Cheapskate Stories

[applecruncher]

Ever watch the TLC show “Extreme Cheapskates”? Well, these people weren’t quite that bad, but…………

A former long-time friend (one of my college roommates) and her husband were – imo – beyond frugal. They were cheapskates when it came to certain things. (I also think wife allowed husband to control the finances, but that’s another story.)

Wife had to go to library to use internet.
Husband only showered every other day (I visited a few times and he should have showered more often, if ya get my drift)
They had a black rotary dial phone from 1978 until 2005 when they moved.
Wife’s brother came to town, they treated him to dinner out, then they got mad because he said he’d treat them to dessert and took them to an ice-cream parlor. They said ice cream isn't dessert. They complained about this for years.

These people were not poor. Wife supported herself fine when she lived in NYC/Manhattan in the 1970s (I visited her. She had an apartment on the Upper West Side before rents got crazy.) Husband made a six-figure salary, wife taught school (in NYC and VA) for about 20 yrs, then she managed a computer store. When the store closed husband told her to get another job – which she did, at Burger King. For several years. They never had kids, and lived in an apartment in Virginia until retirement. Wife received a very large inheritance when her mother died (which husband promptly took charge of).

They paid cash for a new car every 4/5 years.
When they retired (age 57) they bought their first house in Arizona in 2005 and put ½ down.

But I scratched my head at some of the things they did. :shrug:

 

[oakapple]

Yes, you wouldn't mind if these kind of people were poor, you would expect frugality, but it's usually those who have quite enough cash but just don't want to spend it.

 

[hollydolly]

I always say those who are the most cheapskates are well off simply by dint of being so frugal...but what a waste of what could be a decent enjoyable life living like that..

 

[Falcon]

We had a classmate who drove himself to school. IF you wanted to ride with him, you HAD to chip in for gas.

HE was going there anyway. Most of us would rather take the bus ( for 10 cents) than give that cheapskate the money.

 

[applecruncher]

Thought of another one.

About 25 yrs ago I worked at a small non-profit. Things were pretty casual, and during nice weather we usually went out for a group lunch on Fridays.

One woman would ALWAYS get up and go to the restroom when it came time for everyone to chip in on the check. Supervisor would let it go and he usually paid more anyway. But this woman thought she was slick. It made me mad to help pay for her lunch.


When supervisor's wife had a baby, everyone chippoed in on a gift. That same woman always had an excuse "left wallet at home, only enough money for gas home, will bring it tomorrow". She never did.

 

[Cookie]

I knew a guy who was so cheap he would wash and re-use his dental floss! (he was in no way poor)

 

[Glinda]

To me there's a difference between cheap and frugal. Cheap often implies not paying your fair share. Frugal is more a matter of making things last, not being wasteful, and wise money management.

 

[applecruncher]

To me there's a difference between cheap and frugal. Cheap often implies not paying your fair share. Frugal is more a matter of making things last, not being wasteful, and wise money management.

Okay, but both cheap and frugal can often cross the line into disgusting. (not bathing, re-using dental floss and toilet paper, reusing dirty dishes to save soap, etc.)

I knew a guy who was so cheap he would wash and re-use his dental floss! (he was in no way poor)

OMG say it ain't so! :eek1:

 

[Josiah]

I confess I fall squarely into this category of pathological cheapskate. I fully appreciate how illogical such behavior is and I've made some progress in overcoming it, but old habits die hard. A typical manifestation of my behavior is when it's time to reorder supplements. What I should do is stop in at my friendly health food store and ask the clerk who is a delightful person to choose a brand for me. But no, helping out a struggling little local business is not for me, I'm on Amazon comparing prices looking for free shipping deals, spending 20 minutes dithering to save $1.89. OK I need to go to cheapskates anonymous. Help.

 

[applecruncher]

I confess I fall squarely into this category of pathological cheapskate. I fully appreciate how illogical such behavior is and I've made some progress in overcoming it, but old habits die hard. A typical manifestation of my behavior is when it's time to reorder supplements. What I should do is stop in at my friendly health food store and ask the clerk who is a delightful person to choose a brand for me. But no, helping out a struggling little local business is not for me, I'm on Amazon comparing prices looking for free shipping deals, spending 20 minutes dithering to save $1.89. OK I need to go to cheapskates anonymous. Help.

(If you're serious) Hate to burst your bubble, but that is NOT cheapskate behavior.

If you saw someone toss the remainder of a container of expired vitamin supplements into the trash, then grabbed and used them, that might be different.

 

[pchrise]

Its called recycling and reducing your carbon foot print. Ok a bit over done on some level. The bath thing a bit much.

 

[Josiah]

(If you're serious) Hate to burst your bubble, but that is NOT cheapskate behavior.

If you saw someone toss the remainder of a container of expired vitamin supplements into the trash, then grabbed and used them, that might be different.

OK maybe I'm not world class frugal, but I recognize that I have a problem because I know that my frugal habits have seriously limited my enjoyment of life.

 

[ndynt]

I had a aunt that had 12 boys. She would cut paper napkins in half, they could only have a half an apple, there was a chart on the refrigerator and they had to mark it, when they took anything to eat or drink. Sundays she would come to visit, with a shopping bag, asking what we had for her to take home. At Christmas, when they were old enough, the boys worked to buy themselves presents. They would wrap them and put them under the tree (that they cut down in the woods) so they would have something, other than what my father bought them, for Christmas. But, she would buy Christmas gifts for my sister and I. I never opened mine, unless I was forced to.
Really sad part about this....she ended up buying four very large houses, that she divided into rentals. In a nice community. And even got a Italian speaking lawyer to con her father into selling her his house, way below market. Dividing it into apartments and renting him a room, for what her mortgage amount was. She was the ultimate cheapskate....

