Do You Ever Worry About Getting Dementia?

I do worry some when spouse asks same thing over and over ........ or forgets things i just told him .....cannot keep things in his head for even a couple hours sometimes but i see most is if it was not HIS idea or something important to him he just does not care to remember

i have known many who end up with a spouse with dementia and it looks like an awful existence..........
 
Jeni said:
i have known many who end up with a spouse with dementia and it looks like an awful existence..........
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It really does, that's why I'm so worried about it. If Huzz gets it before I do, he's 14 inches taller than I and outweighs me by 100 lb. so it'd be something for me to try to control him, i.e. get him to shower, to bed, to not drive, etc., all those kinda things that you have to deal with with an Alz. patient. And I dread getting it myself and putting him through it with me. I worry about it constantly but I don't think there's a darn thing that I can do about it (which makes it even more worrying of course). Ain't life wonderful for the elderly? :cautious:
 
Admitting that I am still in employment at the age of 77 doesn't exactly get me derision, but I am definitely out of step.
Forbes health states that:

"Research shows a connection between the early stages of retirement and cognitive decline, and numerous studies indicate that retirement can exacerbate a slew of mental health challenges, including anxiety and depression. However, creative hobbies and other stimulating activities can accomplish the opposite effect, reducing risk of dementia as they help keep the mind sharp. Maintaining strong personal and social connections makes a difference, too."

What work gives me is interaction with others, it's that kind of stimulus that has kept me relatively of sound mind. Having a job that I enjoy helps too. Added to that, the benefit that the extra income brings in means we can afford going to the many festivals that we enjoy. People can be annoying I readily admit, however, engaging with others, the social activity of connecting, staves off dementia, so if you will forgive me, I must get ready for work.
 
Yes, I am afraid as my Mother had it. She lived with me a couple of years and everything was fine. It came on quite suddenly and I could not keep her safe at home. She was placed into care at that point. The whole thing was horrible. It broke my heart. I had promised her I would take care of her but it came to the point there was no choice. She was about 87 then.

We all have the so called normal things as we age. I forget things, I lose things, I have trouble with things I used to do with ease but now can't seem to stay on top of things. I also think that some of this if the fact that I live alone now.

I don't want to be one of those in care crying out for my loved ones when they were there justt here the day before. I saw this so often, the heartbreak of those older people, calling out, day after day and not realizing they had family visiting constantly. I am sure they did not just want to exist, locked in, not knowing what the heck was happening. NO, I do not want that, I would rather be set free of my earthly body. Does that make sense to anyone else?
 
davey said:
we don't really have to worry about it ; it in fact leaves us worryfree!
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Does that mean you won't know what is happening if you get it? Will you be that elderly man in my Mother's care facility sitting in a wheelchair. He sat in the hall everyday crying out for his beloved "Livie", his wife. She came everyday for breakfast and dinner but he could not remember she had been there. So,true, you may not have to worry and remember it because you will be locked in prison of your own mind, never knowing what has happened. Does not change the fact you will live out your remaining days in terror.
 
Blessed I have worked in those environments as a 'care worker' and my experience has been that the example you have given is certainly a true one but also rare. The majority of elderly persons with dementia whether male or female 'normally' can demonstrate frustration in some ways but not highly emotional behaviors - that has seemed to be predominently low in featuring although not completely missing. And it is indeed a good thing in some ways. I am somewhat surprised that someone with dementia can in fact remember his wife at all?
 

Signs it’s just Forgetfulness​

If the following things apply to you or a loved one, it’s likely that the scatterbrained behavior is the result of normal aging:

