A humorous look at garage sales

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I have had people pay me with Zelle at garage sales. One person was out of town and texted me saying she would Zelle me the money for a picnic table and chairs if I would hold it until she got home as week later. She paid me and I put a sold sign on it. I put my phone number in the online ad for the sale. Some people bought more stuff than they planned on and taking Zelle made the difference.

One time a young couple were trying to figure out what they could buy for furniture with the money they had. They didn’t ask for a discount but I gave them one so they could buy what they needed and I threw in a piece of furniture for free. That felt so good as they were furnishing their first apartment.
 
I have a few more types to add to my list:

“The Insister” - ask for a specific item. When you say, “I don't have that”, they proceed to disbelieve and require you to produce it. Won't take “no” for an answer and act like you're holding out on them.

“The Vague Shopper” - asks in a very general term if you have something you perhaps didn't put out. No matter what you produce it's, “That isn't what I'm looking for.” Why aren't they more definite when first asking?
e.g.
Shopper: “Do you have any dinner plates?”
I raid the kitchen cabinets and bringing out an armful.
Shopper: “Well, they're nice, but I wanted ones with flowers on them.”
Another kitchen cupboard search and I bring out a few more.
Shopper: “No, not really what I wanted.”
Me: “Could you be specific, then?”
Shopper: “Don't you have any Spode?” (if you don't know what Spode is, Google it)

"The Late Comer" - shows up 5 minutes before closing time, then does a "Creeper" when you're anxious to close down for the day. The “Late Comers” are probably people that think you'll greatly reduce the prices because the sale is nearly over.

“The Blameless” - damage items and won't own up to it. Usually with a statement, “It was like that.” or “If you had it displayed properly, that wouldn't happen.”
 
Another one: "The Talker/Reminiscer". Wants to wax on endlessly about how his dad had that EXACT item, what he did with it, how much it cost back in 1950 and what it would cost today, yada, yada, yada, while four people are lined up to pay you. Mind you, he's not actually interested in buying the item.....he just wants to stroll leisurely down Memory Lane in your company.

And then there's the one that I mentioned a while back in another thread. I don't know what to call her but "Contrary Mary". My neighbor was having a sale and he had a couple of black boxes that had a dial on the front and wires coming out of the back. He had a tag, $1 for both.

A woman came up and asked about the boxes. He said he had absolutely no idea what they were and whether they worked or not. She huffed and said he shouldn't be charging for something that might not work. He said, "OK, they're yours for free, then."

She said, "I don't want broken junk!" and stomped back to her car.

We just looked at each other and sighed.
 
jujube said:
Another one: "The Talker/Reminiscer". Wants to wax on endlessly about how his dad had that EXACT item, what he did with it, how much it cost back in 1950 and what it would cost today, yada, yada, yada, while four people are lined up to pay you. Mind you, he's not actually interested in buying the item.....he just wants to stroll leisurely down Memory Lane in your company.
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Yes, I had that one on my list. ;)
 
Deb, I remember you previously posting this. I think I'm a good customer. I have done drive byes. This Saturday I was off, I usually work Saturday. I only noted one sign but bypassed it before I realized it was a turn here arrow. I decided not to turn around. I'm sure you really have put up with all these types.

I've said it before, I would not leave your sale empty handed.
 
debodun said:
One guy said I left a letter out of my sign. I asked what and he said there should be a B after the first R in GARAGE.
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Please tell me that's not true! What a piece of nasty. You have nice things.

Have you ever had a customer tell you that you have nice things or your prices are reasonable. I've told people "thanks for the good deals" when I've paid them. If someone doesn't like what they see, walk away and keep the mouth shut.

Also, I'd never wrap anything for anyone again. Just have paper available and hand it to them. That jerk was just being mean.
 
The people down the end of my street were putting out some very nice baking dishes and vases. I asked how much, and they said their mother was moving into a nursing home and they are clearing out the house. I felt sorry to think they didn't want any money for them, so I went to a cake shop nearby to buy some cakes in exchange for the dishes. They were thrilled.
 
I had an encounter with a Schwarzenegger this morning. On the way back from PT, I stopped at a garage sale and a woman was there asking the people having the sale if they had any furniture. She said she buys old furniture and fixes it up to re-sell. I took the opportunity to tell her I had a few items to sell and she agreed to follow me home.

She looked at my items and they were either "too much work" or not what she buys. We finally settled on two items - an odd chair that needs a seat and a wall mirror for $10. Then she said she didn't have any money and would come back tomorrow. Any bets on if she will? Makes me wonder why she's stopping at sales when she can't pay for anything.
 
debodun said:
Any bets on if she will? Makes me wonder why she's stopping at sales when she can't pay for anything.
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My bet is against her returning. Sounds like she changed her mind at the last minute and didn’t want to admit it.
 
Here's another of "The Vague Shopper":

Them: Do you have any Christmas stuff?
Me: Yes, boxes and boxes.
Them (looking excited): I'd like to see what you have.
Me (now wise to this game): Are you looking for anything particular?
Them: Ornaments.
Me (wanting even more specific info): What kind of ornaments?
Them: Older ones.
Me (still playing the cat & mouse game): I have some Shiny Brites.
Them: Not what I want. Anything older?
Me: How old?
Them (in the final reveal): From the 1800s and from Germany.
Me (thinking): Yeah, you're gonna find those at every garage sale.
 
Jules said:
My bet is against her returning. Sounds like she changed her mind at the last minute and didn’t want to admit it.
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It got to be noon and she didn't show, so I called the phone number she gave me. A man answered and said that it indeed was the correct number, but she was out and not expected back until 2 pm. I asked him to have her call me. She actually did and said she was tired from work and her daughter was visiting, so she'd have to make it tomorrow afternoon after she gets out of work, so it would be 3 to 3:30 pm. Let's see.
 
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Sliverfox said:
Did anyone ask for Eastlake furniture?
I have the loveseat & matching rocker,a brown marble top stand & some dinning room chairs that need the bottoms canned.
Evidently one of the ancestors furnished a house with EastLake furnishings.

Hindsight,,wish I had let all go when Dad auctioned off the furnishings.
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I had an Eastlake style wall mirror I brought from the other house. I started at $100 and no interest; then $50 and then $25. Not one nibble. Finally had to let it go for $20, but it was heavy, cumbersome and a pain to move in an out for every sale. The mirror was bad in it anyway. I think it was an antique dealer who bought it, he also bought a bronze Art Deco style lamp base. Unfortunately, Victoran and heavy brown furniture in not popular right now and if anyone buys it, they chalk paint over that beautiful wood.

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