Nuclear family or Extended which one would you really prefer??

S

smiley

Senior Member
Location
Australia
Most of us have lived through both - we can see the advantages and disadvantages - I do hear that even in the ME the extended family structure is slowly breaking apart? that surprised me. there seems to lots of lonely peoples living alone [and it may suit some] but have we lost a bit of family magic??

ps: try to be very honest with your answer - no skirting around the bush!
 

smiley said:
Most of us have lived through both - we can see the advantages and disadvantages - I do hear that even in the ME the extended family structure is slowly breaking apart? that surprised me. there seems to lots of lonely peoples living alone [and it may suit some] but have we lost a bit of family magic??

ps: try to be very honest with your answer - no skirting around the bush!
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Magic? What magic?
Both of our fathers are gone. Both of our mothers were "my way", bread winners and live now in their worlds. It does not matter what we do, achieve or do for them. We are their Amazon shop.
Both have a younger sister. SO's told me years ago that I am not family and she will discuss family matters with her brother only. Mine has always gone from fire to ice and back. Her husband controls her. Our way of life does not meet her approval.
All four will receive all the support we can provide if asked. No thank you required.
SO's extended family knows how to reach him when they need something. I contacted several cousins, aunts/uncles over the course of the last couple of years. The only term that comes to mind is " small people". Keeps the Christmas list short.
Our small circle works for us.
 
all valid comments within themselves - haven't looked at the stats lately but if you look at a chart of religious groups and numbers around the world they are pretty substantial still and given that no one has produced living seeable proof of a God then most of us hang onto a "gut" feeling about it all?

Over time I've done a lot of research into religion usually christian sort - sorta digging under the roots of the bible for example. but in the end it comes down to our own findings and beliefs - no one can necessarily convince you about anything - I think we all need to work it out ourselves with trembling and curiosity. But there is always values in sharing notes with others and having a few discussions along the way - the face to face ones are probably the best with those you at least have some respect for?
 
smiley said:
all valid comments within themselves - haven't looked at the stats lately but if you look at a chart of religious groups and numbers around the world they are pretty substantial still and given that no one has produced living seeable proof of a God then most of us hang onto a "gut" feeling about it all?

Over time I've done a lot of research into religion usually christian sort - sorta digging under the roots of the bible for example. but in the end it comes down to our own findings and beliefs - no one can necessarily convince you about anything - I think we all need to work it out ourselves with trembling and curiosity. But there is always values in sharing notes with others and having a few discussions along the way - the face to face ones are probably the best with those you at least have some respect for?
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Twostep said:
I left the Catholic church once I was old enough. Met my religious ed teacher when I did so. I never turned the Parrish Chaplan in for abuse. It would have done no good to me but damage to family. But I watched him until the end.
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sorry to hear that it is an abomination to God ; a sin and as you know there are no quick solutions - healing takes time - but God is always there - so where doesn't he step in and stop it - can't really answer that one - apart that in the very beginning when humans were created God did say - I give you all free will - unfortunately some goes wrong also
 
I’m not sure that I understand the question.

I’m on my own and would prefer to be dependent on the taxpayers for my end of life care than my family.

The idea of a warm and caring extended family providing elderly family members with a warm and loving home in their final days has been romanticized but I’m not sure that it has been an accurate picture for many.
 
Aunt Bea said:
I’m not sure that I understand the question.

I’m on my own and would prefer to be dependent on the taxpayers for my end of life care than my family.

The idea of a warm and caring extended family providing elderly family members with a warm and loving home in their final days has been romanticized but I’m not sure that it has been an accurate picture for many.
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'' The idea of a warm and caring extended family providing elderly family members with a warm and loving home in their final days has been romanticized but I’m not sure that it has been an accurate picture for many.''

My personal opinion and say this based only on local house plumbing jobs I have done but a lot of jobs is sadly you are correct.
 
NotCompSavy said:
'' The idea of a warm and caring extended family providing elderly family members with a warm and loving home in their final days has been romanticized but I’m not sure that it has been an accurate picture for many.''

My personal opinion and say this based only on local house plumbing jobs I have done but a lot of jobs is sadly you are correct.
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I think that's correct too. People keep having fewer and fewer kids, so a lot of the time there just aren't enough family members to go around who can/are willing to take care of elderly relatives. And another thing that can make it difficult: hardly anybody seems anymore to have just one old mother and one old father who are still married to each other to take care of; lots of times, the parents are divorced, so now you're going to need two extra bedrooms if they move in with you. And if they've remarried? And their spouses' families can't/won't help? (I know firsthand about this some; over a ten year period, I was mostly the only person stepping up to help 2 biological parents and 2 step-parents. Not fun.)
 

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