  1. You remember what you forgot later. If you forgot where you put your keys or were trying to remember the name of the street your daughter lives on but couldn’t, don’t worry. As long as you remember the information later (be it 5 minutes or two hours later) you’re probably fine. The ability to eventually recall information differentiates age-induced forgetfulness from dementia, which renders people unable to remember misplaced information at all.
  2. You can be reminded of forgotten information. Have you ever lost your train of thought during a conversation only to be reminded of what you were saying by a friend? This is an example of “normal” or age-induced forgetfulness. All people get forgetful at some point, but when simple reminders from friends or family can help you pick up where you left off, it’s likely that you’re simply experiencing normal forgetfulness.
  3. Tools help you remember. If you forget to take your medication unless you set a cell phone reminder or write yourself a note, the forgetfulness is likely nothing to worry about. People who use post-it notes or electronic reminders to trigger certain behaviors are likely experiencing “normal” forgetfulness. On the other hand, people who don’t remember what their reminders are there for may be displaying symptoms of dementia.
  4. Forgetting things occasionally. Did you just meet someone new and you’re having a tough time remembering their name? After you’ve been reminded once or twice, the information should be easier for you to retrieve. If it’s not, the forgetfulness may be a symptom of dementia. When people repeatedly forget the same thing despite being reminded of it time and time again, it’s likely that they are suffering from the early stages of dementia.
  5. Forgetfulness is associated with being busy. If you forgot to return a phone call or make your way to a meeting because you were having a busy day, it’s probably normal forgetfulness. When we’re excessively busy, we only have room for so much information in our minds and, naturally, some things get pushed out. If you’re usually on top of things but tend to get forgetful when you’ve got too many balls in the air, fear not. This is probably normal forgetfulness. This is especially true if you remember what you were supposed to be doing later.
  6. Being able to execute self-care. If you had a crazy day and forgot five things but can still settle into a nice bath or feed yourself well at the end of the day, you’re probably experiencing normal forgetfulness. Very poor hygiene or missing meals, on the other hand, is a sign of dementia and a warning sign for Alzheimer’s.
 

Signs of Dementia​

Forgetfulness that is related to dementia is very different from “normal” forgetfulness and can be characterized by the following symptoms:

  1. Difficulty with simple tasks. If you or a loved one has a hard time remembering to pay bills, pick up spouses or children or carry out normal hygiene procedures like brushing teeth and bathing, it’s likely that this forgetfulness is a sign of dementia. This is also true for people who lose weight due to forgetting to eat or for people who gain weight because they eat many meals and forget about previous ones.
  2. Inability to remember previous memory loss episodes. Forgetting the name of the street you live on and then remembering that you’ve forgotten is one thing. Forgetting previous incidents where memory loss has been a problem, however, is an entirely different situation. If you notice that a friend or loved one is having difficulty remembering times when memory loss has been a problem, it’s likely that this is a sign of dementia.
  3. Difficulty in familiar settings. While it’s normal to get lost in new places, it’s not normal to get lost on your way home. If you notice that a friend or loved one is forgetting how to get home or to the store or cannot remember which room is the bedroom or which car belongs to him or her, these are signs of dementia.
  4. Frequently forgetting words. While it’s normal to grapple for the right word, it’s not normal to forget words altogether. If you notice that a friend or loved one cannot remember simple words, slurs words or forgets important information like a loved one’s name or birthday, it’s time to seek help. This is also true if a loved one garbles information, repeats the same words or phrases multiple times in a conversation or tells the same story over and over.
  5. Poor judgment. If forgetfulness has reached the level where the individual is making forgetful judgments that place health or safety at risk, like going out in the winter without a jacket or leaving the stove or gas on at home, there’s a high possibility that you’re dealing with dementia-like symptoms.
  6. Difficulty making decisions. If a person you love is having a hard time making simple decisions like what to eat or where to go or if they become frustrated over simple issues, it’s likely that this is dementia-related forgetfulness. Additionally, if a person you love seems to have “Forgotten” how to act in social situations or acts out in dangerous or inappropriate ways, it’s likely that these are signs of dementia.
 
It's a concern I have. When my aunt, uncle, and father were the age I am now, they were already into it. It doesn't sound like fun. Both my aunt and uncle, were exceptionally brilliant people, and I watched them just mentally drift into oblivion. They knew it was happening to them too, at least at first. MY aunt was heavily into denial about it, and kept reciting the prologue to Dante's Inferno to prove that her mind was sound. That was the worst part. When she didn't remember that she was married to a man she deeply loved for 50 years, it didn't seem so bad, because she was way beyond understanding who she ever was or that her mind was for all purposes gone. Then she just lingered without purpose or meaning for three years.
 
