Did your birth order impact your personality?

Ralphy1

Ralphy1

Well-known Member
Proponents of birth order theory believe that whether you were first, last, in the middle, or even an only, that this shaped your personality to a great extent. I certainly buy into this theory as the only boy with three older sisters, and I know the impact it had on me which I am still trying to recover from...
 

I believe it as well. Statistically, the vast majority of leaders are the eldest or youngest child. I am the second of four and am not a leader, but child number one and 4 are. Middle children often have an identity problem. :p

Funny that all 3 of my husbands were/are eldest children. The first was the oldest of 11, the second the oldest of 4, and the final one is the oldest of 6.
 
Interesting, and the middles are definitely identity challenged by comparison. Oldest and the only are the leaders according to the research, but the youngest tend to be playful and more irresponsible rather than leaders in most cases, but they can rise up with an attitude that I will show them and be leaders at some point...
 

Ralphy1 said:
Interesting, and the middles are definitely identity challenged by comparison. Oldest and the only are the leaders according to the research, but the youngest tend to be playful and more irresponsible rather than leaders in most cases, but they can rise up with an attitude that I will show them and be leaders at some point...
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Yes, forgot about only children - they are often leaders. Youngest sibling in my family is the star of the family. He is a leader, much moreso than the oldest. If he ran for president, he'd get my vote.
 
There is an old joke that Christ didn't turn out too bad for an only child...:eek:nthego:
 
I'm the eldest of 8 , (6 Living) so what type of person is that suppose to make me?? I know myself I have always been responsible, reliable type of person, more than likely because I was responsible for the care of my younger siblings.
 
You perfectly fit a portion of the theory about being the oldest by being reliable and responsible...
 
I'm the eldest..of a second family. My elder brother from a previous marriage of my fathers' never lived with us...

I am definitely the leader in my family..my elder brother was raised basically as an only child by my grandparents and is a very quiet personality..

My daughter however, an only child is very much a leader and a go-getter.. and succesful at everything she turns her hand to..
 
Ralphy1 said:
Proponents of birth order theory believe that whether you were first, last, in the middle, or even an only, that this shaped your personality to a great extent. I certainly buy into this theory as the only boy with three older sisters, and I know the impact it had on me which I am still trying to recover from...
Click to expand...

Yes I too believe it does have a great effect Ralphy, I was the eldest of three, and found out later in life that my brother, the middle child, always felt and resented that I was favourite, and that my sister was always treated better than he was. I think the gender of the other siblings affects your personality too.
I have found many only children I have met, to be quite selfish and self absorbed, presumably because they got all the attention of their parents, but then I guess it depends on the parents attitude, as you could become quite introverted and possibly precocious?

I truly sympathise with you growing up with three older sisters :uncomfortableness:
 
Well, you probably shouldn't feel guilty for not shepherding them further due to the extenuating circumstances. I hope they survived OK...
 
I was an only child for the first 12 years of my life. I feel a bit of anger, because I was used by my parents as a little servant... Much of my teen years spend taking care of my much younger sibling, and my mother, who had a propensity for getting the vapors and taking to her bed, leaving me to cook, clean and basically run the house. In the end.. it was my male sibling who received all the accolades... I was kicked to the curb, which is what you can do to servants I guess.
 
Yes, the oldest can be put in that position and build a reservoir of resentment, my ex went thru the same thing...
 
Ralphy1 said:
Yes, the oldest can be put in that position and build a reservoir of resentment, my ex went thru the same thing...
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and it has long-lasting psychological effects. The oldest always feels "responsible" for everyone else's welfare and happiness. It's hard to shake the feeling of responsibility. If something happens, always feeling somehow at fault, and burdened with the questions of "woulda" "coulda" "shoulda". I still feel like the caretaker of everyone I love. My husband, and my kids have to deal with my hyper vigilance. I am working on stopping it, but at 66..it's a challenge.

While it's good to give a child a sense of responsibility, it certainly can be overdone.. and I'm living proof.
 
It is very hard to change one's behavior, but if you have informed them of the reason for your vigilance they can politely tell you to back off when it happens...
 
The only child does gets the benefit of all of the family resources but doesn't get to share family responsibilities, such as caring for aging parents. Definitely a very different perspective on life...
 
My stepdaughter is an only child and was spoiled. Her child is intended to be an only child as well even though she says she sometimes wished she had siblings.
 
Seems like she might repeat the cycle...
 

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