Dark Moment:s Do You Have Them?

I suffer with depression and panic attacks and I have learnt to cope with dark times in my own inimitable fashion
I still would like to smash a few things now and again but I do restrain myself
I am however looking to purchase a punching bag....any suggestions?
Please don't say my dear huz because he is always right there to support me when I am in a funk
Yes he is quite probably too good for me 😘
 

Liberty

Well-known Member
Location
Texas
There is more than the virus from China in the air. When one thinks a thought, it releases into the ocean of thought in the atmosphere to be picked up by anyone with the same "wave length". There is so much sadness in Earth's atmosphere right now.
It's imparative we send strong, positive thought out to the world. The world needs this now more than ever!
I should add IMO.
Feel we are at a pivotal point in life right now. Choices we make as individuals and as states and nations really matter -its like the apex of the bell curve of energy swinging - far left and far right. And its not just about the virus.

Its like we had a whole whoop -ars can of karma opened up on us and we are now in "detox" to begin anew.
 

Aneeda72

Well-known Member
Yes dark moments. Deep dark moments involving me killing another human being. Of course I know this is wrong, but imagining the clock ticking for a certain deserving jerk can be captivating yet nonsensical at the same time. Let's talk types of attack modes and implements.:)
Let’s not. @Judycat

Deep dark thoughts of killing another human being are nothing to joke about, although we all have thoughts like this. I attribute these thoughts to Satan, the big D, the guy who is the flip side of G O D. I chase the thoughts away with a, I suppose mantra, Get Thee Behind Me Satan.

I am not joking. Besides, there are too many deserving jerks.

Have I had these dark thoughts, yes. Did I impulsively ever act on them, kind of. First marriage, I was very young, he was beating the crap out of me, as usual. But now I had a baby, a disabled baby. And I was tired of being hit. Just plain tired of it.

It was 1964. We had a room divider book case separating the living room from the dining room. I got away from him and ran behind the divider which was full of books, yeah, like that was safe-not. In those days they were not attached to the wall.

He on one side, me on the other. He said something, can’t remember what. He was a deserving jerk, plus. I was younger in those days, stronger, had a baby to protect. Yup. I remember wanting to kill him, wanting him dead. Missed him by that much.

He said “Do you know you could have killed me?”. Did I mention he was stupid as well? 🤦🏻‍♀️In retrospect, I realized, later, I could have gone to jail, no self defense for wives back then. What would have happened to my baby? Wives were chattel back then. He put the room divider against a wall after that.

So-Get thee behind me Satan.
 
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Pepper

Well-known Member
Location
NYC
I am sorry, it happens.

A dark moment? Venting is good for the soul and the mental health. Vent away. Here or in front of a mirror or in the shower. Or throw a self pity-party invite candy and ice cream, they love to attend. I should know, I am an expert at this 😆
Thank you Aneeda. I have a hard time talking about what bothers me. It usually gets me nowhere. I'm trying to learn to just let go........Just meditated chopracentermeditation.com/experience. Feel better.
 

Judycat

Senior Member
Location
Pennsylvania
Let’s not. @Judycat

Deep dark thoughts of killing another human being are nothing to joke about, although we all have thoughts like this. I attribute these thoughts to Satan, the big D, the guy who is the flip side of G O D. I chase the thoughts away with a, I suppose mantra, Get Thee Behind Me Satan.

I am not joking. Besides, there are too many deserving jerks.

Have I had these dark thoughts, yes. Did I impulsively ever act on them, kind of. First marriage, I was very young, he was beating the crap out of me, as usual. But now I had a baby, a disabled baby. And I was tired of being hit. Just plain tired of it.

It was 1964. We had a room divider book case separating the living room from the dining room. I got away from him and ran behind the divider which was full of books, yeah, like that was safe-not. In those days they were not attached to the wall.

He on one side, me on the other. He said something, can’t remember what. He was a deserving jerk, plus. I was younger in those days, stronger, had a baby to protect. Yup. I remember wanting to kill him, wanting him dead. Missed him by that much.

He said “Do you know you could have killed me?”. Did I mention he was stupid as well? 🤦🏻‍♀️In retrospect, I realized, later, I could have gone to jail, no self defense for wives back then. What would have happened to my baby? Wives were chattel back then. He put the room divider against a wall after that.

So-Get thee behind me Satan.
Too bad it didn't fall on him though.
 

