BlunderWoman
Senior Member
Self pity:
I have known some who live right on top of the self pity pool. One of my biggest fears in life is becoming full of self pity or a bitter person. I will tell you a funny story. I met this young woman at work. She was unmarried. I was married with 5 small kids. Back then we didn't have much. I had a very old dull yellow car with big gray splotches all over it. The air didn't work & it was a real funny looking car, but it ran. She came over one day . She pulled up in a brand new truck. She came in and sat down and began to cry because her parents had given her the new truck outside. I was completely at a loss. I said " And your parents giving you a brand new truck makes you sad because....??" Then she said " They gave my sister a Mercedes! Look at that piece of crap they gave me!" Part of me really wanted to laugh because it was like she had not even noticed the wreck parked in my driveway that I drove. She was really crying about it. I was trying to understand. I thought maybe it was favoritism and not actually the truck she was blubbering over. I looked back over my life & I must say I was thinking " Wow what a wimpy girl." Then I realized she had been brought up in a wealthy home and so on & maybe this was a biggy for her. I had never been given a car in my life. It would be many many years until I had a nicer car. I still can't imagine crying over a stupid car especially if it was brand new.
Bitter and venomous:
There was a woman in my divorce support group that was telling pretty much the truth when she first joined. She told how she had had a wonderful husband but that she had shoved him aside for years. She had not let him have sex with her for 5 years. Then he left her and wanted a divorce. Suddenly she cared and wanted him back. She said " I even told him he could have sex." It was too little too late he just wanted out. ...The divorce began.Then her ex found a new love. She began to tell another story of how her ex is with some trashy woman and how he's trashy after all she did for him. I completely couldn't hold it in I said " OMG the guy should have a halo over his head! You made your own husband do without sex for FIVE years for no good reason! FIVE YEARS! He didn't even cheat on you he just finally left after being love starved! I can't even imagine how much he must have loved you to do that! You told us that entire story & now he has finally found someone to return his love after many years & you
resent his happiness so much you are now lying about him!" She said " You're a liar. I never said that." ....so now she makes up her own 'truth'.
