LadyEmeraude
Well-known Member
What do you think? What kind of love? Sounds complicated to me.
Same for can a woman love two men at the same time?
Same for can a woman love two men at the same time?
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Can a man love two women at the same time?
- Thread starter LadyEmeraude
- Start date
Gardenlover
The world needs more love
Sounds like a familiar thread.
Yes, I think it is possible.
To play the devils advocate: wife, mother, daughters, granddaughters, nieces, girlfriends, etc.
Yes, I think it is possible.
To play the devils advocate: wife, mother, daughters, granddaughters, nieces, girlfriends, etc.
PeppermintPatty
š¢. š³. š¢
- Location
- Canada
Yes I think itās possible.
Lawrence00
Senior Member
I prefer a polyamory trio of women. When two argue, the third referees and I stay blissfully uninvolved.
oscash
Senior Member
- Location
- Sydney - Australia
I had a friend at work, many years ago. She was engaged to a lovely man, and she also had a lover whom she met in the lunch hour for a quickie. We all thought she was disgusting. It's a pity her husband to be didn't know about the Loverboy as I'm sure
he would have dumped her. No, she married him and made his life unbearable.
he would have dumped her. No, she married him and made his life unbearable.
I think you have different levels of love.
In a case of a widow for example she may still love a deceased spouse and find new love with another. Not exact same time but still strong feelings.
We may love someone in a more platonic way for example an ex-spouse who you shared a life/ perhaps kids with but have no romantic feelings anymore and someone you have a strong romantic love or perhaps that is more lust.
either way I do not think the intensity of love is equal perhaps one fading as a new one blooms.
In a case of a widow for example she may still love a deceased spouse and find new love with another. Not exact same time but still strong feelings.
We may love someone in a more platonic way for example an ex-spouse who you shared a life/ perhaps kids with but have no romantic feelings anymore and someone you have a strong romantic love or perhaps that is more lust.
either way I do not think the intensity of love is equal perhaps one fading as a new one blooms.
My response is more non-traditional. I had a gay partner of 6 years in the 80's. We had a home together. We eventually split up because we were both young and were moving in different directions. His name was Angel, for reference.
I met my current hubby almost 10 years later, but I still kept in touch with Angel. In fact, hubs and I used to get together with him and his new partner. I never stopped loving Angel but I knew we would never be a couple again. He came to my father's funeral 12 years after we'd split up. That's love. So, yes, I guess it's possible to love two people under certain circumstances.
Along these lines, I would imagine there a quite a few straight "exes" who still love each other but have moved on with other spouses.
I met my current hubby almost 10 years later, but I still kept in touch with Angel. In fact, hubs and I used to get together with him and his new partner. I never stopped loving Angel but I knew we would never be a couple again. He came to my father's funeral 12 years after we'd split up. That's love. So, yes, I guess it's possible to love two people under certain circumstances.
Along these lines, I would imagine there a quite a few straight "exes" who still love each other but have moved on with other spouses.
Born_To_Lose
Member
- Location
- Worldwide
Do you mean a āMĆ©nage Ć Trois?ā I may be interested in giving it a go.
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outlander
Member
- Location
- southern Arizona
I don't know about other people, but when I fall in love with a woman all others cease to exist. Not talking about family members of course.
OneEyedDiva
SF VIP
- Location
- New Jersey
Yes! I've loved two men at the same time (and they both loved me), though I never got physical with the one who was not my partner. Having such deep feelings for them both was agonizing at times because I knew I could never be with man #2. I wouldn't cheat on my partner, so kept the relationship with man #2 in the friend zone. We respected each other as such and still stay in touch, though not on a regular basis.
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superb emotional/hormonal whatever control!!
jujube
SF VIP
I still have a little corner of my heart that belongs to my first boyfriend, who is to this day one of my best friends. We didn't make good romantic partners but I love him as a friend.
Of course, I still love my late husband.
And I love my present partner, the Spousal Equivalent.
So, yeah, I love three men at once.
Of course, I still love my late husband.
And I love my present partner, the Spousal Equivalent.
So, yeah, I love three men at once.
horseless carriage
Well-known Member
Two partners is scary enough.................................................but two mother-in-laws!!
Aunt Bea
SF VIP
- Location
- Near Mount Pilot
I donāt think that there is any limit on the number of people a person can love.
Monogamy is a difficult choice under the best of circumstances.
Choosing to be with someone is not a single choice itās a constant barrage of choices under all sorts of circumstances and situations every day of your life for not just one person but for two people, what are the odds of that?
Some take it seriously, some donāt, and even the best occasionally slip up and make a mistake.
Iām not sure that monogamy is a natural way to live and may be more of a man made idea to promote public health, religion, etcā¦
Why should something that seems so simple on the surface end up being so complicated, frustrating, painful, and confusing in practice.
