If you have chronic depression how do you describe/visualize it?

feywon

feywon

Well-known Member
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Different people will refer to their depression differently. Was reminded of this by Wil Wheaton describing his as a physical weight like the lead apron the dentist puts on us when taking x-rays. Some call it 'the Beast', or 'the Abyss'. How do you label your bouts with it? There is no right/wrong---just it can sometimes be a clue to finding coping strategies.

Wheaton also talks about how, despite being on meds for his anxieties and depression they do still occur, so finding coping strategies is relevant for us all.
 

fatboy said:
I feel like I have the lead apron on when my o.c.d ramps up!!
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Interesting and understandable.

One of the times i was at my worst (age 19, about to complete my VISTA service, living in NYC) i would sometimes get the feeling nothing was 'real' beyond what i was touching at the moment. i would withdraw inward so much only someone touching me could break the 'spell'.

i felt their touch so they were real, they walked into where-ever i was and touched me so the room became real and by extension the rest of the world.
 

And @fatboy's mention of his OCD made me realize that people may also have/use metaphors about other MH conditions: anxiety disorders, OCD, perhaps even phobias?

Because depression has been such a frequent visitor for me--i thought of it first. But share about any condition you struggle with...
 
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When depression hits me hard I feel like I m in a black pit of despair and can't even pull myself out of there .


At other times depression has been more mild and I feel like I'm walking slowly in a huge gray cloud ☁️.
 
There are people out there that we wouldn’t believe suffer from depressions of all sorts. This is one area that police have received very little training. We know how to recognize people who have or are having a depression encounter, but we don’t know how to deal with it. It isn’t unusual to just hold the person for up to 120 hours, more or less as the doctor evaluates the patient.

We allow the doctor to make the call, but many of them don’t like doing that. One doctor asked me what happens if we think the patient is OK to be released and 10 hours later he blows his brains out snd the family sues us? We shouldn’t be expected to be able to look inside the patient’s head. I can see their point.

People that are depressed are a hard read. Some can act completely normal while others act other than being normal. As a cop, you don’t know and in most cases, it’s best to just commit the patient and let the doctors evaluate the patient and use his or her her best judgment.
 
About 20 years ago, two very traumatic events close together put me into a depression. Nothing seemed interesting, I isolated myself, every moment was a struggle to be functional. I felt like life wasn't worth it anymore. I finally went the Doctor. Within 1/2 hour I was diagnosed with Depression and Anxiety disorders. I went on an anti-depressant and benzo's. That helped and my mood improved, but the side effects were not fun. I developed IBS and I was a bit of a zombie.
A few years back I changed my diet radically, started taking appropriate supplements and herbals. I no longer suffer from it. Occasionally I convince myself that this getting old and feeble isn't worth it, and those depressing thoughts and feelings return. I have been practicing Cognitive Behavior Therapy for about a year. It has been very helpful.
 
@911

True and if people had better access to mental as well as physical health care without bankrupting their families it could go long way to easing things. And they already have many responsibilities.

In part because of the stigma long attached to MH issues and in part because it's a way to feel one is coping--many with depression hide it. Some very skillfully. It is easier to hide than most other MH issues.

My daughter and i have been watching the show the Rookie with Nathan Fillion. (Of Firefly and 'Castle')

Don't know how police officers feel about it, but seems to me they do their best to address such realistically and fairly---pointing out what you discussed here about the difficulty of recognizing certain factors in human behavior.

Thing is different PDs get different levels of training---some are not even taught to recognize signs of health issues (such as Blood Sugar issues, TIAs that might have been responsible for someone's erratic driving, slow responses to commands etc.

i watch Castle by myself and was pleased to see that as unrealistic (sometimes silly) as the show can be--the writer/consultant is usually portrayed the silliest--the officers are generally portrayed with some respect while still showing them as individuals.

i've long disliked the trope that probably started with Sherlock Holmes of portraying law enforcement personnel as slow-witted buffoons that 'NEED' a PI or other non-police person to solve and fix things for them.
 
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feywon said:
Different people will refer to their depression differently. Was reminded of this by Wil Wheaton describing his as a physical weight like the lead apron the dentist puts on us when taking x-rays. Some call it 'the Beast', or 'the Abyss'. How do you label your bouts with it? There is no right/wrong---just it can sometimes be a clue to finding coping strategies.

Wheaton also talks about how, despite being on meds for his anxieties and depression they do still occur, so finding coping strategies is relevant for us all.
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Depression is terrible. Of all the diseases being examined these days, mental health is one we need to do a lot of work on. I found Americans were far ahead of the UK in terms of accepting depression as an illness. In the UK I come from a "stiff upper lip" mentality, and that's just a mask. I mean, if you're depressed, it's not like you can shrug it off.

