Here's a sad story, at least for our family it was. My niece and and my daughter are about the same age, mid 40's. They are 7 months apart. (I was wrong when I wrote 19) A few years ago, my niece got a bad cut on her ankle from playing in a soccer match and was kicked by a defensive player. My wife and I were on-hand to watch the match. She received medical help right away by the Trainer on site.
After a few weeks, the bad cut wasn't healing and I kept calling her and telling her to get help from a professional sports physician, but she kept thinking it would improve. After another week, she was still changing bandages as it was still seeping blood, so she went to the doctor and he told her she had an infection.
He treated it and gave her some hefty antibiotics. Still no improvement and Gangrene set in, so she was hospitalized and given bags of antibiotics intravenously. I was on my way to the dentist when I received a phone call from her crying telling me the doctor suggested amputation by removing the foot and about 4 inches above the ankle. She asked me what should she do. I suggested to immediately get her records together and get a second opinion no later than the next day, which she did. The second doctor agreed that the foot and ankle needed to come off. She was devastated. BTW, she was divorced at the time.
After the amputation, my wife and I invited her to stay with us because we knew people in our neighborhood that were medical professionals and would look in on her. One was a doctor at the Trauma Unit at the one hospital and we had a couple of RN's, PA's and NP's. My house was turned into a small hospital with everyone wanting to help and coming into my home wearing scrubs.
Several months after the amputation, the infection returned and long story short, the leg up to the hinge (patella or knee cap) had to come off. Again, she was a mess and this time, I had to call in a favor from a psychologist I knew to come to my house and speak with her. She was able to get her to understand the direness of the situation and she agreed to have half of her leg removed. She told my niece that when she heals, they will fit her with a prosthetic and when she is dressed, she will look as normal as anyone else. I wanted her to have a female psychologist because I could always tell she was more comfortable with a female therapist.
This was again devastating to her. She kept calling herself a "freak." No matter what we said or anyone in the medical profession told her, she couldn't overcome the loss of her leg and the events leading up to it. She decided to return to her house, even though I thought she should stay with us longer. She said she overstayed her welcome and wanted to get back home, which was only maybe 5 miles away. I even begged her to stay because I knew she wasn't accepting the change to her body psychologically. I also brought her dog over, which we never allowed her breed of dog into our house. A big Rottweiler. She liked us, but we never trusted her.
We got a phone call a few weeks later after she went home from her daughter that she committed suicide. No letter or note was left behind. The Coroner ruled it a suicide, but I wasn't OK with that, so I asked for an inquest. He asked why. I told him that because he stated in the autopsy that she died from an overdose of narcotics, I was suggesting it could just as well have been an accident. He agreed to hold an inquest and to allow the presentation of witnesses and evidence to the contrary.
I hired a top Forensic Psychiatrist and a Forensic Pathologist that you probably have seen on TV a few times. I spent a lot of my own money to bring them in and study her case. I wanted to know the truth. On the day of the Inquest, the Coroner, who I thought was my friend, accused me of wanting to show him up in the papers and make a mockery of him as a Coroner. That never even entered my mind. I only wanted to get to the bottom of how my beautiful niece had died. I needed to know because I was really hurting inside and felt some guilt from not being able to talk her into staying with us until she was 100% psychologically stable, which I doubted at the time.
Both of the subpoenaed witnesses gave great testimony. The Coroner stood alone on his findings. Evidence was presented by the witnesses that helped to sway the jury. The Inquest started at 1:30 in the afternoon and ended at just after 5 p.m. The jury was given until 8 that evening to come to a conclusion or the Judge said he would send them home and continue the next day. Just after 7, they reached a decision. They found that she died from an "Accidental Overdose." The Coroner changed the manner of death to "Accidental" with prejudice, which means, case closed.
I asked 2 of the jurors how they arrived at their decision. They agreed that because no note or letter was left, her dog was not given or left in the care to anyone in case she died suddenly (she loved that dog) and she didn't give away any of her possessions, including her expensive jewelry. It was likely that she wasn't planning on suicide. The Psychiatrist said that the vast majority of suicide victims do these things and she didn't do even one.
The Pathologist stated on the stand that there is no way that anyone can know if she was aware of what time she took her pills and may have forgotten because of her state of mind and may have taken them twice and she also drank wine immediately after taking her pills, which can escalate the strength of the drugs. He said that people that have their minds locked in on one issue can end up in a fog and unknowingly take pills thinking they hadn't.
The Coroner didn't have much to say. He only spoke about the levels of morphine in her body and the amount of alcohol, which was minimal. He stated that there were no unexplained bruises, cuts or scratches. Her liver was minimally inflamed, but no other signs of Hepatitis were present. Overall, she appeared to be in good health.
I apologize for the long post.
We are masters of adaptation. I will keep going ( don't give up or stop ) and learn new ways each day.