 

[applecruncher]

Sad about the boys, ndynt.

 

[Butterfly]

(If you're serious) Hate to burst your bubble, but that is NOT cheapskate behavior.

If you saw someone toss the remainder of a container of expired vitamin supplements into the trash, then grabbed and used them, that might be different.

I agree -- that's not cheapskate, it's frugal. Cheapskate is not paying your fair share, like the person mentioned above who always left when it was time to chip in for the check. That's cheapskate. I think most of us shop around for the best price, shipping, etc. -- that's just common sense nowdays.

 

[SifuPhil]

Josiah, I agree with the others that you're not cheap, you're frugal, and you're in good company - look how many people shop at Walmart rather than support their (now extinct) local merchants.

Here's an example of frugal: a bar that I bounced at had an owner who would buy only the cheapest brands of liquor. His patrons didn't seem to mind after the first drink or so, so he kept doing it for years.

An example of cheapskate: another bar owner that I worked security for not only bought the cheapest brands of liquor, but would proceed to water them down according to a little "recipe" notebook he kept, then pour them into empty, expensive brand-name liquor bottles. It was against the law, but he did it anyway, because he saved a few bucks (while running the risk of incurring fines of tens of thousands of dollars).

Me? I'll wear a pair of pants so long that I could be arrested at any time for indecent exposure. I tell myself that they're just getting comfortable, but in reality I hate to go shopping for a new pair, and REALLY hate paying the high prices for them. I usually end up at Salvation Army ...

 

[applecruncher]

I read about a couple who received *as a wedding present* a box full of fast-food-packaged condiments. Salts, peppers, ketchups, relishes, soy sauce - you name it, it was in the box.

They were - surprised, but when they met with the gifters, the gifters were clearly pleased as a punch with themselves. "We can't tell you how often we've wished we had a box like that - for just when you need a little mayonnaise or creamer and you don't have one handy. We're so glad we were able to set you up right from the beginning!".

 

[Debby]

OK maybe I'm not world class frugal, but I recognize that I have a problem because I know that my frugal habits have seriously limited my enjoyment of life.

On the other hand, maybe you should just change your perspective and admit to yourself that on some level, that gives you some level of pleasure and for you it's a good thing. And if other folks get their enjoyment out of spending more freely, so what? Like some women (and men) enjoy shopping for clothes but I absolutely hate it because on that score, I'm a 'cheapskate'. (Got enough clothes - why buy more?) Doesn't make either of us right or better! So enjoy the penny counting.

 

[Cookie]

Here's another definition of cheapskate

Parsimonious: - penny pincher, tight, close, niggardly, miserly, illiberal, mean, penurious; avaricious, covetous. See stingy[SUP]1[/SUP].

Another way I've seen it used is by the word 'mean', indicating a mean existence, frugal to the point of deprivation with very little creature comforts. I don't know anyone like that and I'm sure no one here fits that description.

I understand the term 'penny pincher' comes from the olden days when people carried their money and coins in drawstring bags and when paying, would reach inside to feel each coin, drawing out one coin at a time, after feeling it carefully, never drawing money onto their palm to count it, thereby never risking anyone seeing how much they had.

 

[Josiah]

On the other hand, maybe you should just change your perspective and admit to yourself that on some level, that gives you some level of pleasure and for you it's a good thing. And if other folks get their enjoyment out of spending more freely, so what? Like some women (and men) enjoy shopping for clothes but I absolutely hate it because on that score, I'm a 'cheapskate'. (Got enough clothes - why buy more?) Doesn't make either of us right or better! So enjoy the penny counting.

Thanks Debby, I rationalize my behavior along the same lines, plus I have some other excuses to fall back on.

 

[ndynt]

Sad about the boys, ndynt.

Actually, they all became pretty well adjusted adults. One a lawyer, another a monk, another a Jesuit priest, another an artist, and the remaining boys all had successful businesses.

 

[Susie]

Still can't come to grips with "cheap versus frugal"!
Now, if you save all wrapping paper, iron it, then reuse it, is that cheap or frugal?
If you put aside all unwanted gifts, in order to regift them later, would you consider yourself cheap or frugal?
The big question: If you're a multimillionaire, would you prefer living in a large, ostentatious mansion, or hide away with your millions in a small, dark hole of an apartment?
If you were to travel on a luxury liner, would you wear cheap clothes (second hand, Target, Penny's) to hide the fact that you're very rich, also to avoid "heavy tipping"?

 

[ndynt]

Still can't come to grips with "cheap versus frugal"!

The way I view it....though both pinch pennies, to try and save money....frugal people may deprive themselves, but, do not do it at the expense of others.

 

[applecruncher]

Resurrecting this old thread.

I heard about a guy who has plenty of money, but goes to various food pantries and keeps a kitchen well-stocked with food - most of which he didn't pay for. Good thing he doesn't qualify for food stamps - he'd be in heaven. I'm told he has an expensive coffee maker and only buys Starbucks.

 

[James]

A former supervisor of mine would go up to the local donut shop after 9pm and pick out the bags of day old donuts and bagels from the garbage. Embarrassingly cheap.