Coronavirus, nothing to joke about...but I gotta be me.

Going to ask my Mom if that offer to slap me into next year is still on the table.

Of all the things I learned in grade school, how to avoid cooties was the last one I expected to use!

So can we expect car insurance to go down since nobody can go anywhere? Just wondering... Jake ,from State Farm...

People keep asking “is coronavirus really that serious?” Listen up! Casinos and churches are closed. When heaven and hell agree on the same thing, it’s probably pretty serious!

Now that teachers finally have a chance to use the restroom, there’s no toilet paper.

Shout out to all the parents who never taught their kids respect and now they’re stuck at home with the little shits!!!

The longer this goes on the harder it will be to return to a society where pants and bras are required.

Cops these days will be like…come out with your hands washed!

Day 31 of quarantine…ate all the snacks and food…clothes no longer fit… but I’m still wearing gloves and mask for my protection.

I’m as bored as an Amish electrician!
 

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