I just realised I can't remember my mothers' voice any more

So sorry you have lost that connection but maybe, hopefully, not forever. When I read your post I tried to "hear" my mother's voice and I can see and hear her in her rocking chair singing her favorite hymn. She died at age 89, one month short of what would have been her 90th birthday. That was 25 years ago. I see her sometimes in my dreams which always are at the house where I grew up. Dreams and memories are can be such odd things.
 

I guess that things like voicemail and such weren’t around back in the late 60’s. But I’ve saved many voicemails my mom has left me for the past several years. I use Google voice and I archive them. Not all but some for just such a scenario. I’m lucky that my mom is still living. I can remember other voices from my past but I don’t have recordings of them. Just my mom.
 

Murrmurr said:
I haven't forgotten, but my mom died only a year ago in January.

Holly, in your head, do you hear your mom's words in your voice? Maybe your voice is a lot like hers.
Click to expand...
I hear my mums words, I can even see her in my mind when she said some of those things.. but I cannot hear the sound of her voice. She had a different accent to me so our voices wouldn't be the same.
 
Chris P Bacon said:
I guess that things like voicemail and such weren’t around back in the late 60’s. But I’ve saved many voicemails my mom has left me for the past several years. I use Google voice and I archive them. Not all but some for just such a scenario. I’m lucky that my mom is still living. I can remember other voices from my past but I don’t have recordings of them. Just my mom.
Click to expand...
I do that with my daughter, save as much of her voice as I can :love:..altho' I'll go before she does.. almost certainly,.. but just in case..
 
Capt Lightning said:
I can't remember when my mother died - it must have been 25 years ago. I have no record of her voice and few photos. Occasionally I wish I had some recordings of my father who knew various 'mummers' rhymes and folk poems. Ah well, too late now.
Click to expand...
That's unusual not to know when your mother died, unless of course you hadn't previously been in contact.. that would be understandable

I know to the exact date every year , the date of my mothers' death, and on that date I have a conversation with her ..next year it will be 50 years... it's just doesn't seem possible...
 
Pepper said:
@hollydolly
I even know the day of the week and the minute of the hour that the doctor declared the end. It would be easier if I didn't.

What a shock for you. (((Holly)))
Click to expand...
Yes I know the day, and the time... it was a Thursday and she was declared to have died at 5am... although she wasn't discovered until 7.30 am.

The previous Thursday we'd had the shock of being given the news out of the blue that my paternal grandfather had died, age 73...

I have no love for my own father as most of you know and you know the reasons why.. but to lose your father and wife both unexpectedly.. in the space of 7 days , had to be a shock.. even to someone as hard hearted and evil as my father was... ..certainly it was a horrendous shock to us kids... double whammy in 7 days..
 
Kaila said:
Such a moving post. Thank you for sharing that, @hollydolly
💓💗💕
Click to expand...
It's certainly one that I can empathise with, my mother was 33 when she died, leaving Dad with four children under the age of ten. It's part of my life but one that I rarely discuss because of the emotion.

Did mother's death make my siblings and I cautious about having children of our own? Probably.
 
hollydolly said:
That's unusual not to know when your mother died, unless of course you hadn't previously been in contact.. that would be understandable

I know to the exact date every year , the date of my mothers' death, and on that date I have a conversation with her ..next year it will be 50 years... it's just doesn't seem possible...
Click to expand...
I expect that I was away on business and had to arrange trips etc.. By the time I got back everything had been arranged with a Masonic handshake. I felt like a 'spare part' at the funeral. My parents, siblings and I all walked very different paths through life. I sometimes wonder if we were related.
 
Kaila said:
@Alligatorob
Your post brought tears to my eyes. I am thankful for what you wrote.
I think that would be true. Thank you.

I cannot remember all that I dearly wish I could, regarding my loved ones.
And then, there are the ones I did not have the chance to know.
Click to expand...
It's much too sad for me to handle right now due to my own loss in 2o16 two days b4 my bday.
So sorry Holly is going through this sadness she needs a huge hug from us all.
Tape recordings I had this in mind when my daughter was 5 or less singing Annie and You are My Sunshine it was taped over a story audio that SHE had and I tried to retrieve it for she had a storage I learned later only to be overtaken by 2nd estranged daughter April sorry I did not mean to say this oh forget it.
 
My father passed away 22 years ago and I so admired him. We spent every Saturday together when I accompanied him on errands. I remember how he looked but I am also having difficulty remembering his voice. I just try to focus on his legacy.
 
Chris P Bacon said:
I guess that things like voicemail and such weren’t around back in the late 60’s. But I’ve saved many voicemails my mom has left me for the past several years. I use Google voice and I archive them. Not all but some for just such a scenario. I’m lucky that my mom is still living. I can remember other voices from my past but I don’t have recordings of them. Just my mom.
Click to expand...
My mother passed away in November 2021. She and my cousin were like mother and daughter. My cousin kept all of the voicemails she left on her phone and still listens to them to this day.

