Why are you single?

RUTH,
are you referring to me? I am not familiar with Myers-Brigg and what is borderline I/E?
 

Amethyst1 said:
RUTH,
are you referring to me? I am not familiar with Myers-Brigg and what is borderline I/E?
Click to expand...

Myers_Briggs-480x280.jpg
 
I've heard of that "test" or whatever it is. I've never taken it, I don't think it works on people from other planets:newhere:star-trek-aliens1.jpg
 

Ruth said:
You must be my twin! I am a 63 year old retired lady, introvert, Myers-Briggs INTP (borderline I/E). I cook all of my meals from scratch, too (low carb) and love ethnic foods. I understand that my personality type is only 1% of the population so it is great to encounter someone who might be the same personality type! I don't smoke or drink, either. I'm in your state, too (how cool!)
Click to expand...

I'm an ENFJ Extremely strong on all of the preferences. Lately, I find myself becoming more of an Introvert. I used to teach M-B seminars at the college as part of our weekend Human Potential class.
 
That was kind of interesting to do Kim, thanks:) Hard on some because both answers I felt the same about, but just picked one:) Ty, Denise;)
 
Probably no one visits this thread, but here goes nothing.

Exactly 9 months ago today, I've lost my husband unexpectedly and suddenly. So, my status went from happily married for 36+ years to widow and therefore single.

I felt comfortable saying it only after hubby had his funeral service. However, it still feels strange as I'm pondering on what I'm supposed to do next...

Example: someone goes through a divorce, upon it being final (from people who are friends) they both took their wedding rings off. Then started on the dating scene again.

Granted, I miss the daily kisses and hugs. Waking up together in the morning and going to bed at night. Sincerely, it feels as if we're back (daughter and I -- son died in 2017) into the routine we had when hubby was away on work contracts for months on end but without daily phone calls or weekend returns.

I had to get things organised with munchkins teaching, daily chores, going out shopping. However, these days everything is limited as the cash isn't available as it was back then. So, it's keeping things going while finding new groceries avenue which costs less and surprisingly gives us more food.

I've found this site after crying my eyes out on a bereavement site which in the end gave no support. I've acquired a new kitten for help, health and vitality. No offers of medication to cope with situation at hand. However, kitten has been the best medicine and daughter too, she's been a rock.

Looking for friends as I love a word or two here and there, I get that here, which is an added bonus. The first few days afterwards were the hardest. Month of May had daughter's and hubby's birthday and his funeral took place in the last week of May.

Our 37th wedding anniversary was in June and we used to look at our wedding album usually. I couldn't find the strength to even pick it up.

Daughter and I took out our July to-do list and we've been working on it, slowly but surely. Scoring off what we wanted done. Granted had to add a few more things which thankfully were done quickly. We're getting there.

Saturdays are difficult as he died on a Saturday and on the anniversary as like today, it's a wee bit more trying. Maybe once it's been a year that he's gone, I might start looking but I feel more that if a second soulmate is out there for me, it'll happen the same way I'd met my departed husband back in the 80s.

For now, getting friends to chat with is the priority as loneliness is a constant companion these days. Cheers!
 
Supernatural said:
Probably no one visits this thread, but here goes nothing.

Exactly 9 months ago today, I've lost my husband unexpectedly and suddenly. So, my status went from happily married for 36+ years to widow and therefore single.

I felt comfortable saying it only after hubby had his funeral service. However, it still feels strange as I'm pondering on what I'm supposed to do next...

Example: someone goes through a divorce, upon it being final (from people who are friends) they both took their wedding rings off. Then started on the dating scene again.

Granted, I miss the daily kisses and hugs. Waking up together in the morning and going to bed at night. Sincerely, it feels as if we're back (daughter and I -- son died in 2017) into the routine we had when hubby was away on work contracts for months on end but without daily phone calls or weekend returns.

I had to get things organised with munchkins teaching, daily chores, going out shopping. However, these days everything is limited as the cash isn't available as it was back then. So, it's keeping things going while finding new groceries avenue which costs less and surprisingly gives us more food.

I've found this site after crying my eyes out on a bereavement site which in the end gave no support. I've acquired a new kitten for help, health and vitality. No offers of medication to cope with situation at hand. However, kitten has been the best medicine and daughter too, she's been a rock.

Looking for friends as I love a word or two here and there, I get that here, which is an added bonus. The first few days afterwards were the hardest. Month of May had daughter's and hubby's birthday and his funeral took place in the last week of May.

Our 37th wedding anniversary was in June and we used to look at our wedding album usually. I couldn't find the strength to even pick it up.