AnnieA

Senior Member
Location
Down South
Really struggling lately. With news of short antibodies lifespan and reinfection (five confirmed cases locally who were previously sick in March and April), I've lost my optimism that natural or vaccine herd immunity is going to happen anytime soon. :cry:
 

Aneeda72

Well-known Member
Really struggling lately. With news of short antibodies lifespan and reinfection (five confirmed cases locally who were previously sick in March and April), I've lost my optimism that natural or vaccine herd immunity is going to happen anytime soon. :cry:
Well, herd immunity is never going to happen, so please put that thought aside. It just is not possible. I have done a 180 about the vaccine. I was not going to risk it, but now I am. I want to go see my daughter next year and my great granddaughter.

I have not seen my granddaughter and two great granddaughters, who live in town, in over a year. Not because of the virus, but because she is a rude, selfish human being, and always has been. Then the virus hit, and Bob’s your uncle, she finally has an excuse. 😂
 

AnnieA

Senior Member
Location
Down South
Well, herd immunity is never going to happen, so please put that thought aside. It just is not possible. I have done a 180 about the vaccine. I was not going to risk it, but now I am. I want to go see my daughter next year and my great granddaughter.

What's depressing me is that antibodies are lasting appx six months post infection and some people with mild or asymptomatic cases hardly produce antibodies at all. Since vaccines are much milder than actual infections, I don't anticipate vaccine triggered antibodies to protect for very long. If I were you, I'd wait until a month or so before you plan to see them to get the vaccine.
 

Aneeda72

Well-known Member
But @AnnieA what in particular are you struggling with? Just the general whole depressive situation we are all in or something more specific? I struggle with the fact that so many lives have been lost. It makes me so very sad. I just don't have the words to explain how sad it makes me.

But we must all carry on, no matter how tired we are of masks, and isolation and doom and gloom. Oh, and the boredom, some days I am so bored I could just sink into the floor which would, actually, be a change of pace and interesting.

Today my oldest son told me to stop making dad rearrange the furniture. 😂. Try and feel better. It will end-one way or another.
 

Aneeda72

Well-known Member
What's depressing me is that antibodies are lasting appx six months post infection and some people with mild or asymptomatic cases hardly produce antibodies at all. Since vaccines are much milder than actual infections, I don't anticipate vaccine triggered antibodies to protect for very long. If I were you, I'd wait until a month or so before you plan to see them to get the vaccine.
Oh, for sure, getting the vaccine first. Then, off to see them. Daughter has a dog she might want me to take. I am thinking about it, but he nips so not very sure. Last thing I need is a dog bite.
 

Autumn

Member
Location
Boston
This will be my first holiday season without my husband, and the dark moments feel like they're going to overwhelm me at times. He especially loved Christmas, he really went over the top in decorating, and this year I don't want to look at decorations and I resent the people who keep telling me I should decorate to "honor his memory". I'm being a horrible person. I resent my sister and brother-in-law for insisting on coming here for Thanksgiving. I feel like I want to fall asleep and wake up in mid-January. So yes, dark moments.
 

Aneeda72

Well-known Member
I've about lost hope that we're looking at an end to the pandemic anytime soon (even years maybe) regardless of infection rate or vaccines due to short-lived antibodies.
Well, hmm, it’s hard, for me, to reply because I can’t be what could be deemed political. Changes are coming. Will they be good changes? Will they be bad changes? Idk. But there will be changes and I am so bored with the stand still and wait situation. I have every confidence that I will get another stimulus check, that will make me very happy.

I think the virus will be with us for years, as well. Because there is no herd immunity, the virus will mutate, and stupid people will always exist, and catch it. We will be wearing a mask for a long time if not the rest of our lives because we are old.

There are lots of things we have not seen the end of: the flu, pneumonia, colds, yellow fever, HIV, Ebola, birth defects, diabetes, heart attacks, cancer the list goes on and on.But, we can deal better with the virus, as we deal better with the other medical issues, because we know more about the virus. Just like we know more about other issues. It is a learning curve.

The vaccines will help those that can be helped by it. We can continue to do what is necessary to protect ourselves. And we can go about our business in as intelligent fashion as possible. We will adjust to the new normal, once we accept that there is a new normal.

There is still hope enough to go around. Grab some of it and hold on tight. It will still be a bumpy ride.
 

Ruthanne

SF VIP
Location
Earth
This will be my first holiday season without my husband, and the dark moments feel like they're going to overwhelm me at times. He especially loved Christmas, he really went over the top in decorating, and this year I don't want to look at decorations and I resent the people who keep telling me I should decorate to "honor his memory". I'm being a horrible person. I resent my sister and brother-in-law for insisting on coming here for Thanksgiving. I feel like I want to fall asleep and wake up in mid-January. So yes, dark moments.
All I can say is there's nothing wrong with being yourself and doing what you need to do to help yourself in whichever way you choose. A long sleep can be a very good thing at times. I try to ignore what well-intentioned people tell me I have to do that I don't want or need to do.
 


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