I read an article regarding humans are not designed to be happy

catscan said:
Written by a low achiever in life, or someone who never tried to improve their lot in life and preferred to stay in their comfort zone ... then they realised life has pased them by.

Crumbs .. I'm going to cry now that sounded so abysmally miserable and melancholic.:cry:
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I don't agree with the book, but it most certainly wasn't written by a low achiever, just the opposite in fact...have a look at the video above..
 

debodun said:
People that are always smiling make me nervous.

People that are always morose make me depressed.

Where's the middle?
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That reminds me of early morning TV. The cable news channels can be quite depressing but when I switch to one of the "good morning" shows the regulars are absolutely giddy with forced cheerfulness. Yes, where is the middle?
 

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For awhile. :)
 
You've got to remember the author is trying to sell a book from which he will make huge sums of money that will make him "unhappy"? Wake up people and get a clue. You're being taken for a ride.

I'm happy because my life has a sense of purpose and I'm getting better at something or things everyday of my life. So I am one person you know who is happy. :giggle:
 
chic said:
You've got to remember the author is trying to sell a book from which he will make huge sums of money that will make him "unhappy"? Wake up people and get a clue. You're being taken for a ride.

I'm happy because my life has a sense of purpose and I'm getting better at something or things everyday of my life. So I am one person you know who is happy. :giggle:
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I would agree with you usually Chic, but the author is already a very rich man....he's head of consultant psychiatrists in London's Harley street among others..
 
My default position is that of a cheerful optimist.
When the going gets tough enough to get me down I remember that I am not special and that other people have experienced the same difficulties that I am struggling with and have lived to tell the tale.

I also remember learning that feelings are spontaneous reactions to events that happen to us. They rise and fall away and we don't have to feel guilty if we have negative reactions such as anger, disgust, envy etc. We do not have control over them and we need not be ashamed by our feelings. They are transitory unless we choose to allow them to take root in our thoughts.

What matters is how we handle these feelings; what we choose to do about them. Do we strike out at someone who has hurt us in some way, or do we try to understand the situation more fully and maintain the relationship? If we are feeling envy, do we allow the feeling to fester or do we neutralise it by counting our blessings? If we are feeling a bit miserable, do take solace in the bottle or go outside into the sunshine, take deep breaths and listen to the birds singing and walk past flower beds drinking in the beauty on display?

Personally, I think happiness is an amazing and wonderful feeling, but it does not last. It rises and falls, like every other feeling. Contentment, on the other hand, is a state of mind, a thought process. So is gratitude.

I am content with my life and grateful for all of the love I have experienced.

"Gratitude is the memory of the heart." Mother Mary McKillop, Australia's first and only saint.
Mary McKillop is an inspiration to me. She experienced many obstacles and betrayals in her lifetime but chose to love rather than retaliate in kind.
 
fuzzybuddy said:
I guess it matters what you mean by "happy". If you mean some kind of drugged like 24/7 joy and elation- Nope. We get bored easily. We need drama, challenges, danger, and none of that sounds "happy".
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I've known people, mainly that I worked with that just seem to feed on drama. They can't get enough. And stupid talking. And they talk and talk and say nothing.
 
hollydolly said:
I don't agree with the book, but it most certainly wasn't written by a low achiever, just the opposite in fact...have a look at the video above..
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I don't know HD, a bunch of letters after a name means they paid the price of admission to the sacred grounds of higher education, it's doesn't mean they have common sense.
 
Gardenlover said:
I don't know HD, a bunch of letters after a name means they paid the price of admission to the sacred grounds of higher education, it's doesn't mean they have common sense.
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no it certainly doesn't mean someone who is intelligent has common sense... ..very often they don't... in fact this book is just his opinion... as someone said already...where did he get his info ?.. the good lord himself ?..so I wouldn't pay any attention to the book for the mere fact it's just HIS opinion...
 
Balzac said:
Is there a subtle difference between being happy and being contented? Or are they exactly the same?

How much does social media affect things? People are always being encouraged to compare themselves to others online... others who (remember) carefully manipulate their Twitter feeds etc to look better than they really are. You can only be your own kind of happy, not someone else's...
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Love your post. The article mentioned being content was not a good thing either because it means you are not growing - challenging yourself. I don't agree, nor disagree - I'm in the middle :ROFLMAO:
 
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bobcat said:
I do have some issues with the title. I don't believe we are designed or meant to be any certain way. We are simply a product of evolution which has no intent or design. That being said, I do understand that happiness is a state of mind, and there will be times in our lives we will feel happy, and other times that we do not.

The portion of the title urging us to stop trying makes no sense to me. If enjoying life with someone makes you happy, why would you stop doing that? That's nonsense.

I will say that lasting happiness belongs to those who are easily contented. So the simple way to feel happier is to want less and expect less. Every day reflect on all the things you have to be thankful for, and learn to appreciate the simple things in life. It seems the disturbers of happiness are our desires, our griefs, and our fears. Learning to manage them is a valuable life skill, and can go a long way to experiencing a more consistent level of happiness.
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In my opinion, trying to be happy is a bit much. Either you are happy at a certain moment in your life, or you are not. Happy moments come and go. They don't stick around. Thank goodness, the majority of us do have happy moments.
 
chic said:
You've got to remember the author is trying to sell a book from which he will make huge sums of money that will make him "unhappy"? Wake up people and get a clue. You're being taken for a ride.

I'm happy because my life has a sense of purpose and I'm getting better at something or things everyday of my life. So I am one person you know who is happy. :giggle:
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24/7 365 days? No one gets on your last nerve at times..even for a quick second or two :ROFLMAO: :ROFLMAO:
 
Ladybj said:
The article was quite interesting. It covered some great points.

There is actually a book called You Are Not Meant to Be Happy - So Stop Trying. I downloaded a sample of the book on my Kindle. I will check it out to see if it's worth purchasing. I tried to name 5 people that I know personally that are truly happy, I could not name one. I have more joy in my life than happiness. Happiness is temporary, joy stays around a bit longer. What are your thoughts?
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I suspected this. I don't think we can ever be happy for long.
 
catscan said:
Written by a low achiever in life, or someone who never tried to improve their lot in life and preferred to stay in their comfort zone ... then they realised life has pased them by.

Crumbs .. I'm going to cry now that sounded so abysmally miserable and melancholic.:cry:
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Actually, I am more peaceful now because I am not trying to achieve anything or impress anyone. I don't care, I just do what I want and it brings contentment and rest.
 
Maybe he's just getting ahead of Davos 2024 and its newly revised message:

"You will own nothing, and be happy. who cares if you're happy?"
 
Rose65 said:
Actually, I am more peaceful now because I am not trying to achieve anything or impress anyone. I don't care, I just do what I want and it brings contentment and rest.
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I agree ... one of the little luxuries that comes with age .

Not disimilar to 'Be true to Yourself' ... or Gnothi seauton (know thyself)
 
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