Daughter and I took out our July to-do list and we've been working on it, slowly but surely. Scoring off what we wanted done. Granted had to add a few more things which thankfully were done quickly. We're getting there.

Saturdays are difficult as he died on a Saturday and on the anniversary as like today, it's a wee bit more trying. Maybe once it's been a year that he's gone, I might start looking but I feel more that if a second soulmate is out there for me, it'll happen the same way I'd met my departed husband back in the 80s.

For now, getting friends to chat with is the priority as loneliness is a constant companion these days. Cheers!
Click to expand...
Fabulous, just fabulous post. We all have this love/hate relationship with others. They are there as a help, yet they can be so exasperating, but others, that's friends, relatives and partners are so inspiring, so frustrating, so annoying, yet so inexplicably needy, without them life is lonely but sometimes with them, well, life can be, how can I put it, diplomatically? Crowded! Stay here Supernateral, we will look after you, take care of you, be the shoulder to cry on. I promise!
 
Why am I single? I've been pondering this question for a long time. My thoughts:

1. Most men want someone very normal, within a certain range and depending on social class and other factors. I'm just not typical enough, and this bothers them.

2. I always rushed into relationships, hoping for the best. I never understood what it meant to get to know the person first.

3. Somehow I usually chose men who accused me of doing things I wouldn't dream of doing (e.g., cheating, or "using" them). Or they pulled stunts that I couldn't tolerate in the long run, e.g., insulting me, or tricking me into paying for everything.

4. For 15 years, I've lived in very small places. This narrows the field somewhat. Plus it just isn't wise, because everyone is connected in some way (ex's best friend, neighbor's worst enemy, various disputes). And if you break up, it's going to be awkward in various ways.

5. Now that I'm older, I'm more limited, mostly physically. Also, I'm less willing to take a chance. A failed relationship can be devastating, and picking up the pieces and starting over is harder now. (And any man I met would probably say the same thing.)

I'm perfectly capable of living alone and all that. But no, I don't love being single.
 
Supernatural said:
Probably no one visits this thread, but here goes nothing.

Exactly 9 months ago today, I've lost my husband unexpectedly and suddenly. So, my status went from happily married for 36+ years to widow and therefore single.

I felt comfortable saying it only after hubby had his funeral service. However, it still feels strange as I'm pondering on what I'm supposed to do next...

Example: someone goes through a divorce, upon it being final (from people who are friends) they both took their wedding rings off. Then started on the dating scene again.

Granted, I miss the daily kisses and hugs. Waking up together in the morning and going to bed at night. Sincerely, it feels as if we're back (daughter and I -- son died in 2017) into the routine we had when hubby was away on work contracts for months on end but without daily phone calls or weekend returns.

I had to get things organised with munchkins teaching, daily chores, going out shopping. However, these days everything is limited as the cash isn't available as it was back then. So, it's keeping things going while finding new groceries avenue which costs less and surprisingly gives us more food.

I've found this site after crying my eyes out on a bereavement site which in the end gave no support. I've acquired a new kitten for help, health and vitality. No offers of medication to cope with situation at hand. However, kitten has been the best medicine and daughter too, she's been a rock.

Looking for friends as I love a word or two here and there, I get that here, which is an added bonus. The first few days afterwards were the hardest. Month of May had daughter's and hubby's birthday and his funeral took place in the last week of May.

Our 37th wedding anniversary was in June and we used to look at our wedding album usually. I couldn't find the strength to even pick it up.

Daughter and I took out our July to-do list and we've been working on it, slowly but surely. Scoring off what we wanted done. Granted had to add a few more things which thankfully were done quickly. We're getting there.

Saturdays are difficult as he died on a Saturday and on the anniversary as like today, it's a wee bit more trying. Maybe once it's been a year that he's gone, I might start looking but I feel more that if a second soulmate is out there for me, it'll happen the same way I'd met my departed husband back in the 80s.

For now, getting friends to chat with is the priority as loneliness is a constant companion these days. Cheers!
Click to expand...
Just dreadful to lose your love and life like that with no warning. Your life changes without notice.. and you have to learn amongst the grief and shock how to live a new life... what a shame we live 2 countries apart... we could be buddies... 🤗
 
Supernatural said:
Probably no one visits this thread, but here goes nothing.

Exactly 9 months ago today, I've lost my husband unexpectedly and suddenly. So, my status went from happily married for 36+ years to widow and therefore single.

I felt comfortable saying it only after hubby had his funeral service. However, it still feels strange as I'm pondering on what I'm supposed to do next...

Example: someone goes through a divorce, upon it being final (from people who are friends) they both took their wedding rings off. Then started on the dating scene again.