Monogamy is a difficult choice under the best of circumstances.
Choosing to be with someone is not a single choice itās a constant barrage of choices under all sorts of circumstances and situations every day of your life for not just one person but for two people, what are the odds of that?
Some take it seriously, some donāt, and even the best occasionally slip up and make a mistake.
Iām not sure that monogamy is a natural way to live and may be more of a man made idea to promote public health, religion, etcā¦
Why should something that seems so simple on the surface end up being so complicated, frustrating, painful, and confusing in practice.
Grailhunter57
New Member
- Location
- Farmington, Mo
Historical marriage arrangements......
The Jews practiced polygamy. They could have as many wives as they could afford. Lived in tents and one room homes mostly, so sex was not that private. In the Book of Ruth you see one of their customs when she ask for him to put a corner of his cloak over her. The wife would get nude and the man's garments would drape down offering some modesty.
Either way one woman was not expected to keep up with a man's sex drive and or need for affection. And she did not have a choice when he needed some.....women were property. Mosaic Law allowed fathers to sell daughters as concubines----sex slaves. And a man could have wives and concubines, and it all was condoned and regulated under Mosaic Law.
The Greco-Roman relationships were about having one wife and her children were legitimate heirs. BUT, he could have separate sexual encounters with women and men and prostitutes.
Christian relationships are monogamous. So a man's needs fall on one woman. And usually the female starts to lose her passion for her husband. Of course kids and life are a factor. But the end result is the husband is neglected. Less touching less tongue kisses less sitting on his lap and less enjoying each other.
The 7 year itch....Wife's sex drive cools after the first year and the husband in love with her hopes for the best but eventually he wants to make love with a woman that is passionate and wants to make love to him. But it is a cyclic disaster because if he leaves his wife for his mistress she it is likely that she will go through the same cycle. Even if a husband communicates his needs and explains if she can't enjoy making love to him, he will divorce her, she will usually choose divorce.
It is called alienation of affection in court. And it is about affection as a whole. Sure it is about sex but it also about love and affection and wanting to touch and talk to each other. It is about passionate kisses and touching and spooning and cuddles and communication. The word intercourse means communication.
There is a norm here....God put it in a man's mind to want to look at beauty and to see and touch and kiss twin firm roundnesses. Male sex drives are primitive and repetitive....almost like toys. The Bible says, let her breasts always satisfy you. But the wife gets tired of having her toys played with. Female sex drives are far more complicated. Young girl's sex drives involve environment.... they are attracted to cars and social standing....and then of course looks.
The female sex drive generate energy for primping, when the sex drive dwindles the energy for that goes away. Now to answer the question...can men and women love more than one person? It happens all the time....the wife loves the husband as a family unit and a provider almost platonic. And she loves her lover because she enjoys making love to him. And men may not want to break up the family unit in order to have affection and maybe is in love with his mistress.
Of course there are other scenarios....men and women fall out of love.
Bottom line.....not everybody has it in them to be in love....To want that other person for the rest of their lives and that person is more important to them than even themselves. And both persons feel the same way. One way love does not work. Crazy stuff "in love" is, because nothing is more important than the person you love. And it is the other person that makes you whole.....soulmate. But for most of us that is what we want. But how can we tell if it real?
We can't know the future....and like I have tried to explain, marriages that end a lot of times are not either one's fault....But even if you get a divorce and children are involved it is better to have a "friendly" divorce and remain as an extended family. Divorce lawyers are about hate and you pay them to destroy your life and lives of your children. And to the men I say, you loved her enough to marry her and she is the mother of your children, always treat her with respect and love, married or not.
The Jews practiced polygamy. They could have as many wives as they could afford. Lived in tents and one room homes mostly, so sex was not that private. In the Book of Ruth you see one of their customs when she ask for him to put a corner of his cloak over her. The wife would get nude and the man's garments would drape down offering some modesty.
Either way one woman was not expected to keep up with a man's sex drive and or need for affection. And she did not have a choice when he needed some.....women were property. Mosaic Law allowed fathers to sell daughters as concubines----sex slaves. And a man could have wives and concubines, and it all was condoned and regulated under Mosaic Law.
The Greco-Roman relationships were about having one wife and her children were legitimate heirs. BUT, he could have separate sexual encounters with women and men and prostitutes.
Christian relationships are monogamous. So a man's needs fall on one woman. And usually the female starts to lose her passion for her husband. Of course kids and life are a factor. But the end result is the husband is neglected. Less touching less tongue kisses less sitting on his lap and less enjoying each other.
The 7 year itch....Wife's sex drive cools after the first year and the husband in love with her hopes for the best but eventually he wants to make love with a woman that is passionate and wants to make love to him. But it is a cyclic disaster because if he leaves his wife for his mistress she it is likely that she will go through the same cycle. Even if a husband communicates his needs and explains if she can't enjoy making love to him, he will divorce her, she will usually choose divorce.
