Older men dating younger women and visa versa.

LadyEmeraude

LadyEmeraude

on vacation, back in September.
Do huge age gaps really matter?

Of course it does not matter either way,
just that many people have strong opinions
about the overall topic.

What are the reasons that you can think of
about why either male or female chose to
date much younger in years?

Open topic for chat~

 

Over the dating years in my lifetime I myself
generally stayed close to my age when dating,
more often a male or maybe three years older
than myself.
 

Dating topics don't do well here. Married people jump in and give their opinions and judge others even though they've had no dating world experience in the last 20 years or more. The population here also skews way old, past the point of any normal dating motivations.

Any mention of legitimate serious factors a guy would consider leads to cries of misogyny and demonization.
 
dilettante said:
Dating topics don't do well here. Married people jump in and give their opinions and judge others even though they've had no dating world experience in the last 20 years or more. The population here also skews way old, past the point of any normal dating motivations.

Any mention of legitimate serious factors a guy would consider leads to cries of misogyny and demonization.
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Might be sensitive thread then, well it will unfold as it may, and maybe no posts
from others will occur then.

As for me, I am off for my workday and will pop in later tonight to browse
this topic if any further posts are on it ;)

As for myself I think members should say what they have on their minds and
just go from there. It's all ok with me..
 
Interesting topic. It is strange that I already thought about it this day before you've started the thread.

I think if the age gap is only small, as two or three years, maybe five, I don't see any problems with it. But if one partner is 15, 20 or more years older I doubt that such relationships will last.

If you read of them ore watch YT videos I'm quite sure that these are exceptions but not the rule.
If you ask me, if I at 20 years would have dated a female who is 40 or older, I don't think so. Of course there are a lot of older men in politics or showbiz who have relationships with very young women, but the reason for most of the woman is more the money than love. The same with older women and very young men.
 
Well, let's look at what appears to be the usual assumption.

The difference matters, so let's perhaps consider this from the perspective of, say, a 20 year difference or more. I'm also a guy, so can't speak much from a woman's point of view.

Generally, I'd say you'd quickly hear the comment that "she is only with him for his money". But why would a man want to be with a younger woman? I actually think this is obvious, isn't it? Youthful beauty is compelling. Hell, we've all lived through a phase where we were dating as teenagers and the like, and there's an innocence and beauty there that slowly gets chipped away by time (which is natural).

Also, some older women - and men - become stuck in their ways, bitter, resentful, and just not much fun to be around. A younger person can set fire to the lethargy and reignite passion. I'm an oldster, but if I close my eyes and try to think of a beautiful woman, I'd admit she'd be younger than myself. Not that I'm in the dating scene!

I don't think there's much mystery here, to be honest.
 
My significant other is more than 5 years younger than me. It definitely has its advantages. He’s full of energy and is busy from the beginning of the day until the end.
He does LOTS of things for me that I just can’t do, like fix cars, cuts down trees for firewood, fixes things in our house that needs doing. He’s very useful. lol Plus he’s fairly easy on the eyes. 😁
 
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Aunt Bea said:
I don’t see anything wrong with it as long as everyone goes into it with open eyes and is honest about what they expect to get out of the relationship. YOLO! 😉🤭😂
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Exactly, that's the crucial point. I know some of these 'cases' by person.

#1: A physician in his late 50s who got a divorce from his wife (same age as him) and after it had a young women studying medicine as partner. Only some years later he noticed that she was only interested in his knowledge on a very special medical branch and of course his vast literature about it. The affair ended and he said: "Better alone than badly accompanied".

#2: A former female colleague, she 66 years old, her friend 51. They had a long-distance relationship, he 400 kilometres (250 miles) away. Every second or third weekend he came over. But on Christmas he didn't come. He lived at the village where his former girlfriend (as he said) lived and never introduced the two women to each other, although the older one was visiting him there every now and then. This lasted for two or three years and she always believed she could persuade him living together. This didn't happen, thus after three years she moved away that the distance is now about 900 kilometres (560 miles).

#3: Happening in the kinship. He had an affair with a 15 year younger neighbor the next door. His wife suggested marriage counseling. He refused and quit the marriage. He is now married since 16 years with his younger partner. He is 77, she 62 and he shortly said to me "Unfortunately my little friend is sleeping". As he began the affair he was younger and it was new and thrilling, but now she obvioulsly is still expecting se.ual intimacy, but he isn't capable anymore.
 
dilettante said:
Dating topics don't do well here. Married people jump in and give their opinions and judge others even though they've had no dating world experience in the last 20 years or more. The population here also skews way old, past the point of any normal dating motivations.

Any mention of legitimate serious factors a guy would consider leads to cries of misogyny and demonization.
Click to expand...

As someone who hasn't dated in over 40 years, what would I know? On the other hand I have opinions like anyone else but not many judgements. I never expect anyone else should see things as I do. Sometimes I wish they would where public policy is concerned but as for their own personal private choices I'm a big believer in the Golden Rule. It isn't any of my damned business. ;)

PeppermintPatty said:
My significant other is more than 5 years younger than me. It definitely has its advantages. He’s full of energy and is busy from the beginning of the day until the end.
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My wife is 10 years my senior. At 30 and 40 it mattered not at all. at 70 and 80 it matters more as we both fall apart on our own trajectory. The idea of being with someone older never had any special appeal and the idea of being with someone much less mature has no appeal at all in terms of a relationship. But those are just my unsought opinions .. like all the others.
 
Pepper said:
V.I.A.G.R.A.?
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It isn't safe for an awful lot of older men. See https://www.drugs.com/tips/******-patient-tips - oops, that link has been censored!

It also has little direct impact on pleasure or assist in following through to "completion" - which it can block entirely in many men. It works by improving blood flow "down there," not by changing mood. As such, it may not work if you don't feel attracted to your partner or don't feel interested in sex.
 
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