Granted, I miss the daily kisses and hugs. Waking up together in the morning and going to bed at night. Sincerely, it feels as if we're back (daughter and I -- son died in 2017) into the routine we had when hubby was away on work contracts for months on end but without daily phone calls or weekend returns.

I had to get things organised with munchkins teaching, daily chores, going out shopping. However, these days everything is limited as the cash isn't available as it was back then. So, it's keeping things going while finding new groceries avenue which costs less and surprisingly gives us more food.

I've found this site after crying my eyes out on a bereavement site which in the end gave no support. I've acquired a new kitten for help, health and vitality. No offers of medication to cope with situation at hand. However, kitten has been the best medicine and daughter too, she's been a rock.

Looking for friends as I love a word or two here and there, I get that here, which is an added bonus. The first few days afterwards were the hardest. Month of May had daughter's and hubby's birthday and his funeral took place in the last week of May.

Our 37th wedding anniversary was in June and we used to look at our wedding album usually. I couldn't find the strength to even pick it up.

Daughter and I took out our July to-do list and we've been working on it, slowly but surely. Scoring off what we wanted done. Granted had to add a few more things which thankfully were done quickly. We're getting there.

Saturdays are difficult as he died on a Saturday and on the anniversary as like today, it's a wee bit more trying. Maybe once it's been a year that he's gone, I might start looking but I feel more that if a second soulmate is out there for me, it'll happen the same way I'd met my departed husband back in the 80s.

For now, getting friends to chat with is the priority as loneliness is a constant companion these days. Cheers!
Click to expand...

A heartfelt post...I wish you all the very best, and if I may offer a suggestion?
While seeking friends, those that uplift you are the best ones 🌷
 
Supernatural said:
Probably no one visits this thread, but here goes nothing.

Exactly 9 months ago today, I've lost my husband unexpectedly and suddenly. So, my status went from happily married for 36+ years to widow and therefore single.

I felt comfortable saying it only after hubby had his funeral service. However, it still feels strange as I'm pondering on what I'm supposed to do next...

Example: someone goes through a divorce, upon it being final (from people who are friends) they both took their wedding rings off. Then started on the dating scene again.

Granted, I miss the daily kisses and hugs. Waking up together in the morning and going to bed at night. Sincerely, it feels as if we're back (daughter and I -- son died in 2017) into the routine we had when hubby was away on work contracts for months on end but without daily phone calls or weekend returns.

I had to get things organised with munchkins teaching, daily chores, going out shopping. However, these days everything is limited as the cash isn't available as it was back then. So, it's keeping things going while finding new groceries avenue which costs less and surprisingly gives us more food.

I've found this site after crying my eyes out on a bereavement site which in the end gave no support. I've acquired a new kitten for help, health and vitality. No offers of medication to cope with situation at hand. However, kitten has been the best medicine and daughter too, she's been a rock.

Looking for friends as I love a word or two here and there, I get that here, which is an added bonus. The first few days afterwards were the hardest. Month of May had daughter's and hubby's birthday and his funeral took place in the last week of May.

Our 37th wedding anniversary was in June and we used to look at our wedding album usually. I couldn't find the strength to even pick it up.

Daughter and I took out our July to-do list and we've been working on it, slowly but surely. Scoring off what we wanted done. Granted had to add a few more things which thankfully were done quickly. We're getting there.

Saturdays are difficult as he died on a Saturday and on the anniversary as like today, it's a wee bit more trying. Maybe once it's been a year that he's gone, I might start looking but I feel more that if a second soulmate is out there for me, it'll happen the same way I'd met my departed husband back in the 80s.

For now, getting friends to chat with is the priority as loneliness is a constant companion these days. Cheers!
Click to expand...
So sorry for the loss of the LOVE of your LIFE, and your SON.
I can’t say I know what your going through….because I don’t….my 2 departures were divorces.
I have never lost a close other through death like you have.
I think you are very strong…..happy to hear your daughter is the great support you need, and with your precious fur baby.
Try and keep strong.
 
Why am I single? Well, here's the thing, I'm not much of a catch. I've no idea why someone would choose me out of the thousands of people in the area. I've lived a life that has been both good and bad, and as I get older I regret more and more. I love my dog, although he's as dumb as a post. I don't have any money, no property, and my belongings easily fit in a room. I like women who are women. I sometimes need looking after. You know, a meal every now and then (I actually don't mind cooking for myself usually), making a nice cup of tea.

Why am I single? I'm like most, I think. Life has batted me around a lot, and I have lumps and bruises. I can be selfish without even knowing it. I have no business having expectations for a partner, but I do anyway. I like quiet. I like a couple to be a couple. I'm not a social gadfly.

