What would you do?

debbie in seattle

debbie in seattle

Senior Member
Location
Seattle
We went to see my husbands Oncologist the other day. While my husband was talking (he tends to drone on and on), the doc looked at me and rolled her eyes!! I didn’t react when she did this but I’m burning mad.
What would you do? Furthermore, he was diagnosed in August with Mesothelioma and we were told at this last visit the tissue sample was necrotic (dead) and though 4 pathologists say they ‘think’ it’s Meso but need a new biopsy done! Why did this doc tell us this diagnosis when it wasn’t confirmed? What ticks me off is that she should of been honest with us from the get go. Today we’re off to see an new surgeon to talk and schedule another surgery to get a second sample.
 

I would stay calm and start looking for another doctor.

IMO the doctor should focus on the things that are important to the patient, even if things drift a little during the visit, after all it's his life not hers.
 
I'm sorry your husband (and you) are going through all this, you're right to go to another surgeon to get everything taken care of properly. You're there to support your husband during this trying time, how dare she roll her eyes when he speaks, not only rude, but very unprofessional. If it were me, I would report her to her superiors to make sure she changes her attitude or changes her job. :rolleyes:
 
I'm sorry the experience with the doctor upset you. I think another opinion is worth getting. Best wishes to you and him.
 
debbie in seattle said:
We went to see my husbands Oncologist the other day. While my husband was talking (he tends to drone on and on), the doc looked at me and rolled her eyes!! I didn’t react when she did this but I’m burning mad.
What would you do? Furthermore, he was diagnosed in August with Mesothelioma and we were told at this last visit the tissue sample was necrotic (dead) and though 4 pathologists say they ‘think’ it’s Meso but need a new biopsy done! Why did this doc tell us this diagnosis when it wasn’t confirmed? What ticks me off is that she should of been honest with us from the get go. Today we’re off to see an new surgeon to talk and schedule another surgery to get a second sample.
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How horrible for you! Very slipshod and rude of the oncologist. Definitely a new doctor is required, I think. Best of luck with the new surgeon and ensuing surgery.
 
The eye-roll would tick me off, too. Surely there's another oncologist in the office or group. I would request one of the others. It's ok they're doing another biopsy, but do not be shy about asking them to freaking speed it up! August? You might want to squeak just a little louder. Not enough to make them feel you're a chronic complainer (that can backfire), but if they know you are upset, worried, unhappy, and scared, they may be more caring and expedient, if they aren't just a lackadaisical bunch.

A good "people doctor" knows how to redirect conversations with patients who tend to drone on and on, to keep them focused on the important matters, without hurting their feelings or being downright insulting, like your husband's doctor.
 
I don’t think I could have controlled my temper if this happened to me, someone in her position rolling her eyes is disgusting. totally unprofessional and unacceptable

I hope you have the strength to take it further, then she may think twice about her attitude

My best wishes and good luck with your new surgeon and second sample
 
Aunt Bea said:
I would stay calm and start looking for another doctor.

IMO the doctor should focus on the things that are important to the patient, even if things drift a little during the visit, after all it's his life not hers.
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Strongly agree. First off, the rudeness is inexcusable; secondly, I think it's also inexcusable to wait so long to let you know the biopsy was iffy. Seems to me they should have told you that in the beginning, and ordered another biopsy right away.

I would have a very hard time trusting that doctor for treatment decisions, etc. in the future. I would find a new oncologist.
 
It sounds like the doctor really didn't care what your husband had to say,what she did was very unprofessional,should be reprimanded by her boss.
I agree with everybody else's response,go see&new doctor,who will take the time and really care about your husband.I wish you best of luck in the future Sue
 

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