After all these years, what are your thoughts on the concept of marriage?

I was targeted and used for money twice. Almost got married to a 3rd one that didn't want to use me for money, just sex. Would have been ok, but she loved someone else. It all worked out in the end, we split and she married him.
 
I am not good at choosing husbands. I've been married twice, and am separated from my husband.

I will not get married again, should I outlive my husband. Even if I chose wisely, I'm pretty sure I would always be waiting for the other shoe to drop. I don't think I could get used to someone seeing me as a person instead of in a role -- wife, mother, problem solver, etc.

I wasn't always a good wife either -- I don't mean for years on end, just there were times when I wasn't. Like the time I threw a can of soup at my husband. It didn't hit him because nothing I've ever thrown has landed on the target. But still, one should have better self control than throwing a can. Mostly I've thrown baseballs and snowballs (but not because I was mad)... never wanted to throw anything breakable because then I would have to clean it up.
 

Funny thing happened yesterday. Hubby is in a nursing home now and is being cared for by some very lovely young women. One of them who was new to the job came into the room with the specific intention of asking me how we had managed to stay married for 60 years.

Usually I give the facetious reply. "Try not to kill each other", but I sensed that she was serious, so I began to explain how important communication is to a relationship. I told her that it is very important to express your feelings honestly to your partner without placing the blame on him.

She took this in and nodded. Then I told her that while describing your feelings you must hold the hand of your loved one.

Her face lit up as if I had shone a torch at her and she said, "That's what I don't do. I cross my arms and shut him out."

I'm thinking that her partner might be in for a surprise the next time they have a row.
 
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