2026 - my ups and downs

Jules said:
Oh no. Not knowing is harder than dealing with facts. Perhaps Goober has wandered to some warm spot and the folks thought he was a stray. I guess you have put up posters on utility poles. Local chat groups can keep a watch.
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No......I live in an extremely rural area. There are no utility poles, nor anyone to see any posters.

Goober is considered "semi faral".....he would not walk up to someone, or just let anyone pick him up. He could have been accidentally locked into someone's barn, but it's been four days and you'd think he'd have gotten out by now.

I know for a fact that he is not lost. If he were able to come home, he would. Again, the circumstances of his disappearance seems suspicious. šŸ˜•
 
Trila said:
No......I live in an extremely rural area. There are no utility poles, nor anyone to see any posters.

Goober is considered "semi faral".....he would not walk up to someone, or just let anyone pick him up. He could have been accidentally locked into someone's barn, but it's been four days and you'd think he'd have gotten out by now.

I know for a fact that he is not lost. If he were able to come home, he would. Again, the circumstances of his disappearance seems suspicious. šŸ˜•
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what do you suspect has happened to him...in your heart of hearts.. do you think he might have been run over...or what ?
 
hollydolly said:
what do you suspect has happened to him...in your heart of hearts.. do you think he might have been run over...or what ?
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No....he was smart enough to stay away from the road when a car came by.

Just after 3 PM he was playing in the yard, waiting for his dinner. At 4 PM I went to feed him and he was gone. He always hangs around the house at dinner time!! I have to think that his disappearance was directly influenced by a person or people.

None of the people who live around me are friendly, so I don't really know any of them. All I do know is that "something fishy" happened. I wish I knew what, but even knowing won't bring him back.
 
Itā€˜s too bad that thereā€™s no place to put a poster or an online chat group so you could use the sometimes magic word ā€œRewardā€. Hugs. Itā€™s a void feeling not knowing where you much loved pet is.
 
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It has been one week since Goober disappeared under suspicious circumstances. I'm still numb. I've tried to distract myself by going to the gym, my Mom's, and skating. While at home, I've attempted to read, but was not able to concentrate. So mostly, I've immersed myself in "my game".

Today, I will pack up his toys and his bed, etc. But I'm not giving up on him coming home. I will continue my vigil of looking out of the windows, waiting, waiting, waiting.....
 
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I, too, live rurally. The lifespan of cats here is not very long. Coyotes, bobcats, hawks, many predators are to blame. My neighbor had a kitty that was attacked by a turkey, ripped her up pretty badly but with surgery she survived. And didn't stray far from the house thereafter.

The worst part is not knowing. I am so sorry you are suffering with this.
 
MountainRa said:
I live in a rural area as well and have had the same experience as many of you. Itā€™s been a little more than a year since our big yellow tom disappeared. ( I blame a coyote). Youā€™re exactly right- the hardest part is not knowing.
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So sorry for the absence of your beautiful Goober. Hoping for a safe return.

For those in coyote areas I understand that now is the mating period for coyotes. We need to be extra vigilent.
 
We do have coyotes here, and we have lost cats to them before.

However, there are other factors involved that make doubt that a predator got him. But all of you are right....regardless of what I think/believe happened, not knowing for sure is the hardest part.

No closure. šŸ˜•

We put his house away, in the barn, today. That is something that hits me hard, having that empty spot right where I always look for him. With every day that goes by, I have less hope of him coming home.
 
I am so sorry. I know the feeling of having a cat go missing. It is heartbreaking to say the least. I would call and call and know my cat was not going to come running to me. But........I also had cats missing for a few weeks and then show up like nothing had happened. One tomcat was gone for months! I will be praying for Goober to return to you safe and unharmed. šŸ™
 
I thought of goober, and of you, during the night,
@Trila

I remember sweet things about both of you with each other, and I smile remembering when you gathered ideas from us, about a name.

I also understand how terrible it is, now, at this time, to not have any closure, and to have the heartache.
Letting you know, that we all do care.
 
Kaila said:
I thought of goober, and of you, during the night,
@Trila

I remember sweet things about both of you with each other, and I smile remembering when you gathered ideas from us, about a name.

I also understand how terrible it is, now, at this time, to not have any closure, and to have the heartache.
Letting you know, that we all do care.
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Thank you!
 
Today I got fed up with my other forum...AGAIN! I have made my last post there. This is hard for me because the owner of the forum is (was???) a friend. I guess I'll just have to wait to see how that plays out.

I've always said that the people here are so much nicer and caring. I'm glad that I found The SF and all of the wonderful friends that I have here! šŸ˜˜
 
1772545413585.gifYesterday, I started realizing how much stress my Mom is adding to my life. There is a lot going on with her, and I did a lot of thinking. Between all of my worry about her well-being, caring for her house & car, and her attitude and manipulation.....it's no wonder that I'm sick so much!