I'm BORING. My two loves are my dog and music. LIstening to music is a great. I'm not much for Social Media, etc. I basically want to live my remaining days in happiness. None of this is attractive to the kind of women I find attractive. Why? Unreasonable expectations on my part. Weird, huh?
 
MickaC said:
So sorry for the loss of the LOVE of your LIFE, and your SON.
I can’t say I know what your going through….because I don’t….my 2 departures were divorces.
I have never lost a close other through death like you have.
I think you are very strong…..happy to hear your daughter is the great support you need, and with your precious fur baby.
Try and keep strong.
Click to expand...
Thanks @MickaC very much appreciated. If I remember the Provinces setup for Canada, your next door to British Columbia where one of my uncles has lived since he turned 18 years old and became, eventually, as an English University teacher.

He resides for a long time in a place called Lac Louise. I'm having my first birthday as a widow in two months or so as February's short and counting things is a mess lol! You've joined here three days after our official lockdown here in Scotland.

I remember it well as I thought I'd be choking due to my thyroid gland swelled up. My GPs appointment was cancelled due to the Pandemic. I'm glad to say that without medical help, I've found the herbal medicine required.

As my soul is still hurting at least my body feels better. Sorry for the rambling! Cheers.
 
Paladin1950 said:
Why are you not single?
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Well @Paladin1950 you'll get a good laugh out of my views and/or opinions. Here goes... (Please note that this is what we were told in school back in the 60s). A single person is someone under 25 which never experienced anything yet in the opposite sex. Once 25, they were called "Old Maid" still single kind of lol. Once married, the sayings were: "Off the market, she's Mrs now..." Then while married you loose your spouse to death, you became a widow (female) or widower (male) which meant (according to them teachers, mind you) without a spouse but with mileage and experience lol!

So, yes, I learned some weird things while in education. So, laugh away, no offence will be taken as I don't know how to carry on with the side of love around a second time. I'm needing time to heal, forgive and let go... I hope you understand, thanks!
 
Well, I'm single as the candidate for mentorship decided the call of the void was more valid then rearing a family.

The other half was southern raised, no emotion shown (Except anger, cutting remarks and critiquing/critizing damn near everything) the other siblings were more apt to be either using me (older sibling) or condescending (younger sibling)

In fact, recalling a recent visual joke about who was representing wheaties, was sent to older sibling. So far, no response, though we have had several months of monthly breakfast.

Piss on it, if she wants to meet, she can step forward, I'm done pulling teeth.
 
horseless carriage said:
Fabulous, just fabulous post. We all have this love/hate relationship with others. They are there as a help, yet they can be so exasperating, but others, that's friends, relatives and partners are so inspiring, so frustrating, so annoying, yet so inexplicably needy, without them life is lonely but sometimes with them, well, life can be, how can I put it, diplomatically? Crowded! Stay here Supernateral, we will look after you, take care of you, be the shoulder to cry on. I promise!
Click to expand...
Thank you @horseless carriage that's so heartfelt thanks 😭😭😭
 
hollydolly said:
Just dreadful to lose your love and life like that with no warning. Your life changes without notice.. and you have to learn amongst the grief and shock how to live a new life... what a shame we live 2 countries apart... we could be buddies... 🤗
Click to expand...
We can be buddies @hollydolly I'm in Scotland not that far, but meanwhile, I've added my Skype link on my profile. The video call service is free. I know I've reached out to a longtime indie author friend a few weeks ago and over the weekend to my bestest cousin.

At least we can be online buddies. Cheers!
 
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VaughanJB said:
Why am I single? Well, here's the thing, I'm not much of a catch. I've no idea why someone would choose me out of the thousands of people in the area. I've lived a life that has been both good and bad, and as I get older I regret more and more. I love my dog, although he's as dumb as a post. I don't have any money, no property, and my belongings easily fit in a room. I like women who are women. I sometimes need looking after. You know, a meal every now and then (I actually don't mind cooking for myself usually), making a nice cup of tea.

Why am I single? I'm like most, I think. Life has batted me around a lot, and I have lumps and bruises. I can be selfish without even knowing it. I have no business having expectations for a partner, but I do anyway. I like quiet. I like a couple to be a couple. I'm not a social gadfly.

I'm BORING. My two loves are my dog and music. LIstening to music is a great. I'm not much for Social Media, etc. I basically want to live my remaining days in happiness. None of this is attractive to the kind of women I find attractive. Why? Unreasonable expectations on my part. Weird, huh?
Click to expand...
Sorry, but this so reminds me of this clip

 

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