My Brother Is Dying (So What?)

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Born_To_Lose

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I got a call late Friday night that my one younger brother (by 2 years) is dying. My older brother called me and the phone call went like this.

Brother: “Hi John. How are you doing?” Me: “I’m doing fine. What’s up?” Brother: “I thought you might want to know Mikey is dying. They give him maybe a week.” Me: “Oh yeah. if I could have got my hands on him 32 years ago, I would have given him about 10 minutes.” Brother: “Yeah, well, I thought maybe you might want to know.” CLICK

The SOB tried to rape my daughter 32 years ago. I looked for him for 9 days. Lucky for him the cops got him first, otherwise, he would already been dead and I would be in state prison.
 

Born_To_Lose said:
I got a call late Friday night that my one younger brother (by 2 years) is dying. My older brother called me and the phone call went like this.

Brother: “Hi John. How are you doing?” Me: “I’m doing fine. What’s up?” Brother: “I thought you might want to know Mikey is dying. They give him maybe a week.” Me: “Oh yeah. if I could have got my hands on him 32 years ago, I would have given him about 10 minutes.” Brother: “Yeah, well, I thought maybe you might want to know.” CLICK

The SOB tried to rape my daughter 32 years ago. I looked for him for 9 days. Lucky for him the cops got him first, otherwise, he would already been dead and I would be in state prison.
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If he tried to rape your daughter, you are right not to care about him now. Glad you remained free and out of prison. This is a sad situation, hope your daughter is well today.
 
I had a sister who died over a year ago and no one except her sons, husband and husbands brother went to the funeral. Her husband's brother only was to the funeral to comfort his brother and he did not like my sister. My brother went and became upset that he was the only family member at the funeral. He called me and I comforted him, then he went home after the funeral. She was not a rapist, but she said so many lies and was so mean that no one wanted to be around her.

I sprinkled holy water in and around my house to keep her spirit away and will do it now since I am talking about her.
 

SeaBreeze said:
If he tried to rape your daughter, you are right not to care about him now. Glad you remained free and out of prison. This is a sad situation, hope your daughter is well today.
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She had to do some counseling and for months, I was the only man she would allow to touch or hug her. She wouldn’t even hug the Minister for almost a year.
 
Lawrence said:
I had a sister who died over a year ago and no one except her sons, husband and husbands brother went to the funeral. Her husband's brother only was to the funeral to comfort his brother and he did not like my sister. My brother went and became upset that he was the only family member at the funeral. He called me and I comforted him, then he went home after the funeral. She was not a rapist, but she said so many lies and was so mean that no one wanted to be around her.

I sprinkled holy water in and around my house to keep her spirit away and will do it now since I am talking about her.
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Sometimes the worse things happen inside of families and others do not know anything about it. I never told anyone about my brother, but I had to beg the newspaper to keep my daughter’s name out of their paper. She was barely undef 18, so I didn’t have to do a lot of begging.
 
Born_To_Lose said:
I got a call late Friday night that my one younger brother (by 2 years) is dying. My older brother called me and the phone call went like this.

Brother: “Hi John. How are you doing?” Me: “I’m doing fine. What’s up?” Brother: “I thought you might want to know Mikey is dying. They give him maybe a week.” Me: “Oh yeah. if I could have got my hands on him 32 years ago, I would have given him about 10 minutes.” Brother: “Yeah, well, I thought maybe you might want to know.” CLICK

The SOB tried to rape my daughter 32 years ago. I looked for him for 9 days. Lucky for him the cops got him first, otherwise, he would already been dead and I would be in state prison.
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You may have even gotten off using the “act of passion” defense. Juries are strange sometimes.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
It's a question of giving the crowd what they want.
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I used to patrol up around your area in Long Pond. I remember a really bad accident on route 115, think. It was right off of I-80. Three cars and a motorcycle. The motorcycle tried to pass all 3 cars but hit the second car causing it to roll. When the race was over, it was a mess getting everyone out. I would stop in at the race for a short time just to watch part of the race.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
It's a question of giving the crowd what they want.
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One of the things with borderline personality disorders is they think of how people will respond to their death. They also weaponize it. My mother was ready to die since I was a child. This theme comes up a lot on the forum I go to also.

The reality is often much different. The letter my mother wrote me, sent by my stepfather after she died, went in the shredder. What little I read, it was all about her. There was no service. I imagined the relief of the EMTs and hospital staff when they saw her death notice. She physically hit and grabbed both.

It sucks. Because my mother could be a good mother. But she was also an abuser. And the abuse is what stands out.
 
Firstly, my heart goes out the OP, I hope healing has occurred.

