What do you/did you admire about your parents?

Don't understand that one. I am not Italian but spent a lot of time in Italy, very nice looking people. Beautiful women for sure.
American/Italian gangsters of the prohibition era were all impeccably dressed with immaculate hairstyles. The wayward strands of hair were slicked down with hair oil that went by the names of "Brilliantine." There were many other hair brands that were popular of the period. Can you recognise actor Gary Cooper, portraying such a character?
Gary-Cooper.jpg
 

I loved my parents, and I believe they loved me, though you wouldn't exactly call my dad gushy, but it was a different era. I think they did the best they could, worked hard, and taught me by example all those qualities that sometimes seem in short supply today, honesty, honor, empathy, and a thrist for knowledge. Mike
Unfortunately, as some of us can attest, those good qualities were in just as short a supply in some cases--like in our own families--back then as they are now. I think maybe people tried to hide more of it back then. I think it might be better that it comes out more often now since it's been proven that repressing too much bad emotional stuff is bad for people (except socio/psychopaths, of course).
 
My mother came to visit me when I moved to Colorado and while here, I noticed she was reading Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged. I had no idea what it was about, but had heard of it. I actually thought it was well respected literature.

My mother came to visit me a few years later and I remember her sitting next to me, still reading Atlas Shrugged. She made sure I knew what she was reading. WTF? I still had no idea what it was about but I thought it strange that she was reading the same book. I wondered, although not out loud, if that was the only book she owned.

Since that time, I've gotten interested in politics and learned about Ayn Rand's Objectivist philosophy. She was a nasty person and a hypocrite, but I won't get into that here.

My mother died a few years ago. I wonder if she ever finished her book.
 

Unfortunately, as some of us can attest, those good qualities were in just as short a supply in some cases--like in our own families--back then as they are now. I think maybe people tried to hide more of it back then. I think it might be better that it comes out more often now since it's been proven that repressing too much bad emotional stuff is bad for people (except socio/psychopaths, of course).
It was a different time ... i wonder if it is all in a perspective.
I have known friends and family tell such glorious stories of a parent that passed.

i am left dumb founded ......as i was aware of a whole different story............... either by witnessing it or opposite stories told to me from the same person now painting such a lovely picture
 
This reminded me of my daughters MIL. Because I am Italian she thought my daughter wouldn't look good at the wedding. She wanted to come and help my daughter pick out her wedding gown. She even sent me a picture of a dress she thought I should wear. The day of the wedding she made her daughter come early to check on how bad my daughter would look. Do you think my daughter looked like a Greaseball? (Her definition of Italians)



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I think she is beautiful!
 
I fortunately was raised by my paternal grandparents. Grandpa had a very rough childhood and he was quiet for the most part. He adored grandma and no one had better disrespect her, that was the only thing that seemed to anger him. Grandma never said she loved me, but I know she did. I have missed her everyday of my life since she left us in 1975 she was 85. She probably didn't know how grateful I was to have her be my grandma.
 
A little dab will do ya. Mike

American/Italian gangsters of the prohibition era were all impeccably dressed with immaculate hairstyles. The wayward strands of hair were slicked down with hair oil that went by the names of "Brilliantine." There were many other hair brands that were popular of the period. Can you recognise actor Gary Cooper, portraying such a character?
 
American/Italian gangsters of the prohibition era were all impeccably dressed with immaculate hairstyles. The wayward strands of hair were slicked down with hair oil that went by the names of "Brilliantine." There were many other hair brands that were popular of the period. Can you recognise actor Gary Cooper, portraying such a character?
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Yeah, their hair always had that look in movies.
James-Cagney-Movies-Ranked
 
Since this thread continues and we are introducing our extended families, I'll add this...

Father's side:
My grandfather was a carousing alcoholic who later found religion and used to deliver pies and cakes to neighbors in his old age. He became a very good man in his later years. His name is on one of the bricks in the First Baptist Church in his town. He always gave me a Silver Dollar when I visited him and took me with him when he painted houses. I only saw the good side of him.

His carousing had already driven my grandmother crazy. She was nothing short of psychotic and she would say horrible things to my mother and never treated her well. She used to sit me on her lap and tell me how I would go off to war and be killed. (Nice!) One funny memory... She wore lots of powder and my grandfather used to say "you look like you just dipped your head in a flour barrel." She later developed Alzheimer's disease and passed away in a nursing home. Perhaps what I experienced was the early stages of this horrible disease.

Mother's side:
My grandmother contracted rheumatic fever and passed away from heart disease when I was very young.

My grandfather got remarried to a woman that was at least 20 years younger. Growing up, his children always fought for his attention because he wanted it that way. They were so competitive that none of them were close. My mother got close to her brothers as they got older, but when her sister passed away she didn't even care. She hated her sister because she went to college. My grandfather put my step-grandmother through hell, demanding that she cater to his every whim, especially in his declining years... and she did it until she was completely worn out. He was good to me, but I saw how he treated his wife. Talk about a dysfunctional family.:(

So, my father had to grow up with these parents, and two alcoholic brothers, and was able to rise above it all. I have so much admiration for him. I'm not sure I could have done the same. My mother had very little chance from the start because she came from a dysfunctional family and married into one. I admire her for doing the best she could under the circumstances.

