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Patnono

Member
Location
Whittier,Ca
Why do our adult kids think they can school us on things they know NOTHING about??? Today my youngest daughter told me that she's moving out because she can't take living here anymore. She's upset that my older daughter isn't as neat as she would like. She has a learning disability and has OCD. So she does things differently, she would like me to just kick her out??? She only works PT. Besides pretty much anything can set my youngest one off. She's tried telling me how to parent and that it's easy for senior citizens to get a job??? She is neither a parent or a senior citizen..the stress she gives me is not good for me. I'm relieved that she's leaving. Thanks to any one who reads this.
 

Sorry to hear about your youngest daughter Pat, I agree, your life will be less stressful without the two of them at home, I’d let her go with your blessing and a smile, just because she’s leaving home dosn’t mean you have to fall out, you maybe just need some space, she has a lot to learn...

Good luck, hope you are soon feeling better about things and life becomes a bit easier, take care x
 
Yea, she needs to go, I have to keep my stress levels low, a year ago I was diagnosed with diabetes, I also have anxiety and depression. So her behaving like this has caused me to feel I'll. She knows about these things and doesn't seem to care? She's pretty much has made life for me difficult since she was 10, running away, getting in fights when she was in school. She has her accomplishments a bachelor degree, but no excuse for her treatment of me. I've always suppoted of her, seems theres no appreciation. Makes me feel like what did I do wrong as a parent? So this will be the best thing for us.
 

Sometimes in spite of our very best efforts, our children just don't end up doing well in life. One of my five children ended up being a drug addict. We all struggled with that for many years. He's in recovery now, 4+ years, and is doing very well. I questioned everything I did as a parent to cause him to end up hooked on drugs. I had to remind myself that his 4 siblings, all who were raised the same way, didn't end up dysfunctional like him. It's his nature, that's all, having nothing to do with anything I did or failed to do.

I hope you find peace when your daughter leaves. Perhaps it will end up improving your relationship without the constant stress and anxiety that's created by her living at home.
 
Thank you for writing, when she came home today you feel the tension, we still haven't spoken. I know it'll get better. Shes moved out before and of course came back, this time there's NO coming back. I'm not guaranteed tomorrow, so she'll have to figure it out anyway. Living apart will be for the Best
 
Patnono said:
Why do our adult kids think they can school us on things they know NOTHING about??? Today my youngest daughter told me that she's moving out because she can't take living here anymore. She's upset that my older daughter isn't as neat as she would like. She has a learning disability and has OCD. So she does things differently, she would like me to just kick her out??? She only works PT. Besides pretty much anything can set my youngest one off. She's tried telling me how to parent and that it's easy for senior citizens to get a job??? She is neither a parent or a senior citizen..the stress she gives me is not good for me. I'm relieved that she's leaving. Thanks to any one who reads this.
Click to expand...
Ages!?
 
It takes some adult children a long time to "grow up" .. unfortunately, some never do.
I wish you well, Patnono. Now is the time for you to think of, and take care of, Numero
Uno.
 
Thank you, I'm also hurt by her because my 4 old grandson and his mom lives with us she sometimes seem annoyed by him. When she comes home he's excited to see her. She'll go straight to her room and ignore him. I understand that she doesn't want to live here anymore, but she won't even go anywhere we take my grandson to bond with him. He's her only nephew, it's Not his fault what's going on, but feel she kinda punishing him for what's going on.
 
This daughter needs to go & get on with her life. Let her make her own mistakes. That is about the only way she will ever learn.
 
think adult kids sometimes forget that parents need their time now' and space - maybe being more firm without arguing cards on the table time - especially when u suffer with anxiety which I do know isnt good....I missed my sons when they left a lot' we all got on well but have to say it was a blessing for me ' Quiter home'
less washing cleaning etc...
 
I agree, funny she had to postpone moving out because a bill came up. She can't do that when she moves out. She'll see what the real world is like? Shes not home weekends, it's peaceful. Life goes on ��
 
Supporting herself is what she needs to wake her up to reality. It will take little time for her
to realize how much she took for granted.

The first thing I did when I moved halfway across the country after high school, was to
write a thank-you letter to my parents for working hard all their lives to support me and
my siblings. It took strict budgeting to pay my share of rent, etc. with my older sister who
was making a higher wage than I was. Once she married, I lived on my own and really had
to budget.

Hopefully, your daughter will also have an epiphany.
 

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