I had a discussion about this forum with my son. Do you agree with his thinking?

Ruth n Jersey

Ruth n Jersey

Well-known Member
Location
Northern New Jersey
Over dinner last night I had a conversation with my son about this forum . He thought that if all the senior forum members were to meet in person it would be like being in a room full of perfect strangers and we don't really know the other members as well as we think we do. I disagreed with that. I think by now other members pretty much know quite a bit about me by my threads and posts and my interests. I don't pretend to be someone who I'm not and I don't think other members do either.I'm sure their are some personal subjects that people don't want to share but we do that with family members and friends as well. What do you think?
 

I have been to forum meets on quite a few occasions...and usually beforehand everyone has already seen photographs of each other, so at least everyone knows right from the get go who everyone is, and usually everyone starts talking at the same time, with comments like ''oh you're taller or shorter than I thought, or your photographs don't do you justice, or your voice is different to how I imagined it to be. It's funny because sometimes I've found that some people who have got on as friends very well on the forum find when they meet they don't always gel as well as they did online. Some people are exactly as they seem online and others present themselves differently online to how they are in real life, sometimes for the worse not always for the better.

All in all most for a meets I've been to have been for dinner or a day out for lunch and shopping usually at a coastal town where perhaps one of the members lives. These type of meets are usually women only, but There has been occasions where the forum meets are stretched over a weekend for a dinner dance and everyone stays at a hotel overnight. On those occasions rather than women only as with the lunch and shopping meets, many of the women Will bring their partners, and quite a few of the male members of the forum Will Bring there wives or Partners.
 
I agree with you Ruth, we know enough about each other where we wouldn't feel like complete strangers if we met. I think if you like someone online, you'll probably like them in person too.
 
I feel just the opposite of some of these posts. I don't think we know each other from reading the posts. That's why I think it would be fun to meet each other.
I'm sure there would be a lot of surprises, because we would meet someone and then say after hearing their voice and getting a feel for their personality: "You are not like your posts at all, but I'm glad to finally meet you in person."

Pick a city and give the date, place and time, and I'll try to be there. I love to take trips and meet "new" people. In honesty, I don't think anyone really knows me by reading my entries, just like they probably don't know you either. I am nothing at all like I sound when I write something (I am shy and sometimes intimidated by trying to express myself "on paper").

It would be nothing at all like a high school reunion. I knew all of the high school "celebrities" and always felt that I could not "measure up" and I live on the wrong side of town. Only a few of my friends from those days really know me, because I was so shy, and sadly the ones who knew me are gone now. At reunions I feel like a stranger.
 
I have been pretty open and honest with my postings and what I have been willing to reveal about my self. I think many members could know me, but I would have to make a guess at many.
 
My personality is pretty much the same online as in person.

Falcon can say if if he thinks I'm the same...if he sees this. He's known me a long time. I might be a little more serious in person then on a forum though.
 
exwisehe said:
I feel just the opposite of some of these posts. I don't think we know each other from reading the posts. That's why I think it would be fun to meet each other.
I'm sure there would be a lot of surprises, because we would meet someone and then say after hearing their voice and getting a feel for their personality: "You are not like your posts at all, but I'm glad to finally meet you in person."

Pick a city and give the date, place and time, and I'll try to be there. I love to take trips and meet "new" people. In honesty, I don't think anyone really knows me by reading my entries, just like they probably don't know you either. I am nothing at all like I sound when I write something (I am shy and sometimes intimidated by trying to express myself "on paper").

It would be nothing at all like a high school reunion. I knew all of the high school "celebrities" and always felt that I could not "measure up" and I live on the wrong side of town. Only a few of my friends from those days really know me, because I was so shy, and sadly the ones who knew me are gone now. At reunions I feel like a stranger.
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I'm with you on this. When you write it's different than when you speak. A person might come across as abrupt, when in reality he is a soft spoken person. There's an inflection in voicing words as compared to writing them.
 
CeeCee said:
My personality is pretty much the same online as in person.

Falcon can say if if he thinks I'm the same...if he sees this. He's known me a long time. I might be a little more serious in person then on a forum though.
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Yes, CeeCee, I don't think you've changed too much since I last saw you in person.

Still the pretty face and figure. So, Here are two forum members who have actually been with one another.

I'll betcha there aren't many others.
 
Falcon said:
Yes, CeeCee, I don't think you've changed too much since I last saw you in person.

Still the pretty face and figure. So, Here are two forum members who have actually been with one another.

I'll betcha there aren't many others.
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Thanks but would you say my personality is the same online as off? You are the same in my opinion....very good sense of humor and that's evident on the forum also.
 
I always wondered if there were such a thing as forum meets. I would have to be around a while to feel comfortable but once I did I agree that it would likely be sort of a class reunion.
In the old days there were pen pals and lots of them would meet at some point
 
hollydolly said:
I have been to forum meets on quite a few occasions...and usually beforehand everyone has already seen photographs of each other, so at least everyone knows right from the get go who everyone is, and usually everyone starts talking at the same time, with comments like ''oh you're taller or shorter than I thought, or your photographs don't do you justice, or your voice is different to how I imagined it to be. It's funny because sometimes I've found that some people who have got on as friends very well on the forum find when they meet they don't always gel as well as they did online. Some people are exactly as they seem online and others present themselves differently online to how they are in real life, sometimes for the worse not always for the better.

All in all most for a meets I've been to have been for dinner or a day out for lunch and shopping usually at a coastal town where perhaps one of the members lives. These type of meets are usually women only, but There has been occasions where the forum meets are stretched over a weekend for a dinner dance and everyone stays at a hotel overnight. On those occasions rather than women only as with the lunch and shopping meets, many of the women Will bring their partners, and quite a few of the male members of the forum Will Bring there wives or Partners.
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What you describe is exactly what I imagine a forum meet-up would be like. :)
 
OP;
Over dinner last night I had a conversation with my son about this forum . He thought that if all the senior forum members were to meet in person it would be like being in a room full of perfect strangers and we don't really know the other members as well as we think we do. I disagreed with that. I think by now other members pretty much know quite a bit about me by my threads and posts and my interests. I don't pretend to be someone who I'm not and I don't think other members do either.I'm sure their are some personal subjects that people don't want to share but we do that with family members and friends as well. What do you think?
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Maybe your son feels that way about it because there are lots of "fakes" on young people's social sites.

I'm funnier in person. I get more serious on this forum than I do on this side of my computer screen.
 
I think it depends on how long you’ve been a member of a site, some have known each other for years maybe meeting on sites that no longer exist, this is the case on another site I know of where a group meet regularly for lunch,

I get a general idea of other site members by which topics they respond to, if they share your sense of humour for instance, some are happy to share personal details and photographs others are more private
 
I am a fairly private person. My closest friends don't even know much about me. I was raised to keep my life personal from my Dad. He was a career military (U.S. Army) man and always thought it best to keep one's business to one's self. It's OK to share opinions and the like, but not personal matters such as financial information and family histories that may be misinterpreted. My associates at work always thought of me as intimidating because I would never speak about my family or share pictures with them. I was told this at one of my personnel evaluations. The person giving me my evaluation many years ago told me that I should open up more because it gives others a sense of trust. I wasn't sure why I needed to do that to be considered more trustful. I saw a lot of things go on by my fellow employees and my employee that shouldn't have, and was also told a lot of things about other employees, which I considered to be gossip, but never ratted anyone out. Just like Jerry Seinfeld, I put it away in the vault.
 

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