Cremation remains - keep them whole or divvy them up ?

Toomuchstuff

Toomuchstuff

Member
Location
Wisconsin
I was reading an article where some family members are suing each other for who gets the remains of a lost loved one. In my simple logic, I thought "why not divvy them up ?" That was suggested later on in the article and the family was freaking out ,saying "he came into this world whole and that's the way he should go out". It made me think. Personally , I don't see the harm in dividing them up. Heck - if you want a scoop of me, take it ! I plan to be scattered anyway ! What's your opinion of splitting up ashes ?
 

I don't understand why a normal well adjusted person would want them.

My plan is to have my cremains buried in the family plot.

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To the person in the urn I'm pretty sure that it makes no difference whatsoever if his or her ashes are divided or not but if everyone is intent on getting a few sprinkles of Uncle Bob I have a solution.

Gather up a few old mustard jars and then just clean out the fireplace and give each person a jar of what they think is good ol' Uncle Bob......problem solved. :)

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When my next door neighbour died , suddenly at 58 , her 4 kids were fighting over her ashes ...so the eldest son took them out one night and tipped them under a tree in a public picnic ground .
I don’t give two hoots what they do with mine , as long I don’t end up in the rubbish bin
 
Our sons ashes are divided among who wants them. One of his sons plans to take some to Hawaii and the other son didn’t want any. His brother keeps some of his ashes in his car as we are a car trip kind of family. He plans to leave some at the Grand Canyon where they planned to go. I always carry some in my purse so he can be at family weddings or whatever. Some I buried with a lemon tree his friend gave us. My moms ashes were put over Silver Creek Falls in Oregon. My brother followed his wife’s wishes and scattered her on the Las Vegas strip which was illegal. She and I spent many happy hours there.
 
My husband wants his ashes dumped in a river next to the home he grew up in out in the country (the rest of his siblings have done this or will do this). I have an issue with this! Perhaps I would like to keep some of my husband close by. I was never asked, was never consulted.
 
debbie in seattle said:
My husband wants his ashes dumped in a river next to the home he grew up in out in the country (the rest of his siblings have done this or will do this). I have an issue with this! Perhaps I would like to keep some of my husband close by. I was never asked, was never consulted.
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If that is important to you then I would get one of these pendants now and discretely ask the undertaker to fill it for you when the time comes.

http://www.perfectmemorials.com/urn-necklaces-c-1282.html

Good luck!
 
Same as Aunt Bea. Our spots in the family plot were planned years ago. We'll "reside" there with my great -grand parents on down and we happen to be the last two remaining to be buried on that plot. The cemetery is right across from the high school where I pick up our grand-daughter. Occasionally, when I'm early, I visit the plot and spend a moment or two enjoying pleasant memories of my family.
 
Toomuchstuff said:
I was reading an article where some family members are suing each other for who gets the remains of a lost loved one. In my simple logic, I thought "why not divvy them up ?" That was suggested later on in the article and the family was freaking out ,saying "he came into this world whole and that's the way he should go out". It made me think. Personally , I don't see the harm in dividing them up. Heck - if you want a scoop of me, take it ! I plan to be scattered anyway ! What's your opinion of splitting up ashes ?
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Splitting is a great ideal as long as not used to season food.
 
My cousin's husbands' final wish was to be cremated. Right now, she has his cremains in an urn. Her own final plans are to be cremated herself and have their ashes spread at one of their favorite spots.
 
My thoughts are along the same line as Butterfly's.

As far as I am concerned after my last breath, neither my corpse nor my ashes contain my essence.
My tissues, if still useful can be harvested for donation to someone who needs them.

If not, my remains will, if possible, be cremated and if my daughter has anything to say about it, will be placed in a niche at the crematorium. Excess ashes will just be scattered without fuss. I don't care where my ashes end up but I would rather not be in an urn. Scattered on the crematorium rose garden is fine, with or without a small plaque. I like the idea of returning to the soil.
 
Butterfly; I don't much care what happens to my ashes -- after all said:
Same way I feel but if I go first mama said that she's going to bring my ashes home to keep an eye on me and keep me out of trouble :)......with no heirs / kids there is no telling where our ashes will eventually end up when we're both gone.

In our wills we're leaving the house, any money that's left and all our stuff, split 50/50, between a local wildlife rehab facility and a 'no kill' dog & cat animal shelter......taking into consideration of where we're leaving everything they might end up using our ashes as kitty litter. :D
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Not a big issue

Mom is still in my brother’s garage, in a neat little package, up near some canning jars


Told my lady, ‘if I go before you, and you wanna put ‘em in a special place, dump ‘em into Rock Creek’

We’re both starting to turn things around in what’s left of our minds

Prolly end up in Rick’s crock

I’ve never had good taste, but who knows, with a little seasoning…
 
Whether they are ashes or not, they are human remains; you are going to run into laws about where you can and cannot spread them. It's like those " kind" mouse traps, which don't hurt them. Where do you get rid of them? You ARE spreading vermin on another person's property. So you're okay if others drop mice/rats off on your home?
 
In my state you can scatter cremains, on land, as long as you have the land owners permission.

Scattering cremains in fresh water is still prohibited by law.

I believe that the national parks routinely grant permission to scatter cremains.
 
We scattered my sister in laws ashes in Lake Michigan which is a big no no . Everyone in authority I asked about doing it .... told me it's illegal, but they'll
"look the other way" .
 
Let them fight, lol. I don't care after I'm gone. I am part of the organ donor program. If someone needs something. I do know my heart and brain will be wanted by a lot of people, just because they are like new and never been used.

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I think "divvying up" someone remains is creepy and ghoulish. They should all grow up and dispose of the remains in a respectful way. I don't want anyone toting around my remains. I want my remains scattered over the acreage I currently own. Preferably in my Iris bed.
 

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