhere like Amazon or just type in "reviews for _____" and a lot of sites will come up that you can check out for the product. I see a lot of kitchen gadgets that look good, but so many times they are reported as breaking, or just being another thing that ends up sitting in a drawer since it's not as useful as it looks.
 
"The percentage you're paying is too high priced
While you're living beyond all your means
And the man in the suit has just bought a new car
From the profit he's made on your dreams
But today you just read that the man was shot dead
By a gun that didn't make any noise
But it wasn't the bullet that laid him to rest was
The low spark of high-heeled boys" -- Traffic

- - - Updated - - -

"Pretty soon now
Y'know I'm gonna make a comeback
And like the birds and the bees in the trees
It's a sure-fire smash
I'll speak
To the masses throughout the media
And if you got anything to say to me
You can say it with cash
'Cause I got the trash and you got the cash
So baby we should get along fine
So give me all your money 'cause I know you think I'm funny
Can't you hear me laughing
Can't you see me smile

I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the hula-hoop
I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the yo-yo

Kung fu
That was one of my good ones
Well what's a few broken bones
When we all know it's good clean fun
Skateboards
I've almost made them respectable
You see I can't always get through to you
So I go for your son
I had a giant rubber shark and it really made a mark
Didja looka looka lookit alla blood
Give me all your money 'cause I know you think I'm funny
Can't you hear me laughing
Can't you see me smile

I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the hula-hoop
I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the yo-yo

Right now
I think I'm gonna plan a new trend
Because the line on the graph's getting low
And we can't have that
And you think you're immune
But I can sell you anything
Anything from a thin safety pin
To a pork pie hat
'Cause I got the trash and you got the cash
So baby we should get along fine
So give me all your money 'cause I know you think I'm funny
Can't you hear me laughing
Can't you see me smile

I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the hula-hoop
I'm the man
I'm the man that gave you the yo-yo" -- Joe Jackson
 
I've always thought it a bit ironic that the folks that sing about these things make royalties on the songs ...

Even Pink Floyd, one of my favorite groups, pretended to pull away the blinds from the music publishing industry with their Dark Side of the Moon album, but all it did in reality was to allow them to continue with their Jaguar-and-steak-bar lifestyles. ;)
 
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