Medications can really help, but it can be torturous trying to find the right ones for you. It can takes months and months to find the correct combination. Then on top of that, counseling or therapy is important. Sadly, getting it on the NHS is virtually impossible. So we provide half the solution, but not all.

I think one of the primary causes these days seems to be loneliness. We're to busy looking at screens to have real human contact. In the coming years AI will be at a stage where you won't know if you're talking to a human or a machine - and what then?

I believe you have to look deep into yourself and try to identify what makes you happy. Once you've done that, make that part of your every day life. For example, listening to music is something that brings me pleasure, and I listen to music most every day. But it could be crafts, just going somewhere to talk to people, or reading. Anything really.

Of course, when the dark clouds amass, and that weight sits on your chest squeezing your heart and lungs into submission, it's all easier said than done. I think all you can really do at those times is to hold on and hope it passes. But it sure helps if you have someone around you, be it a neighbor, friend, or love.
 
I've never been asked to describe my depression, but rather why am I depressed. The way I'd describe it is an overwhelming feeling of sadness, about myself and about the world. It's a sadness that is unjustifiable, illogical, and illusive. Trying to understand it for me is analogous to squinting in a gray fog trying discern some shape or shade, and finding nothing. And it's companion is lonliness.
 
I'm thinking back to 2006 when I had severe depression. I no longer felt like getting out of bed in the morning and every chore, like going to work, was just mechanical. I just went through the motions. I hurt inside. Rather than being listless, I was always agitated and nervous. If it wasn't for my partner and a good therapist I would have never made it to the other side.

The Cognitive Behavior therapy helped me tremendously. Now, when I feel down or apprehensive I just put myself in the actual situation and think how lucky I am.
 
Geeze Rose, that's awful.

I sometimes think finding somebody to grow close to for mutual support would be great. But then I think it through and realize I'm probably not up to that. I'm am very set in my ways and even fear that I might pull away as soon as the need for my support passed a pretty low threshold. Realizing this shocked me, because that wasn't what my earlier life was like. Maybe I was fooling myself?

In my case each day seems to slip away too fast. I've been trying to be more active and get more done to combat that feeling. I'm not patient enough for writing now. It might be fun to swap stories about past life events with somebody though.
 
I was scrolling and saw the 1st part of this thread title and I read it as "Comic Depression." I had to click in case I'd been missing something. :ROFLMAO:
 
Chronic depression- I've been dealing with it, on and off, since my teens. I'm 72. It does feel like carrying something heavy- Wil Wheaton is so right on with his descriptions. I admire him for talking about his mental health issues- he also seems like a heck of a nice guy.
After a zillion years of dealing with this I came to this realization- It's not negative thoughts that cause depression, it's depression that causes the negative thoughts. I believe it is a physical illness- it runs in my family, it's actually killed a couple of family members. I have no more reason than anyone else to feel sad- in fact I have a great life- but I notice that any amount of stress, even good stress, can cause a flare up. I go on and off meds and I make sure to exercise and maintain some sort of routine to keep it at bay. Exercise is so important and I am kind of worried that when I can't go and walk 4 miles a day, as I do now, that it will become intractable.
I have a 70 year old friend who gets ECT twice a year and that keeps hers at bay. I hope it doesn't come to that, but I'll do whatever I can because depression is torture. At least now it is approached medically as opposed to being considered some sort of failure of character. It's an illness, same as diabetes or any other chronic illness, and there are effective treatments out there. Best to anyone who is going though it, and if you want to commiserate give me a holler. I've gotten pretty good at handling it- I might even have useful advice (no promises on that, though!).
 
Paco Dennis said:
About 20 years ago, two very traumatic events close together put me into a depression. Nothing seemed interesting, I isolated myself, every moment was a struggle to be functional. I felt like life wasn't worth it anymore. I finally went the Doctor. Within 1/2 hour I was diagnosed with Depression and Anxiety disorders. I went on an anti-depressant and benzo's. That helped and my mood improved, but the side effects were not fun. I developed IBS and I was a bit of a zombie.
A few years back I changed my diet radically, started taking appropriate supplements and herbals. I no longer suffer from it. Occasionally I convince myself that this getting old and feeble isn't worth it, and those depressing thoughts and feelings return. I have been practicing Cognitive Behavior Therapy for about a year. It has been very helpful.
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What dietary changes did you make?
 
I describe it like a dark scary void.
Nothing feels stable.
Nothing feels reliable

It’s a void without love or acceptance
A void full of darkness & disappear
A void without hope

It’s horrific
 

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