Some people seem to have bad luck follow them around.

oscash said:
I was in a coffee shop with a friend today when a young lady with a small child in a pram sat down next to us. A friendly conversation began, and I asked her the name of the baby and old she was. She told me the name was Hanna and she was 16 months old and was expecting another boy in 6 weeks' time. She said she had another 4 children at home being looked after by parents-in-law. She then went on to tell us their home got burnt down 3 months ago without insurance.
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She learned the value of having insurance.
oscash said:
She said she was Turkish/Lebanese. I asked her if she was getting any help from her community, and she said some had helped. The government don't seem to help much.
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Arabs help each other, believe me. They know how to network. Unless this woman did something to shame or really embarrass her family, she'll get plenty of help.

And they don't normally turn to the gov't for this kind of help. A lot of Arabs who have immigrated to a western country don't even know that help for personal disasters is available through gov't programs.
oscash said:
I can't stop thinking about her .
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I've worked with Arabs, and I've hired Arabs to work for me. They have each other's backs. They believe their god rewards the wealthy among them for assisting the unfortunate among them. She'll be fine, honestly. Unless she did something really shiddy...like marry an Australian. ;)
 

chic said:
You mean buying a coffee is frivolous? Maybe she was meeting somebody there? It can happen. It needn't mean she is wasting her own money on coffee. There could be any one of a multitude of reasons. :unsure:
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Yes. If you’re that poor, it is. I’ve been there. You’re right that someone may have been buying it for her.

I believe in living by a philosophy of not buying anything I can’t afford.
 

chic said:
You mean buying a coffee is frivolous? Maybe she was meeting somebody there? It can happen. It needn't mean she is wasting her own money on coffee. There could be any one of a multitude of reasons. :unsure:
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Very true. There can be multiple reason for an identical behavior. For example, a person might go to a movie theatre for the following diverse reasons:

1. To watch the film for entertainment purposes
2. As a hit man waiting for an intended victim
3. To evade the the sudden foul weather outside.
4. To get respite from an argumentative spouse?
5. To evade the police?
6. To keep suspected criminal under surveillance
7. For movie review purposes
8. To make sure a paid advertisement is being shown
9. Watching a suspected spouse
10. To evade a stalker
 
Jules said:
Yes. If you’re that poor, it is. I’ve been there. You’re right that someone may have been buying it for her.

I believe in living by a philosophy of not buying anything I can’t afford.
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I've never, ever bought a coffee in a "coffee shop," a few time from McDonalds when I was traveling. I buy big cans of Kroger coffee for 5.99 that makes 225 cups, that's less than 3 cents a cup. A large cup of fancy coffee at Starbucks can be $5.00.
 
Murrmurr said:
She learned the value of having insurance.

Arabs help each other, believe me. They know how to network. Unless this woman did something to shame or really embarrass her family, she'll get plenty of help.

And they don't normally turn to the gov't for this kind of help. A lot of Arabs who have immigrated to a western country don't even know that help for personal disasters is available through gov't programs.

I've worked with Arabs, and I've hired Arabs to work for me. They have each other's backs. They believe their god rewards the wealthy among them for assisting the unfortunate among them. She'll be fine, honestly. Unless she did something really shiddy...like marry an Australian. ;)
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Murrmurr: The only thing I picked up on her story was, she said one child had blond hair like her Turkish Father and the others had brown hair like their Lebanese father, which makes me think she has 2 husbands as some of the Muslim men have more than one wife? The more I think about it the more questions I should have asked. She said the Salvation Army offered her furniture, but she had to find her own home.
 
chic said:
You mean buying a coffee is frivolous? Maybe she was meeting somebody there? It can happen. It needn't mean she is wasting her own money on coffee. There could be any one of a multitude of reasons. :unsure:
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She just bought a small coffee for $4,50 and then left after some time.
 
oscash said:
Murrmurr: The only thing I picked up on her story was, she said one child had blond hair like her Turkish Father and the others had brown hair like their Lebanese father, which makes me think she has 2 husbands as some of the Muslim men have more than one wife? The more I think about it the more questions I should have asked.
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She may have been divorced and remarried. That's allowed in many mostly Muslim countries. But maybe she meant her father, the child's grandfather.
oscash said:
She said the Salvation Army offered her furniture, but she had to find her own home.
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Just like with anyone in the US who lost everything in a fire.


If she and/or her husband go to a mosque, they'll get the help the clerisy feels they deserve. If they're in good standing with their community and family, they will get the help they need.
 
chic said:
I think the woman in the OP's post had more children than she could afford and that's always a problem. Responsible family planning is so important.
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Reminds me of these two Pentecostal ladies in our neighborhood who seemed to be in some type of birthing-babies competition. Both claimed that babies were gifts from God. They would proudly stand conversing almost belly to belly at the housing project's lobby entrance balcony. Finally, one of them gave up while the other kept going like a real trooper. Think she had three more before she finally threw in the towel.
 
Do they have bad luck or do they chronically make bad choices? I've never been big on the concept of luck. If I were driven along that line then I might have indulged in gambling, which I don't. I do know that I have been spared an untimely death a number of times, but I don't explain it by good or bad luck. I just can't get hung up on that concept.
 
TennVet said:
Do they have bad luck or do they chronically make bad choices? I've never been big on the concept of luck. If I were driven along that line then I might have indulged in gambling, which I don't. I do know that I have been spared an untimely death a number of times, but I don't explain it by good or bad luck. I just can't get hung up on that concept.
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True. An example is how Putin is presently suffering the negative consequences of his choices.
 
TennVet said:
Do they have bad luck or do they chronically make bad choices? I've never been big on the concept of luck. If I were driven along that line then I might have indulged in gambling, which I don't. I do know that I have been spared an untimely death a number of times, but I don't explain it by good or bad luck. I just can't get hung up on that concept.
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That's right! What's that saying ... you make your own luck!
 