I'm happy to be a relatively normal, caring person. I chose my own path.
 
I grew up with parents who raised me in the church and expected me to have certain values that were representative of a proper girl. I tried my best to live up to those standards , but no one is ever perfect for sure, but one thing I remember about my parents while growing up and as a teen is they trusted me. I think this is because the entrenched in me these values and that is what they really thought I strive to be at all times. I was a good kid and teen for sure so I did not let them down, but not perfect and when I did make mistakes I would get a good talking to, but the trust still was there. I really appreciated that in my parents.
 
They didn't have any bad habits (alcohol, drugs, etc). Didn't punish without a reason and when they did, explained what the reason was. Mother didn't work and was a stay-at-home parent. Dad worked, sometimes double shifts, to make enough to support a wife and child - at a pay scale that was probably much less than the minimum wage is today.
 
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What do you/did you admire about your parents?

Oh yes, I used to look up to both parents, in fact I had to crane my neck, because their faces were so far away, then after eating my porridge for a long time like a good boy, I sort of grew and grew, then, I had to crane my neck to look down to them, because they had somehow .......shrunk. 😊
 
Mom to me was the strongest person I ever knew. She gave birth to me and then brought me home with my dad and if that wasn't enough of a life change in having a newborn to deal with less than a week later she lost her husband who was killed on the job while working as a Police Officer. Mom never showed weakness to me. I really think that is where I got my strength from in all the adversity I had to face in my life. Even is her last bit of life she was strong. She never showed that she was tired or was ready to give up. She just let life take its course. That is really the way I want to go.
 
I'm kind of ambivalent about my parents. As I think back, I can think of both good and bad qualities they had...they were just being human I guess.

I wonder what my daughter will remember most about me.
 
My mother? Her generosity. She would give you the shoes off her feet if you needed them. She always said that there are no pockets in shrouds, and as long as she lived she helped others with her purse and her hands. She was good humoured and taught us to be kind to animals. She lived to be 91 and everyone loved her.

My dad? He was more of a mystery. He was in uniform when I was born and I didn't begin to know him until he was demobbed when I was three. He was a quiet man, read a lot and let Mum have her head on most things. He only dug his heels in on matters of principle and then he could not be swayed. He died suddenly when I was just 25 and I regretted that we had not had any deep conversations as adults. He loved children and could be trusted to care for quite young babies. I so wish that he had lived longer to see his grandchildren grow up.
Forgive me for asking... it confuses me that you said your father was demobbed....?
What is the meaning? Was he with the Mafia, sorry to ask living in America brings up 'AL Capone
 
Mom... the hardest worker I know. She taught me the proper way to live in a world that was so difficult for me to fit into as a child and as a teenager. Even though I fought her tooth and nail she stuck by me all the way and was persistent with the way she thought I was suppose to live as a child and teen.

I really think all of this mom did for me when I was young set me up for success in my later life and for me search further later in life what she was always preaching to me and finally accepting it.
 
My parents came of age during the Great Depression and were always frugal in their expenditures of money, not that the family’s income was ever that great.

I thought about my parents a lot after my wife died (8 years ago), and talked to my therapist (back then) about them, part of a retrospective on my own life I guess. I am the youngest of three children, the only boy, and have two older sisters. So I guess perhaps I was spoiled a bit (or more) by my mother. She was the major influence in my life up until I graduated from college, and I certainly loved and respected her. But you know, when I talked to the therapist, it was my father whom I came to understand and appreciate more so then at any other point in my life. I always thought that I was greatly different from him, but maybe not so much.
 
My parents always supported me in my decisions. I remember back in the day when I told them I wanted to go to college and back in my time that was one thing for a female to be taking that step, but also to be going all the way across the country to do so was another thing. My parents supported me all the way.

My parents were also very supportive with my choice of a man who they never met since I met him in college. They approved of him.
 
How they loved and romanced each other throughout their lives. They danced, hugged, kissed passionately, throughout their 49 years together. Dad died at 65 years of age and mom lived to be 85. She lived a good life after he passed, but said many times that after Dad, she could not ever consider being with another.

They taught me how to love....at we will celebrate our 52 anniversary this year...
 
How they loved and romanced each other throughout their lives. They danced, hugged, kissed passionately, throughout their 49 years together. Dad died at 65 years of age and mom lived to be 85. She lived a good life after he passed, but said many times that after Dad, she could not ever consider being with another.

They taught me how to love....at we will celebrate our 52 anniversary this year...
What a truly beautiful story.
52 years is a very long time, your parents surely showed you the best way to live as a couple.
 


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