Do You Ever Find Yourself Understanding What A Parent Said Long Ago Now?

Ruthanne

Ruthanne

Caregiver
Location
Midwest
There were some things my parents said to me I didn't know how to take. Guess I hadn't been in their shoes at that time.

Now I am finding myself understanding what my mom said to me long ago. And then I understand how she must have felt as I felt the same thing when I said the same thing to someone else.

Am I making any sense? Can anyone relate?
 

Oh yes, too many to mention!

Thankfully, I was always mature for my age... years ahead of my counterparts (my younger years), so a lot of what my folks said to me, registered, and it definitely made me a better person.

I believe there was more of it in your and my day, Ruthanne, because there was always someone home (my mom was it), so she was always there to remind me and my siblings of this and that, and not only did it help carry me through those years in a more grown-up and respectful manner, my parents words always served as a reminder to me as to how bad and quickly life could go.

Definitely allowed me to exercise caution, and made me think before I did.
 
Thanks for your reply Marg. Maturity is a good thing. I think I was, too, but took some things in a way not intended for I did not understand where she was coming from when she said certain things to me. They weren't words of caution as a youngster but rather other things when I was older but not nearly as old as I am now.
 

I've heard those before a few times! LOL! :)

Sometimes my folks would say something to me that I would occasionally question, something I hadn't heard before, account them tying it in with an old saying, and I'd always quiz them on it.

I do a reflecting of my past these days, and while some of it can get the better of me sometimes and bring me down, I try and remember things in a positive way, and always tell myself, mom and dad would be so proud of you right now, keep going, never give up, and stay strong.
 
Ruthanne said:
Thanks for your interest! Yes, it is a bit too personal for me to share the exact specifics. And I am still exploring what was going on at that time and trying to make sense of something else, too.
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I'm always here, Ruthanne, so don't hesitate in messaging me or starting a thread related to anything/everything you dream up. You can count on me to reply. :)
 
When I was younger there was a time in my life where I envied my best friend and the foods she could eat. They had the best sugar coated junk cereals, pop daily and dessert after every meal.
My parents were health conscious. We had healthy cereals like corn flakes, shredded wheat or slow cooked oats. We rarely had desserts and occasionally had pop. I can remember my parents saying that I might not like the food they bought for us but at least we have food and that later I would thank them for feeding us well. Luckily this phase only lasted a short time and it didn’t take me long to realize I was lucky to have been given healthy food choices. Some children don’t get food at all and some are homeless so being raised with good food choices was something I learned to really appreciate. There’s plenty of other stuff but I don’t want to admit to it all in one post. ☺️
 
While my parents gave me many words of wisdom that proved valuable to me, as I took on my adult world, they also said things that I found out were wrong, for me.

My Mom liked, "All things in moderation." I found that, with some things, you have to go all out, shoot for the moon, to make the effort, make the experience, worth it.

My Dad always said, "Never buy new vehicles. They lose half their value as soon as they're driven off the lot. " Nope. I buy a new truck every 2-3 years, and I never have the used vehicle blues with costly repairs, no loaners, constant tweaking. Also, on trade-ins, I'm a fierce negotiator. I never lose much value on what I'm trading in.
 
My Mom always told me.....Do the right thing, patty, or you will be going down the wrong path.... ....Be yourself....
Always, she would say, I know you can do it...I always listened to my Mom......She had a hard life as a child and a Woman....
Until she met my Dad.....I miss her so....
 
The one thing that sits with me that my parents always told me back when I was in my teens and early twenties and even throughout my adulthood was always to make it a priority to keep in touch with your parents. It may not have to be daily, but at least a few times a week just to see how they are and to let them know how you are doing. That is really hitting home with me and my husband now as my 22 year old daughter has just recently graduated college and has moved to her own place. I hope we have installed that message in her and she will check up on us as I do with my parents daily.
 
One I remember that I couldn't relate to at the time: if you start to experience hearing problems, people will act like it's your fault and like you're being difficult on purpose.
I've noticed this in person- although less of a problem these days- and it's the reason I avoid phones as much as possible. If you need to ask someone to talk louder or repeat something, you get a moment of noticeable silence, followed by an exaggerated sigh before they answer. :mad:
 

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