Funerals? You know, I just don't feel it. My father passed away three years ago, and of course I went to the funeral, I also did a speech. But my relationship with death is such that I think it's just a dead body. Absent a God belief, I see death as the absence of life, and nothing more. So, the whole ceremony seems over-the-top. It's for the living, right? And I don't need fancy coffins and watching it travel into the furnace.

I feel the same about my own death and funeral. I don't want a ceremony. I'd be just as happy in a paper bag put out with the garbage. I'd much rather anyone who wants to meet do so over a beer, or failing that a cup of tea. Other than that, I'll be gone, and I want everyone to carry on and be happy.
 
Judycat said:
I'd like to know if my brother died but that's as far as it goes.
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You may be able to get that information from the local SS office or have your state police run his name through INTERPOL. If they won’t, it is possible the FBI may accommodate you.
 
If you had gotten to your brother first BTL....I wouldn't be mad at ya! That's a horrible thing to subject a child to and that he's your brother made it a thousand times worse! I once worked a case of a little 3 year old who had an STD. I investigated the father (who was incarcerated), his twin brother and her mother's boyfriend, based on what the mother told me in the interview. Anyway, none of them were or had been infected.

I found out that DYFS had a case open on the family. To see this child, she looked so well cared for! The little girl caught the disease again...about a year later! Again, the mother didn't come clean. Turned out it was her brother who had been left alone with her little girl and even though he had gone to a private doctor, our investigation led us to him. I don't know if DYFS let her stay with that mother, but I feel they shouldn't have.

I've heard of people who have killed their children's abusers and either got no time or very little time. Anybody try to harm my son's children, like you said, they'd wish the cops got to them first. I doubt he'd kill the person, but they'd wish he did.
 
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911 said:
You may be able to get that information from the local SS office or have your state police run his name through INTERPOL. If they won’t, it is possible the FBI may accommodate you.
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Gemma said:
Google his name. If he died, an obituary may pop up for him. It did for me years ago, when I entered my estranged brothers name. Read the obit and learned he died in 2011.
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Thank you. I think one of his children would let me know if he passed away. I may try that, maybe not INTERPOL or the FBI, but Google sure.
 
VaughanJB said:
Firstly, my heart goes out the OP, I hope healing has occurred.

Funerals? You know, I just don't feel it. My father passed away three years ago, and of course I went to the funeral, I also did a speech. But my relationship with death is such that I think it's just a dead body. Absent a God belief, I see death as the absence of life, and nothing more. So, the whole ceremony seems over-the-top. It's for the living, right? And I don't need fancy coffins and watching it travel into the furnace.

I feel the same about my own death and funeral. I don't want a ceremony. I'd be just as happy in a paper bag put out with the garbage. I'd much rather anyone who wants to meet do so over a beer, or failing that a cup of tea. Other than that, I'll be gone, and I want everyone to carry on and be happy.
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You sound a little like my husb. He has instructed me, when its his time to go - do not spend a lot of money. Funerals are for the living.
 
OneEyedDiva said:
If you had gotten to your brother first BTL....I wouldn't be mad at ya! That's a horrible thing to subject a child to and that he's your brother made it a thousand times worse! I once worked a case of a little 3 year old who had an STD. I investigated the father (who was incarcerated), his twin brother and her mother's boyfriend, based on what the mother told me in the interview. Anyway, none of them were or had been infected.

I found out that DYFS had a case open on the family. To see this child, she looked so well cared for! The little girl caught the disease again...about a year later! Again, the mother didn't come clean. Turned out it was her brother who had been left alone with her little girl and even though he had gone to a private doctor, our investigation led us to him. I don't know if DYFS let her stay with that mother, but I feel they shouldn't have.

I've heard of people who have killed their children's abusers and either got no time or very little time. Anybody try to harm my son's children, like you said, they'd wish the cops got to them first. I doubt he'd kill the person, but they'd wish he did.
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I don’t know why I revisited this post, but I’m just in kind of a mean mood tonight. I did find out my sob brother did die from lung cancer. I hope he suffered. I know God will punish me for the hate that I have in my heart for this man, but he crossed the line and deserved anything bad that came his way. I walked and drove around for 9 days with a shotgun at my side. Had I found him, they would have had to use his DNA to identify him.
 
Born_To_Lose said:
I don’t know why I revisited this post, but I’m just in kind of a mean mood tonight. I did find out my sob brother did die from lung cancer. I hope he suffered. I know God will punish me for the hate that I have in my heart for this man, but he crossed the line and deserved anything bad that came his way. I walked and drove around for 9 days with a shotgun at my side. Had I found him, they would have had to use his DNA to identify him.
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Sounds like, even without your intervention, he suffered plenty.
 

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