Ladies married to 10 years younger, Men married to 10 years older??

In the 90s, as it turned out, I was in three relationships...each for a few years, with women who were about 10 years older than me.

So, I was in my mid 30s and they were in their 40s

I think there is nothing wrong with that dynamic.

I don't think it would work for a 20 year old man with a 30 year old woman. But if the man is in his 30s or older, I don't see any problem with it.
 
Denise1952 said:
I met a guy awhile back, 10 years younger, just wondering if anyone has a solid relationship with this age difference, but only want to know about older women, with younger men.

I already know men with younger women seems to work out ok. It's hard to be from "the old school" though and take a guy up on a date that is 10 years my junior.

What do you all say? Would love to hear actual "voices of experience" and if you want, you can send me private message on it, I won't tell. Really, I forget most of what I hear;)

Denise
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This thread is from 2014. I want to know what happened with Denise1952 and her younger guy. :unsure: :)
 
Colleen said:
I can give you my personal experience. I was married to a man that was almost 10 years younger then me. We worked together and I was attracted to him because he had never been married and was a "Christian" and very active in his church. We were married in 1983. He was 28 and I was 37 and I had a son that was 9 years old.

I was very happy and I thought he was, too, but in 1992, I found out differently. He packed up and left (and took the car) one day while I was at work and only left a letter telling me that he had wanted out before the 3rd year of our marriage, but didn't have the courage to say so. He also confessed that he was seeing someone from our church. Nothing like being a hypocrite.

I won't go into the sordid details, but just suffice it to say.....don't get serious if you get in a relationship that may only end in sorrow for you. My ex wanted younger women (which never turned out for him...the idiot!) because he didn't want to be reminded that he was also getting older. He's now 66 and alone.
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Looks like you married a pretend Christian who turned out to be a big jerk! Sad story! This is something I have learned over the years:

There are many bad people that go to church & there are many really decent, kind people who never go to church. Appearance sure can be deceiving!
 
Denise1952 said:
I met a guy awhile back, 10 years younger, just wondering if anyone has a solid relationship with this age difference, but only want to know about older women, with younger men
What do you all say? Would love to hear actual "voices of experience" and if you want, you can send me private message on it, I won't tell. Really, I forget most of what I hear;)

Denise
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It's patently obvious that in Brit speak you have: The Phwoar Factor.
 
I think it matters when you get married, rather than the difference in ages. By that I mean if you are in your 20s even a ten- or 20-year difference doesn't really matter. As you get older , it becomes more and more of a problem.. I think it becomes more a difference in the stages of life than the actual number of years. It's still compatibility rather than age, which is important.
 
Denise1952 said:
I met a guy awhile back, 10 years younger, just wondering if anyone has a solid relationship with this age difference, but only want to know about older women, with younger men.
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Years ago, when I was 30ish I had a relationship with a 40ish woman. I liked her, still do. Did not end up with her, but age had nothing to do with it. 10 years was a bigger gap back then than it would be today. So I'd say you are fine, if you like him go for it!

@Colleen sorry to hear your story, but do you think it really was the age difference that was the problem. Or just him?
 
My mother was married to a man 10 years her senior. Married at 35 and 25 y/o, respectively. Although they stayed together until he passed away, I wouldn't say their marriage was ideal since she was essentially his "trophy wife" and had severe emotional issues as she got older. He was an astute businessman and she was a housewife, so although she worked just as hard as he did and had an innate ability to engage people I think she always felt inferior. :(

On the other hand, my partner is 8 years younger than I am and is my intellectual equal. He was 24 and I was 32 y/o when we met. We clicked immediately. We often think or say the same thing at the same time. That's why we have been together for over 30 years. We are close enough in age to remember the same things, but we are from different generations. When we went to see the Journey and Toto concert I was there to see Toto and he was there to see Journey.

The ability to sustain a relationship with a significant age difference is dependent on so many factors. I think having similar values, respect for each other and a similar sense of humor makes a big difference.
 
mrstime said:
My uncle married a woman who was about 15 years younger than he, the big problem? She is now a widow and has been for the past 12 years.
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I hear you. My grandfather, who passed away at 98 y/o, married a woman 20 years younger after my grandmother passed away. He was in his 60's and she was in her 40's. He was demanding, and she waited on him hand and foot. She not only ended up a widow, but she ended up exhausted after taking care of him for years when his health declined.
 
dseag2 said:
I hear you. My grandfather, who passed away at 98 y/o, married a woman 20 years younger after my grandmother passed away. He was in his 60's and she was in her 40's. He was demanding, and she waited on him hand and foot. She not only ended up a widow, but she ended up exhausted after taking care of him for years when his health declined.
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Well my uncle's wife didn't have to wear herself out tending him. He was normal one day the next he had a massive stroke. His body lived about another week........but he wasn't in there.
 
Colleen said:
I can give you my personal experience. I was married to a man that was almost 10 years younger then me. We worked together and I was attracted to him because he had never been married and was a "Christian" and very active in his church. We were married in 1983. He was 28 and I was 37 and I had a son that was 9 years old.

I was very happy and I thought he was, too, but in 1992, I found out differently. He packed up and left (and took the car) one day while I was at work and only left a letter telling me that he had wanted out before the 3rd year of our marriage, but didn't have the courage to say so. He also confessed that he was seeing someone from our church. Nothing like being a hypocrite.

I won't go into the sordid details, but just suffice it to say.....don't get serious if you get in a relationship that may only end in sorrow for you. My ex wanted younger women (which never turned out for him...the idiot!) because he didn't want to be reminded that he was also getting older. He's now 66 and alone.
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^^^^ Happens often when you evaluate someone based on religion.
 

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