I we would like a thread to talk about all of this - sounds very depressing to me - if one is gonna get dementia then it will happen and talking about how you feel or might deal with it will make no difference IMO
 
My closest friend has early onset dementia and it is heartbreaking to watch. I am with her daily and some days it is worse than others. Having worked as a CNA I am very familiar with it since I took care of many people with different levels of it. I have been watching Teepa Snow's videos about it and they have helped me to understand how I can help or relate to my friend.

Do I worry about getting it myself? No, not really. I hadn't really thought about it till this question.
 
horseless carriage said:
Admitting that I am still in employment at the age of 77 doesn't exactly get me derision, but I am definitely out of step.
Forbes health states that:

"Research shows a connection between the early stages of retirement and cognitive decline, and numerous studies indicate that retirement can exacerbate a slew of mental health challenges, including anxiety and depression. However, creative hobbies and other stimulating activities can accomplish the opposite effect, reducing risk of dementia as they help keep the mind sharp. Maintaining strong personal and social connections makes a difference, too."

What work gives me is interaction with others, it's that kind of stimulus that has kept me relatively of sound mind. Having a job that I enjoy helps too. Added to that, the benefit that the extra income brings in means we can afford going to the many festivals that we enjoy. People can be annoying I readily admit, however, engaging with others, the social activity of connecting, staves off dementia, so if you will forgive me, I must get ready for work.
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Good for you! I believe working until an advanced age keeps one young as long as the physical implications aren't too stressful. I have been privileged to work from home for the last more than 20 years and recently retired for the second time. I think this retirement will take. :)

Hollydolly, thanks for the great lists. I have heard it said that if you forget exactly where you left your car in the big parking lot, don't worry. If you forget that you brought your car with you, it's time for intervention. :unsure:
 
Both my parents suffered from dementia. My Dad dealt with aphasia like Bruce Willis. My Mom developed symptoms in her early 60’s, my Dad by the time he was 70.

Consequently, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve worried that I may fall prey to it too. So far so good! But it’s always a concern. Every time I can’t find the word I want to use, forget someone’s name I was just introduced to, lose my glasses or phone, I have a momentary flash of worry.

Having just turned 70, I’m more aware than ever of monitoring my cognitive function and doing everything I can to ensure I stay sharp.
 
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Dementia runs in my family so yes, I worry about it quite a lot and research it quite a lot.
I believe what runs in my family is type III diabetes. Insulin resistance that builds for a number of years exacerbated by eating more "sweets" as we get older and carrying belly fat.
There are different causes and more studies coming out all the time.
 
Blessed said:
Does that mean you won't know what is happening if you get it? Will you be that elderly man in my Mother's care facility sitting in a wheelchair. He sat in the hall everyday crying out for his beloved "Livie", his wife. She came everyday for breakfast and dinner but he could not remember she had been there. So,true, you may not have to worry and remember it because you will be locked in prison of your own mind, never knowing what has happened. Does not change the fact you will live out your remaining days in terror.
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It really isn't terror for everyone. For some, their own inner world is blissful. It just doesn't sync with everyone else's world.
 
I think it’s good to talk about it. I took care of my grandmother that had Alzheimer’s, and later I took care of my aunt which had vascular dementia with behavioral disturbances. It was therapeutic for me to talk with others that were going through what I was as far as caregiving. My heart goes out to those that have and have to care for loved ones with dementia or Alzheimer’s.

The doctor told me once that it was harder on the caregivers than it was on the patient. But I saw how hard it was for both of them and how lost they were in the world. Yes, there were times when my aunt would be in a blissful state. But then again the same day she would be crying out, wanting to go home to her mom. At times she would get angry, and be very ugly with her words. At times she would hit care workers.

I think all we can do is to take care of ourselves, (our mind, bodies and spirits) the best we can and hope and pray that we don’t get these dreadful diseases for our own selves and our loved ones and for those that would have to take care of us. 💕
 
Sure coming down with dementia and alzheimers have crossed my mind a few times and with me leaving home at a young age I have no idea about my family health history.

I saw some of what my grandmother went through with my step grandfather and I'd really hate to put mama through that......if I can remain sane enough if and or when I get it she won't have to put up with it.
 

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