There was a character in the Li’l Abner comic strip who was literally followed around by a dark cloud. He had good intentions, but was regarded as the world’s worst jinx. Does anyone remember Li’l Abner? It was quite popular in the American northeast in the 1960’s, and was wickedly satirical. Al Capp was a comic genius!

IMG_2468.jpeg

( I kinda feel like this during my depressive jags! At times the character appears barefoot, and at other times he wears shoes, but with holes in the soles…)
 
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I know a woman who lost both her children on the same day when they were teenagers. A drunk driver hit the car they were in. What were her bad choices that caused that?

Some people look at the unfortunate and say it's their own fault for making bad choices, and some go so far as to look at a child with disabilities and say it must be karma from bad choices he made in a previous life. I think that attitude is just an excuse to withhold sympathy.

Whether you call it bad luck or being dealt a bad hand, I do think we need to help those people any way we can, through our own efforts and with government safety nets.
 
Radrook said:
Reminds me of these two Pentecostal ladies in our neighborhood who seemed to be in some type of birthing-babies competition. Both claimed that babies were gifts from God. They would proudly stand conversing almost belly to belly at the housing project's lobby entrance balcony. Finally, one of them gave up while the other kept going like a real trooper. Think she had three more before she finally threw in the towel.
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I had some relatives who were very religious (So. Baptist IIRC), they were sisters to each other and said they believed that every child they gave birth to would be another jewel in their crown when they got to heaven.

So these two were competing with each other over who'd have the most jewels in their heavenly crown. And get this: one of the sisters would go through a total personality change when she was pregnant; not just mood swings that a lot of of pregnant people get but scary, screaming, yelling, hitting anyone within reach, threatening to kill someone the entire time she was pregnant.

But she persisted and had 8 kids and was furious when she found out she wouldn't be able to have anymore because all she cared about was the stupid jewels in her stupid crown.
 
Della said:
Whether you call it bad luck or being dealt a bad hand, I do think we need to help those people any way we can, through our own efforts and with government safety nets.
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Sounds good.

So when are you going to begin signing over your income to a local rescue mission or homeless shelter? Or declaring that all of your taxes should be spent on the same?

After all who needs road maintenance, snow clearing, environmental cleanup, drainage, parks, police, fire fighters, animal control, soldiers and their equipment and food, and on and on and on?

People already do help individually and through many government programs they finance.

And picking an example that doesn't fit still doesn't justify poor choices in life.
 
officerripley said:
So these two were competing with each other over who'd have the most jewels in their heavenly crown. And get this: one of the sisters would go through a total personality change when she was pregnant; not just mood swings that a lot of of pregnant people get but scary, screaming, yelling, hitting anyone within reach, threatening to kill someone the entire time she was pregnant.
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'Pregnant people', I ❤️ that phrase.
 
dilettante said:
Sounds good.

So when are you going to begin signing over your income to a local rescue mission or homeless shelter? Or declaring that all of your taxes should be spent on the same?

After all who needs road maintenance, snow clearing, environmental cleanup, drainage, parks, police, fire fighters, animal control, soldiers and their equipment and food, and on and on and on?

People already do help individually and through many government programs they finance.

And picking an example that doesn't fit still doesn't justify poor choices in life.
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Just because I believe we should help people doesn't mean I think we should give so much that we ourselves are in need of help. You sure did make a lot of assumptions from me saying I'm in favor of helping people.

My husband spends four mornings a week volunteering at a food and clothing bank that helps homeless people and all year he does people's taxes for free. This year he's done over a thousand taxes. This helps people who need them to be able to receive benefits. He gives of his time, I give of my money. I should probably do much more.

Neither do I think that because some of our taxes should go toward helping people that I think we should neglect any of those other uses you listed.

Yes, I would gladly pay higher taxes to cover all this and I vote accordingly.

Yes, I picked an example of someone whose bad luck is not the result of bad choices. Why wouldn't I? That was my point! If you're only talking about some certain thing then you should say so. If you're talking about people having more children than they can care for I wouldn't include them in a discussion about bad luck at all. That's a whole different subject.
 
Della said:
I know a woman who lost both her children on the same day when they were teenagers. A drunk driver hit the car they were in. What were her bad choices that caused that?

Some people look at the unfortunate and say it's their own fault for making bad choices, and some go so far as to look at a child with disabilities and say it must be karma from bad choices he made in a previous life. I think that attitude is just an excuse to withhold sympathy.

Whether you call it bad luck or being dealt a bad hand, I do think we need to help those people any way we can, through our own efforts and with government safety nets.
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The bad choice was made by the drunk who was driving under the influence. It is very sad that her children were victims, I just can't measure luck as a factor.
 
Have u seen people set up outside of a grocery store with a violin or other instrument and a sign stating that they need help. They appear to play their instruments while music comes out of a large speaker. They're not actually playing the music, though. When the police or the store managers ask them to leave, the music is still playing but they are not holding their instruments. Scam scam scam
 
Fyrefox said:
There was a character in the Li’l Abner comic strip who was literally followed around by a dark cloud. He had good intentions, but was regarded as the world’s worst jinx. Does anyone remember Li’l Abner? It was quite popular in the American northeast in the 1960’s, and was wickedly satirical. Al Capp was a comic genius!

View attachment 364724

( I kinda feel like this during my depressive jags! At times the character appears barefoot, and at other times he wears shoes, but with holes in the soles…)
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That cartoon reminds me of when I asked this fellow if the weatherman was calling for rain that day, and raining started just from above me. He burst out laughing and saying "Well, the weatherman did now!" No, it was not raining on everyone there. Just on me.
 

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