Stay put or move to senior apartments?

hearlady said:
My daughter, out of the blue, asked if we wanted to go in on land and have a compound. Her and her DH were talking to another couple that did just that. It's a thing now. Supposedly saves money. We haven't talked about it since.
There would be pros and cons. Family close but in your own homes. Kid babysitting, future old people sitting. 😊

Anyone heard of this?
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Not a bad idea if you get along very well with them. They would always be close by if you needed help with anything, or needed rides to appointments, etc, later on, plus you could share some expenses. I guess one downside would be that if you ever wanted to sell your portion or downsized house, you couldn't. But if you plan to leave it to them anyway, maybe that wouldn't be an issue.
 

bowmore said:
About a year and a half ago, we discovered some beach side apartments. I was a few miles from where my wife grew up and it was like coming home for her.
We lived in a +55 MHP for about 15 years, near a smaller town of about 30,000. We are in the process of selling are home, and every time IU go up there it is like a ghost town.
Now were are close to markets and many restaurants, plus our building has an elevator-no steps to climb. There is always something going on here, whether it be people walking their dog, or on the beach. I have posted the view from my window next to my PC.
On a clear day I can see two of the Santa Barbara Channel Islands, and on a clear light I can see the flash of a lighthouse 15 miles away.

View attachment 310313
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That's fantastic Bowmore! Love that view!
 
hearlady said:
My daughter, out of the blue, asked if we wanted to go in on land and have a compound. Her and her DH were talking to another couple that did just that. It's a thing now. Supposedly saves money. We haven't talked about it since.
There would be pros and cons. Family close but in your own homes. Kid babysitting, future old people sitting. 😊

Anyone heard of this?
Click to expand...
Sounds like that interesting arrangement could be beneficial. But with that may come the role of "built in babysitter", which may or may not be desirable. Just a thought...
 

Bella said:
I'd like to sell my house and move to a smaller one-story ranch with less ground and just enough space to have a large veggie garden and room for the dog to run around. I'd love to move to a beach town, but it's looking less and less promising. I'm tired of trying to manage this place on my own.

Although it's ideal for some people, I dread the idea of living in an apartment, senior or otherwise, but that's where I might end up. At this point, I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Time is ticking, and I'll need to make a decision in the next few years.
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You know Bella, it sounds like, from your description, that the property you live on is just too much for you (Physically and financially). However, you really don't want to do apartment living, as it's just not the right fit for who you are. Beach towns are wonderful, but everyone else thinks so too, and they usually aren't very affordable.

However, perhaps living within an hour of the coast might work for occasional day trips. Maybe you could find a small cottage in a town within that distance that has a fenced-in back yard for your dog, and still room for a vegetable garden (Maybe not large one, but how many zucchinis can one person eat). If you could find that, it would drastically scale down maintenance, responsibility, and maybe give you more freedom.

All of us hate the thought of getting older, and our choices being narrowed down, but that's just reality. I'm not suggesting you give up what you want, just maybe a compromise or happy medium. It may require some openness to relocate, but if it will get you what you desire, then it's not so bad. Just my thoughts.
 
Maintaining the interior and exterior of a house can become too much. We never dreamed that there are basics that are now too difficult to do. Hire someone - easier said that done and much more expensive than you’d think. I now realize how an older person’s home can slowly deteriorate.
 
I could never tell anyone else what they should do with their future living situation .... way too many variables involved in anyone's life.

My situation, moving to a senior apartment and selling our family home after my husband died, just came about very smoothly and natural.
I think I amazed myself at the ability to do something like that.
It did take months to transition, and I did have family to lean on for support.

Weigh pros and cons of any ideas that come to mind. And good luck.
 
Jules said:
Stairs can be one of the most difficult obstacles in a home. If I were you, I’d be researching what types of one level places are available in your area. IMO, it’s better to investigate options while it’s not too difficult.
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Stairs? I once asked my doctor about the advisability of stairs. He said if I had stairs, by the time I was 80 I might fall and break my hip, but without those stairs I might not reach 80. My wife and I have a two story with stairs (14). We are up and down those stairs a dozen times a day and doing just fine. If the time comes that we are not, there is always the option of an electric stair lift.
 
ElCastor said:
Stairs? I once asked my doctor about the advisability of stairs. He said if I had stairs, by the time I was 80 I might fall and break my hip, but without those stairs I might not reach 80. My wife and I have a two story with stairs (14). We are up and down those stairs a dozen times a day and doing just fine. If the time comes that we are not, there is always the option of an electric stair lift.
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.... or exercise without the stairs is another way to go.
 
bobcat said:
You know Bella, it sounds like, from your description, that the property you live on is just too much for you (Physically and financially). However, you really don't want to do apartment living, as it's just not the right fit for who you are. Beach towns are wonderful, but everyone else thinks so too, and they usually aren't very affordable.

However, perhaps living within an hour of the coast might work for occasional day trips. Maybe you could find a small cottage in a town within that distance that has a fenced-in back yard for your dog, and still room for a vegetable garden (Maybe not large one, but how many zucchinis can one person eat). If you could find that, it would drastically scale down maintenance, responsibility, and maybe give you more freedom.