OK, well.....the problem has been identified:
I can't do it all, and regardless of how much I want to be there for her, it's affecting my mental and physical health.

Now, I just need a solution to the problem. šŸ˜„



I was going to go to the gym today, and run errands, and enjoy my day in town. My plans changed, and I'll be with my Mom most of the day. She needs help, so I'm there for her. I don't know how much longer I'll have her in my life, I just wish that the time we have wasn't so stressful on both of us. 1772545883748.gif
 
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I had a bit of a scare last week when I found a very unusual bite on my leg. Last October, a friend was bitten by a Brown Recluse spider, and she is still not fully recovered. She been through hell, with multiple surgeries, hospital stays, skin grafts, etc. Knowing all of this, I didn't want to take any chances when I saw my bite. I did get my bite checked out, and was told that it was NOT a Brown Recluse bite!

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In other health news, I've had Planters Fascitis since last Sept that was getting better. Key word here is "was"! The dang thing has taken a turn for the worst. I'm OK as long as I'm moving around, but once I take a break I can't get up. It is so painful that I can hardly stand up on it, and take a few (painful!!!) minutes before I can start walking around. I'm not sure why it got worse, but it really needs to stop! šŸ˜’


This has been a good week for tree cutting. There were 5 trees that were cut. They weren't very big in diameter (10 inches or less) but they were all around 40 feet tall. So, I've been out there, dragging branches and stacking logs every day. Next winter's Yule fire is completely set up. It will be nice and dry by the time we are ready to light it. It was a lot of work, and I've been exhausted every night....but I'm glad that it's done!
 
I need a cat.......

Yesterday, as I was walking down the driveway, I went around what I thought was a leaf. When I was about a foot away from it, it sat up and just looked at me. šŸ€ Dang mouse!! I thought it was going to wave and say "good morning"!!!!!! šŸ™„

I need a cat.......
 
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I've had a lot on my mind for the last few days. Well, this is going to be long, but I'll do my best to give you the shortest version that I can.



It turns out, that my Mom fell (again!) on Wednesday night. She said that her head hit the dresser, hard enough to pop the drawers open. She told me about it the next day, when I met her at the eye doctor's office for her check up. She said that she was fine, even though she was black and blue above and to the outside of her left eye. I worry about her falls, but she does wear an emergency button, so I feel better about that at least.

As it turns out, when she fell she put a substantial scratch on the surface of her left eye, and SHE DIDN'T KNOW IT!!!! The doctor said that it should have been very painful, and the fact that my Mom didn't feel it was a very bad sign. She put my Mom on a prescription ointment for 2 weeks, to help it heal.

My Mom has a follow-up appointment in 3 months. What she doesn't know, is that at that appointment, the doctor is expecting to tell my Mom that she is not to drive anymore.

This means I loss of independence for her, and it will make her very sad. She knows that she will eventually stop driving, but she was hoping to continue for one more year. I'm not going to say anything, I'll let the doctor give her the news. šŸ˜„

This will be hard on both of us. Her loss of independence means more responsibility for me. Right now, I'm really stressed out about this. Honestly, I'm not sure how much more I'm capable of doing.....I feel so overwhelmed at times!

But there is a good side.....
I have been trying to get medical intervention on her behalf, for several years. Her GP keeps telling me that as long as she is able to make her own decisions, there is nothing he can do. Seriously?!!!! šŸ™„ Next month she will be 94 years old!!!!

At least now, maybe things will start changing. I'm hoping that I will eventually be able to "legally" make decisions for her, and see to it that she is being cared for. It's a lot of responsibility, and it's scary right now. But when the time comes, I will be happy to be there for her! šŸ’—
 
These are really stressful times for you, Trila. TG, your mom is willing to wear a medic alert necklace. Iā€™m surprised it didnā€™t send an alarm when she fell, or maybe it only works when she activates it. My watch reacts whenever I fall and asks if I want help. Youā€™ll be working with her making a lot of decisions.
 
Jules said:
These are really stressful times for you, Trila. TG, your mom is willing to wear a medic alert necklace. Iā€™m surprised it didnā€™t send an alarm when she fell, or maybe it only works when she activates it. My watch reacts whenever I fall and asks if I want help. Youā€™ll be working with her making a lot of decisions.
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She has to activate her Alert Button.

She has drastically cut back on her driving, on her own. She is aware that she's having problems with her memory and has started to worry about getting lost.

Most of her driving is limited to coming to or from my house, or going to the Dollar General for milk and bread. Both are less than a 5 mile drive away. Other than that, she goes out with her friends, and they come to get her, so she doesn't drive.
 
I can relate to so many of the worries I had for my mother. She would forget where she was going and had a minor fender bender. She didnā€™t tell me these things, her neighbours finally did. I didnā€™t live close.

One of the other issues was her banking, thankfully we were joint holders. She would donate repeatedly to the same places and they kept contacting. If that happened now, I would be getting notifications immediately.

It was all the little things that built the stress. Hugs for you.
 
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