It is called alienation of affection in court. And it is about affection as a whole. Sure it is about sex but it also about love and affection and wanting to touch and talk to each other. It is about passionate kisses and touching and spooning and cuddles and communication. The word intercourse means communication.
There is a norm here....God put it in a man's mind to want to look at beauty and to see and touch and kiss twin firm roundnesses. Male sex drives are primitive and repetitive....almost like toys. The Bible says, let her breasts always satisfy you. But the wife gets tired of having her toys played with. Female sex drives are far more complicated. Young girl's sex drives involve environment.... they are attracted to cars and social standing....and then of course looks.
The female sex drive generate energy for primping, when the sex drive dwindles the energy for that goes away. Now to answer the question...can men and women love more than one person? It happens all the time....the wife loves the husband as a family unit and a provider almost platonic. And she loves her lover because she enjoys making love to him. And men may not want to break up the family unit in order to have affection and maybe is in love with his mistress.
Of course there are other scenarios....men and women fall out of love.
Bottom line.....not everybody has it in them to be in love....To want that other person for the rest of their lives and that person is more important to them than even themselves. And both persons feel the same way. One way love does not work. Crazy stuff "in love" is, because nothing is more important than the person you love. And it is the other person that makes you whole.....soulmate. But for most of us that is what we want. But how can we tell if it real?
We can't know the future....and like I have tried to explain, marriages that end a lot of times are not either one's fault....But even if you get a divorce and children are involved it is better to have a "friendly" divorce and remain as an extended family. Divorce lawyers are about hate and you pay them to destroy your life and lives of your children. And to the men I say, you loved her enough to marry her and she is the mother of your children, always treat her with respect and love, married or not.
KSav
Well-known Member
- Location
- Northern Plains
I don't even know where to start with the many outlandish claims you make in your post, so I won't even try except to say I think this one is particularly offensive:
And usually the female starts to lose her passion for her husband. Of course kids and life are a factor. But the end result is the husband is neglected. Less touching less tongue kisses less sitting on his lap and less enjoying each other.
And usually the female starts to lose her passion for her husband. Of course kids and life are a factor. But the end result is the husband is neglected. Less touching less tongue kisses less sitting on his lap and less enjoying each other.
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Grailhunter57
New Member
- Location
- Farmington, Mo
Well the truth hurts. You might consider questioning me on anything biblical because I have hundreds of essays to give scripture to what I "claim." College educated Theologian in 5 countries.
Well you can take your own observation or survey of married couples. How many people do you know that are over 50 and have been divorce. Each divorce is a failed marriage. Right now about 75% of marriages fail....or are unhappy in their marriage.
bobcat
Well-known Member
- Location
- Northern Calif
I think the confusion comes in when the term love is used, but it has more than one meaning. In some cases, it is little more than a deep emotion or affection. In other instances, it is much more, and the two often get mixed together.
When love involves commitment, loyalty, respect, protection, and caring, I don't see how it's possible to share that with more than one woman or man without sacrificing something. Without trust, there is no emotional safety.
I think the misunderstanding happens when people mistake intensity of emotion with exclusivity. In my view, devotion should mean something. When you have that, it doesn't entitle you to have another.
When love involves commitment, loyalty, respect, protection, and caring, I don't see how it's possible to share that with more than one woman or man without sacrificing something. Without trust, there is no emotional safety.
I think the misunderstanding happens when people mistake intensity of emotion with exclusivity. In my view, devotion should mean something. When you have that, it doesn't entitle you to have another.
JustDave
Well-known Member
You can get any answer you want from the Bible, along with a good dose of moral instructions ranging from joyful to abhorrent. But I am interested in whether a man can love two women at one time, because I don't know if it is possible. I surmise that it is, but I'm not sure why, how, and how people deal with it.
Grailhunter57
New Member
- Location
- Farmington, Mo
I am not talking bad about marriage. Marriage is the foundation of society and religion. And in love is the goal and those that find it are fortunate.
No where in the Bible does it say that a wedding ceremony is required to be married. That is a fact.
In the 17th century the Protestants made church weddings a requirement to be married and shortly after that the Catholic Church followed suit. Making it a requirement was a good decision. A lot of history there.
Most wedding ceremonies have Pagan aspects and there is a good reason for that. Wedding ceremonies go back millenniums but they are Pagan. When the Apostle Paul converted the Pagan/Gentiles into Christianity they brought wedding ceremonies with them. So wedding ceremonies have been happening in Christianity but were voluntary until 17th century. The first documented Christian wedding occurred in the 8th century. But I am sure there were a lot weddings happening before that.
The Bible talks about the marriage in Cana, scholars speculate a lot about what was happening there. Either way the storyline pickup at the reception. We do not know who the couple was and why it was important to Miriam and Yeshua.