What's your bad habit/s ?

What's your bad habit/s ?​


I've probably got hundreds, but the one that drives the lovely lady from over yonder bonkers, is me dunking my biscuits in my tea.
I do fart a lot, I try not to, but they just seem to happen.
I make a slurping sound when I drink my tea.... the lovely lady says I sound like a sink emptying.
I drive some people mad with my 'couldn't care less and happy-go-lucky' attitude.
If I wrote a book about my bad habits, it would be twice as long as 'War And Peace'. šŸ˜Š
 
PeppermintPatty said:
Bad habits?
Swearing? I swear too much
Binge eating? I try not to but do.
Coffee every morning? Iā€™m trying to cut it out.
Thinking the worst of myself?
Worrying too much?
Talking too much?
Being overly emotional?
Fault finding?

The list is endless. šŸ„“
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The bold ones: The first two are related---worry as opposed realistic preparations for potential problems (looking at situations and figuring our what you can change and how you can change it) is a useless emotion and actually grows out of not trusting oneself (and if you often think the worst of yourself, than you probably don't) to be able to either find solutions/resolutions to problems or to cope effectively with the things we can't control.

Being overly emotional is a subjective thing. (So is 'swearing too much'--but if you address other issues you may find that decreases on it's own.) Anger? Sadness? Crying empathetically about the suffering of others? Were you often told this by important figures in your life when younger?

Personally, i don't think anyone (even a parent or a spouse) has a right to dictate anyone's else emotional states. But all too often we have the voices of people we loved/admired echoing in our heads telling us we shouldn't be angry or sad about something that effected us deeply.

As a parent we can set limits on what a child may do without consequences, particularly to other living beings, when they are angry but as someone who struggled mightily for years due to suppressing emotions, i always encouraged them to find words to express their anger and figure out why they were angry.

Fault finding: With whom? Yourself? Others? Both? In any case, like other harsh judgements made about oneself it may be a product childhood conditioning. Not easy to break such habits, but it definitely doable.
 
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bobcat said:
I tend to be a rescuer. I see people with problems, and I feel compelled to help them. It may seem good on the surface, but it can be a wrong choice.
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That's one of my big ones, tho i have managed to become more selective. Some people don't want rescuing (they actually somewhat enjoy having 'problems' they blame not moving toward their stated goals on; or they get a hidden 'payoff'--like spouse of an alcoholic who leaves when the partner gets sober--because they were comfortable with dynamics of relationship and the sympathy of outsiders).

i still and probably always will do small things helpful for others that are in the moment situational, one and done. Another elder woman locked herself out of car at Post Office? Drive her home for spare key where she makes her hubby drive her back. Someone having difficulty finding a solution to a practical problem? Direct them to sources that can help if i can't.

In my youth i was often the person others called to help a third party in emotional distress. Or called me directly when they themselves were in distress. But after having 3 deeply emotionally wounded husbands i swore off long-term projects. We can't fix anything for anyone (including ourselves) unless the problem is addressed, acknowledged and the individual is ready to make a change.
 
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Have had many in my life but have broken or learned to moderate most of them:
smoking, drinking, catering to my libido when i had one. Fortunately i don't seem to have a lot of receptors for most addictive substances.

Smoking was only socially so easy for me to stop. To the chagrin of heavily addicted smokers i can be around smokers without craving it and i can have a little cigar every couple of years without wanting 'more'. Drinking in my early 20s was a self-medicating to be able to sleep without dreaming. When i recognised this i found other ways. Only had issue with it again after my mother death when i kind of emulated her for about 6 months, despite or because of our many issues as a way of 'holding on' to her.

i've never even tried to address the habit of allowing my mind to consider 'better' more efficient ways to do the things i need to do. It is a good habit that has served me well, as has meditation.

My worst one right now is getting too involved in conversations on internet when i have a 'to do' list i need to whittle down. Especially since i crossed off getting desktop computer set up in living room in way that facilitates bill paying and communications. (sigh) Working on it.
 

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