Describe an awkward event

Mr. Ed

Mr. Ed

Be what you is not what you what you ain’t
Location
Central NY
Sunday morning church services. Youth choir seating at right side of pulpit platform. After choir special comes the prayer before the sermon. The only sound you hear is the prayer except on that particular day a generous amount of gas escaped into the breathing space of innocent choir members. As if that wasn’t awkward enough, not only did I tainted the air, in doing so the reverberation from my butt cheeks deafened the sound of prayer.
 

When I moved to my house in the forest I had to adapt to living with conifer bugs (aka stink bugs). They were everywhere. If they see you looking at them they let off their odor. So I dressed nicely to go with my husband to approve the final recording of his album at the recording studio. The recording engineer had me put the headphones on to listen and all of a sudden I feel something climbing up my leg inside my pants! Then I could smell it.........oh no! Sure enough, one of those confiers had hibernated in my pants. I reached down and held onto him so he could not go up any further and tried to act normal and listen to the music. As soon as the music ended, I made my way to the bathroom to get rid of that little stinker.......flush!
 
I was at this very upscale event at my boss's home. His brother was a well-known TV commentator- on TV all the time. Those were the type of guests. I had just come out of the Navy. My boss, the host said he was preparing some wine and cheese for us. When he left, somehow I got to telling about this rot gut cheap wine we used to drink in the Navy. It was $2.46 for a gallon. But I just couldn't remember the name of it. Just as he came around the corner carrying the tray, I said, "Oh, that cheap rot gut wine was "Paisano". And there was a great big fat bottle of Paisano on the tray.
 

squatting dog said:
Brought my new wife to meet my folks. (her idea). Bad move as my mother invited my old girlfriend to visit at the same time. (mom always thought I married the wrong one).
Click to expand...
That reminds me ... My boyfriend and I invited my friend and her husband (Brian) to a small party. My sister found out about the party and invited herself. And she just had to mention that Brian used to be my boyfriend. My new bf was out of sorts the whole night.
 
A friend of mines sister had a little craft store with a deli so we would stop in to eat. One day his sister comes over to our table and shows me a sweatshirt with an American flag embroided on it, all fuzzy and ugly looking. She says I should buy it for my wife and I said I would never waste money on something stupid like that. She looks at me and goes "I made this myself by hand". I felt about an inch tall.
 
When I was about 30 I was passing through Atlanta and decided to visit my 90 year old great aunt. I had just planned to pick her up and go to lunch. Without telling me she put the word out amongst a bunch of 2nd and 3rd cousins I have never met. They planned quite a formal event, I showed in jeans and a tee shirt. It was awkward, but still appreciated getting to see my aunt. Apparently that branch of my family were much "higher society" than I.
 
At Christmas time, my mother-in-law's brother and wife came over to the family dinner gathering unannounced with gifts for everyone.

We separated all of the gifts from under the tree into piles beside each seated guest in the living room. Of course, there were NO gifts for the brother and his wife because no one was expecting them. I swear the cringe factor was times a thousand...I didn't know where to look. Can you say...

AWKward MOment!
 
I had just called in to see my mother, my husband drove past her house on his way home from the local swimming pool and decided to call in for a visit. He settled himself in the lounge chair, but I noticed he had on his rather short shorts and part of anatomy was showing in one leg. I was trying to give him the eye to adjust himself, my mother had realised what she saw as well and couldn't get out of her seat fast enough to go and make the tea.
When she was out of range I said, "you haven't got any undies on", and he said, "how did you know?" I said his left b*ll was showing .. He was so embarrassed and excused himself saying he forgot to get some petrol. The subject never came up again.
 
Dispatched for a Cardiac Arrest, CPR in progress, in a small trailer park known for drugs and other shenanigan's.
We arrive to find several young people standing outside involved in a shouting match. Mostly between a lady and a guy in pants, no shirt or shoes. We are directed inside to a bedroom to find a very drunk, very young, very naked, very alive girl. In trying to get details of what happened, the shouting gets worse and the lady attacks the guy. We call for Law enforcement.....
The story goes....The guy says he was taking a shower, heard a crash, and came out to find the girl had collapsed, naked, in his bedroom, not breathing, and started CPR.... Nice Guy.... The Lady, also the Guys wife comes home from work early, to find her naked Husband, "SAVING" her 16 year old naked drunk SISTER!!!!!
 
Sorry for the graphic story, but I look back and laugh to this day. I had IBS when I was younger. I attended a conference in Toronto and ate lunch right before I headed to the airport. I checked in at the airport, then that "need" to use the bathroom came over me. The only bathrooms were on the other side of security. As I was headed through security, I really needed to go and was even sweating. I threw my stuff on the belt and ran through. The security agents were saying "sir, please stop". I told them I really needed to use the bathroom. I did make it to the other side.

I felt a great sense of relief. But as I was going down the moving sidewalk to the gate I saw a couple of guys commenting and laughing at me. When I got to the gate I realized my suit jacket was tucked into the back of my pants. :ROFLMAO:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top