Dating after 55

I became a widow when I was 53 and dated a few men. They were all nice but the chemistry just wasn't there.

Met most on dating sites. I was very careful though. One person I met through a friend, he ended up moving in with me for a few years but that didn't work out, so here I am at 66 alone but happy and not really looking anymore.
 

I have found that most normal, well adjusted, self sufficient, people that I meet have a pretty tight family and social network that is difficult to crack.

I'm pretty much resigned to the fact that I will be alone for the rest of my life but trust me there are worse things than being alone!!!
 
I have an ad on a dating site but haven't had any luck. Let's put it this way-there have been a lot of jerks who answered! I still try but don't really have high hopes any more.
 
I quit dating when I had my lady friend move in with me. What a doll ! When she was 17 she won the Miss Maryland

beauty contest and has retained her eye-candy looks. Not only is an excellent cook but helps with the house and garden work.

Her father owned oyster beds in the Chesapeake Bay area. She has many stories about that.

She also has brains. For several years she worked for Boeing Aircraft as a program planner for the B1b Bomber.
 
I haven't dated many women since moving here a few years ago. I don't go to any of the clubs or bars...I rarely drink alcohol and the nicer clubs are way downtown. So meeting women has been difficult. My daughter-in-law set me up on a couple of blind dates, but nothing long-term came of them. I tried the online dating thing, met two of them in person. Didn't see eye to eye with either of them on a few issues that really matter to me.

The lady I'm currently dating approached me at the hardware store a few weeks ago. Her opening line was wonderfully transparent; "Excuse me, are you married?" We're still in the getting to know each other stage. She's a very nice lady.
 
Where do you meet people?

 Out.

There are mo strangers out there, just friends you have not yet met.

I had a date with a lively widow last week and I'm looking forward to the next one.

I shall be 80 in a few weeks ( if she lets me live that long!).
 
I can't imagine dating at 58 years old. I met my current wife about 15 years ago. It was easy back then. You have to kiss some frogs to find your princess.
 
I have gone out on a few dates in the past year and have concluded that I am too set in my ways for anything serious for now. Perhaps that will change when I finally do retire and have more free time.
 
My wife died in 1989 after a great marriage 0f 32 years. I was 55 years old and she was 53. I sat down and had a visit with my daughter and asked her how she felt about me dating. Furnished with her support and encouragement I hit the bricks so to speak. I realized that most females would consider me as being a GOOD CATCH. I had a beautiful home, a great career, was trim and athletic. With out going into detail or specifics just let me say I took full advantage of my status for three years.
 
Lon said:
My wife died in 1989 after a great marriage 0f 32 years. I was 55 years old and she was 53. I sat down and had a visit with my daughter and asked her how she felt about me dating. Furnished with her support and encouragement I hit the bricks so to speak. I realized that most females would consider me as being a GOOD CATCH. I had a beautiful home, a great career, was trim and athletic. With out going into detail or specifics just let me say I took full advantage of my status for three years.
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To be honest, I avoided men like that...they tended to be too full of themselves. :)

I'm not talking about you, Lon...just in general.
 
CeeCee said:
To be honest, I avoided men like that... they tended to be too full of themselves. :)
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That's a big part of the difficulty I'm experiencing; what the women want is a man that's perfect for them. Neither to good nor to bad. Neither to well off nor to frugal. Neither to active nor sedate. Religious nor hedonistic. Partier nor teetotaler...
It either starts at, or culminates with; they don't want to compromise. Which, to me, means they don't really want to be in a relationship.
 
If I were still single, not sure I would not consider dating. Too set in my ways. I think if I become alone, I would not date again. Just develop a social network of friends.
 
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I've dated a little. Last time was a few months ago and interesting. We were set up by our financial planner...bless her heart. He was fit, attractive enough, and filthy rich (I'm not, but comfortable and happy), he talked non-stop about money, everything he said was connected in some way to money. He wore a big gold ring and drove my dream car (convertible Lexus).

