My husband~how would you handle it

debbie in seattle said:
He did it again last night! We were out with one of my daughters friends and we were discussing her summer vacation to my neck of the woods (Seattle) and she was going to visit Olympic Nat'l Forest. I said, "Oh, one of my sis in laws lives on the road going up there, what a view." Without a beat, my husband says,"No, she lives in a house on the side of the road going up there, not on the road." I ignored him.
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I couldn't let that one go buy without commenting.

"Are you sure it was a road and not a street?"
 
debbie in seattle said:
He did it again last night! We were out with one of my daughters friends and we were discussing her summer vacation to my neck of the woods (Seattle) and she was going to visit Olympic Nat'l Forest. I said, "Oh, one of my sis in laws lives on the road going up there, what a view." Without a beat, my husband says,"No, she lives in a house on the side of the road going up there, not on the road." I ignored him.
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Sounds like he's just playing with you here, to tick you off. He can't be serious on this one. :D Ignoring is best while you're with friends, nobody likes uncomfortable confrontations between partners.
 

Personally, I think they're just making themselves look bad. I have a sister that does that too and like you, I get annoyed!
 
SeaBreeze said:
Sounds like he's just playing with you here, to tick you off. He can't be serious on this one. :D Ignoring is best while you're with friends, nobody likes uncomfortable confrontations between partners.
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I'm thinking it may sound like more than just playing with her. He knows it's not funny since he does it at home and she yells at him about it. Perhaps it's jealousy. I think he wants to jeopardize her credibility in front of her friends...maybe to make himself look better or maybe because he's jealous of her having fun with her friends and maybe he doesn't have any friends or hasn't got friends where he's having that much fun with them. Debbie, I think ignoring him was a good move.
 
Lara said:
Steve, I think you may have missed Debbie's last line. Also, my comment was said rather tongue in cheek as an instant one-time fix done with humor. This one-time correction sure beats a lifetime resentment caused by her husband constantly embarrassing her in public for 40 years...and publicly placing her truthfulness in question in the eyes of her friends and acquaintances which sabotages her character.
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I guess punch him may be a reasonable option too.:hit:
 
What he said about the road makes it sound to me like he is purposely trying to needle you. Do you see signs of him being passive aggressive or being a bully? Are you the only person he does this to? Is he trying to make you look stupid or is he jealous of the attention you are getting from the listeners? I don't know what I'd do if I were you but I'd do something. I guess I'm not much help. Sorry.
 
I would warn him ahead of time that if he does that and humiliates me in front of everyone I will do ------( Whatever you want to). And then do it. He's not too old to learn respect for his wife! Just warn him if he starts you're going to wave him off and he's to be quiet til you finish. If not he's got it coming. Unless he's got dementia or something there's no excuse.
 
I would have liked to say- "Why do you think our friends are so stupid that they actually believed her house was on the road?"

"Do you really think they needed you to clarify"?

Then, let them kick his butt.
 
Ignore it...he isn't going to change. I have an aunt that is like that. When I introduce her to anyone and call her my aunt, she will quickly add, "She's my husband's niece." To me it seems like she want's to make sure people know we aren't related by blood.
 
"Everybody just seems so nice about this !

If I'd been humiliated regularly by my husband I would tell him the next time it happend I would be walking out and not socialising with him again until he stopped, and make sure I did, then I'd start making my own arrangements to meet friends and family without him, until he had a bit more respect"
This was Wren's answer in part and I very much agree with her.
 
Debbie, Learn to let it go. He's not going to change after 40+ years. Perhaps you could draw attention to his annoying habit each time he pulls his "I know it all attitude" by thanking him for being so precise or knowledgeable (whatever the case may be) and be sure to put a smile on your face. Make fun with it and I think you'll feel better and less stressed.
 
Sassy cakes, it has been my husband's chore to load the dishwasher since I got tired of the criticism and he likes doing it. It is actually nice - I cook, he cleans up. And he does his own laundryšŸ˜ŠWe don't have the correction problem- yet anyway.
 
Sassycakes said:
My husband and I are married 50yrs now and a lot has changed over the years. Years ago he never corrected me or said I was wrong about anything I said. Then retirement came and a new man showed up. Since he has been retired He has explained many things I don't do right. For instance I don't load the dishwasher the right way,and I also don't wash the clothes right. Oh and I also found out that I talk too much and even repeat myself at times. I laugh it off because if I didn't I would have to hit him over the head with the frying pan. I really think since retiring he feels useless and old. When we are with our children and grandchildren we all laugh when he picks on me. I just think it's a part of a long Marriage.
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IMHO, your now retired hubby needs something worthwhile to focus on. He should be occupied enough that he has no time to worry about how the dishwasher is loaded or how to wash the clothes. (By, the way, Consumer Reports has a lot of good articles on doing both to be energy efficient. Did you know you should not pre rinse your dishes as it messes up how modern dish washers work?)

Back to hubby. He needs to get a life.
 
I had one of those husbands and got rid of him. No, not with a gun or poison, with a piece of paper. Of course, there were other and much more serious problems as well but that trait was a constant irritation for 20+ years. Faulty zipper was last straw. Darn thing just wouldn't stay up.
 

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