I took care of my mother for 22 years after my father passed away, so I still remember her voice quite clearly.
 
JonSR77 said:
When my wife's father passed, I found a voicemail that he had left her. So, I transferred that to a voice recorder and then to computer files, so that I could save it for her.

From that, I decided to save voicemails from my mother, who is now 94, so that when she passes I will have some recording of her voice.

Seems like a good idea, generally.

I guess video (and audio) would be even better.


And, I just videoed one of our cats. She had a cancer scare recently and I decided, I wanted to help me remember her if she does pass.
Click to expand...
Sorry that @hollydolly doesn't remember her mother's voice. I have taped my mom's voice. I asked her to recite her poems to me and she did. People have told me that I sound just like my mother.
 
dseag2 said:
My father passed away 22 years ago and I so admired him. We spent every Saturday together when I accompanied him on errands. I remember how he looked but I am also having difficulty remembering his voice. I just try to focus on his legacy.
Click to expand...
Aren't those memories precious, @dseag2? I remember my father's voice. It was deep and mellow. I loved his voice.
 
I believe it is normal to forget what deceased parents' voices sound like. I think it is a form of self-defense. Just imagine being out somewhere and hearing someone talking in the same voice that your parents had. I think lots of people would totally freak out.
 
That's sad Holly. Years ago I started transferring loved ones' voices from the answering machine to a recorder. Don't remember how I did it but they wound up in my iTunes, so I will have their voices forever. I recorded my mom, godmother, the young lady who finally became my DIL with my two oldest grandchildren, each when they were toddlers...she called to have them "talk" to me. :D Little did I know that I'd have to listen to those recordings to hear her voice again! 😢I also have my son, late husband and a few friends as well. I have more voices that I need to transfer to digital format. I still remember my mother's voice without having to listen to the recording.
 
I was blessed to have video and voice recordings of my Mom, My Parents InLaw, and my husband. I guess the thing that has bothered me most is losing my husband's smell. So many people have told me a person does not have a scent. I disagree, a person does have a scent unique to only them.

It was there the first time he hugged me at 15, it was there the day he died, I had kissed him and went to grab some lunch, he left when I was in the hospital cafeteria. Of course, it was in the house. In our bed, his pillow, his jackets etc. The biggest place was his truck, I would sit in the garage, in the truck for hours. His scent lasted there for over a year. Family would ask are you going to the sell the truck, how could I, it was the only place I still had the scent of him.
 
I was looking for a warm pair of socks a few days ago when it got cold here and came across a pair of my late mother's wool socks that I brought home from her house.

I was so excited to find them that I said, "Yes, Mama, I'm putting on some socks!". I could hear her in my head telling me my feet were cold and to put on some socks. I could hear her voice.

When Mama said your feet were cold, we didn't argue.....it was just easier to go put on some socks.
 
Whenever I'm going through a bad time.. sometimes I will see tiny white feathers scattered around my garden, and to me that means my mum is sending a message telling me she's there, that whatever happens will be ok.. or that she's there watching over it..

The other day.. I was feeling very sorry for myself.. several things had happened during the day to upset me, and it culminated in me falling so hard I broke a door, and really hurt my back... :(.. I was on the point of tears, really feeling sorry for myself, and was muttering out loud under my breath...why me..what have I done to deserve this....?..

FF to the following morning.. and I was getting dressed, and reached out for my jumper.. (sweater)>. and right there in prominent position was a white feather ..IN the House !!..On my Jumper !!
Never has there been a white feather IN my house, much less right there on my clothes.. so I absolutely believe it was my mum saying.. don't worry you're not alone..I'm here.. and all will be well. 🥰
 
hollydolly said:
I absolutely believe it was my mum saying.. don't worry you're not alone..I'm here.. and all will be well. 🥰
Click to expand...
In my early teens, still at pains with the loss of mother, I was told a tale about a child who cried herself to sleep ever since her mother died. On this particular night she had an amazing visionary dream. She saw this column of people moving slowly, each held a large candle, the sort you see on a church alter. They were all in song, the singing was beautiful, the whole image, heartwarming.

The child noticed, as the column passed by, that some of the choristers had unlit candles, she was puzzled by this. Then to her joy she saw her mother. "Mummy!" She called, her mother smiled back. The child immediately caught sight of her mother's unlit candle. Looking at her mother, she simply said, "why?"

"My darling child," her mother replied, "I am here now, and you must live your life, cherish my memory and be brave." "But Mummy, why is you candle not lit?" "It's hard for me to say this," her mother said, "but every time that you weep for me, your tears put my candle out."

It's been 67 years since my mother passed, there are still occasions when I put her candle out, I just can't help it. But the emotional release is better than the stiff upper lip, I'm sure mother understands.
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top