All of us hate the thought of getting older, and our choices being narrowed down, but that's just reality. I'm not suggesting you give up what you want, just maybe a compromise or happy medium. It may require some openness to relocate, but if it will get you what you desire, then it's not so bad. Just my thoughts.
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When I said I'd like to move to a beach town, living on the beach wasn't what I had in mind. Before my husband died, we checked out several areas in the vicinity. I know the locations where housing is affordable, and I know the type of house and property size that would work for me. There are some lagoon communities that are affordable, and living in the pines would be fine as well. It's close enough, so I could be at the beach in an hour or less. I've been considering my options for some time, but as I said, at this point, I haven't decided exactly what I'm going to do.
 
Bella said:
When I said I'd like to move to a beach town, living on the beach wasn't what I had in mind. Before my husband died, we checked out several areas in the vicinity. I know the locations where housing is affordable, and I know the type of house and property size that would work for me. There are some lagoon communities that are affordable, and living in the pines would be fine as well. It's close enough, so I could be at the beach in an hour or less. I've been considering my options for some time, but as I said, at this point, I haven't decided exactly what I'm going to do.
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Sorry. When you mentioned that you might end up where you didn't want to be, I guess I assumed that any options didn't seem likely. That doesn't appear to be the case.
 
bobcat said:
Sorry. When you mentioned that you might end up where you didn't want to be, I guess I assumed that any options didn't seem likely. That doesn't appear to be the case.
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No need to apologize. I know you were trying to help. I said moving to the beach was looking less promising and that even though I don't want to, I might end up in an apartment. At this point, I don't know where I'll end up.
 
My hubby passed away suddenly on the 13th and I'm thinking about this house that we've only lived 1 1/2 years in and spent over $80,000 in renovations. It's a tri-level so there's a lot of stairs. Hubby had just had a total knee replacement about a year before we moved here so stairs actually helped build up those knee muscles. At first, they were a struggle for me because we had lived in ranch homes with no stairs and no basement (we were in AZ for 10 years) but it's turned out to be good exercise for me.

However, this is a large home and a lot to maintain. It has a large yard, front and back and he enjoyed mowing and doing yard work.

Financially, I don't think I can afford to stay here, so I'll have to make some decisions, too. I've looked at patio homes here but I can't afford to buy one and rent is ridiculous. My rent would be as much as what our house payment is and utilities aren't included. I wouldn't have any maintenance or yard work or shoveling of snow.

It's a tough decision.
 
OneEyedDiva said:
Sounds like that interesting arrangement could be beneficial. But with that may come the role of "built in babysitter", which may or may not be desirable. Just a thought...
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There was a family "compound"in son's ex-wife's family. What happened there is one of the sisters got a divorce and sold her house. That meant there were now "strangers" living on the compound.

It happens you know.
 
We found out that staying in our big house was best - when we went to Florida for years
during the month of January we'd stay in a beautiful penthouse beachfront condo that was small.
When the weather was bad and we were stuck inside we got so dull from being bored...lol.

With a large house, that feeling wasn't ever there. We had plenty to keep us busy and we didn't feel like we were trapped in a little "cube".
 
I agree with everyone is different and the need to weigh the pros and cons.... for me, I'm staying in my house. I've put much labor and money into this property to make it a home, I realize the upkeep with the yard and maintenance is an ongoing necessity and if I have to use the kid's inheritance to keep it up I will, besides... I enjoy mowing, anyway.. for as long as I can.
 
I don't think it's what you'd rather have- a home, or apartment. It's what you need at the time. Do you need a three story condo, if you live only on the first floor, or a 3bdrm, 2 bath, 6 rm on 3 acres? As we age, our abilities and needs change. Right now, I can keep up my home, but when I can't, I'd need others to do it. Yet, I live in the sticks, and there just isn't "others". Then moving to a town/city with services is what I need.
 
The senior apartments near me are very nice and VERY expensive. So, I stay in my modest condo which is paid for. However, I would like more contact with people my own age, so I joined the biggest senior center in the area. I volunteer one, sometimes two days a week for a few yours so as to meet other seniors. Some days are great! Other days are boring. Life is uncertain.

One point of interest, I have lots of stairs in my house and I think of them as another way to make sure I keep my strength up. If the day comes when the stairs are the enemy of living in my own home, I will sell the place.
 
I put in for independent living because I love the extras, security, activities, all of it. But, they are so very high, that I don't want to be living by the skin of my teeth. Meaning, I can't save, live paycheck to paycheck, plus I want to be able to feel comfortable financially as well as the rest of it. I already know I have some friends there that I know.
 
fancicoffee13 said:
I put in for independent living because I love the extras, security, activities, all of it. But, they are so very high, that I don't want to be living by the skin of my teeth. Meaning, I can't save, live paycheck to paycheck, plus I want to be able to feel comfortable financially as well as the rest of it. I already know I have some friends there that I know.
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So despite your very valid concerns would you take an apartment if offered?
 

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