His name is on a monument at Cape Canaveral as a founding member of the space program and was an engineer. I was impressed by his accomplishments but totally turned off by all of his money talk and and focus on himself....and his desire to die by assisted means in exactly 6 years. I was able to wiggle my way into his one-sided "conversation" long enough to mention that he was healthy and fit and had a lot to live for still but he stood very firm and I made no impact on his decision. The conversation quickly shifted back to him him him. We had nothing in common as far as I could tell.

He even told me that he meets with his buddies once a week at Costco for a hotdog...$1.50. Everything was punctuated with a price, even a hot dog. I know, some are saying I was an idiot not to hang in there for 6 years and walk away rich (my sister did), and don't think that it didn't cross my mind...but the thought was very fleeting..INSTANT even. It's just 100% against my moral fiber to use or manipulate someone for monetary gain.

I wouldn't want to give 6 years of my life to a stranger I had no interest in for anything. I know that if I dated him then maybe there was a chance I could have brought out the best in him over time but that inner voice was strongly saying...walk away. So I did. No regrets. 6 years of the remaining portion of my life is significant. I want it to be happy and with a good purpose. A simple life sounds good to me.
 
I'm comfortable on my widows benefits (with the help of my kids) and there is no way I'd want to date that guy. There's nothing in the world financially that I want or need that I'd put up with him for even one year let alone 6!
 
HipGnosis said:
That's a big part of the difficulty I'm experiencing; what the women want is a man that's perfect for them. Neither to good nor to bad. Neither to well off nor to frugal. Neither to active nor sedate. Religious nor hedonistic. Partier nor teetotaler...
It either starts at, or culminates with; they don't want to compromise. Which, to me, means they don't really want to be in a relationship.
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You don't know what you are talking about. We are not all the same as you seem to indicate.
 
Lara said:
I've dated a little. Last time was a few months ago and interesting. We were set up by our financial planner...bless her heart. He was fit, attractive enough, and filthy rich (I'm not, but comfortable and happy), he talked non-stop about money, everything he said was connected in some way to money. He wore a big gold ring and drove my dream car (convertible Lexus).

His name is on a monument at Cape Canaveral as a founding member of the space program and was an engineer. I was impressed by his accomplishments but totally turned off by all of his money talk and and focus on himself....and his desire to die by assisted means in exactly 6 years. I was able to wiggle my way into his one-sided "conversation" long enough to mention that he was healthy and fit and had a lot to live for still but he stood very firm and I made no impact on his decision. The conversation quickly shifted back to him him him. We had nothing in common as far as I could tell.

He even told me that he meets with his buddies once a week at Costco for a hotdog...$1.50. Everything was punctuated with a price, even a hot dog. I know, some are saying I was an idiot not to hang in there for 6 years and walk away rich (my sister did), and don't think that it didn't cross my mind...but the thought was very fleeting..INSTANT even. It's just 100% against my moral fiber to use or manipulate someone for monetary gain.

I wouldn't want to give 6 years of my life to a stranger I had no interest in for anything. I know that if I dated him then maybe there was a chance I could have brought out the best in him over time but that inner voice was strongly saying...walk away. So I did. No regrets. 6 years of the remaining portion of my life is significant. I want it to be happy and with a good purpose. A simple life sounds good to me.
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Did you really buy that load of bullshit he was feeding you?

I've seen dudes tell some pretty far out stories trying to get laid, but that one takes the cake.

"I've got a lot of dough baby and it can all be yours when I check out in six years"


:lofl:
 
It took a long time to meet Mr. Right, but in the meantime I went out with his cousins: Mr. Boring, Mr. Mean, Mr. Egotistic, Mr. Cheap, Mr. Destitute, Mr. One-foot-in-the-grave, Mr. I'll-never-trust-another-woman-again, Mr. I-can't-get-over-my-late-wife, and Mr. I'm-actually-still-married-but-my-wife-doesn't-understand-me.

My first date was almost my last date. The 10 minutes or so we were on a "date" ended up with me dumping a glass of iced tea in his lap. It wasn't an accident, either. I was just about ready to give up at that point and get a cat or something. As the old widow said, "Why would I want another husband? I have a chimney that smokes, a dog that snores and a cat that stays out all night."
 
jujube said:
It took a long time to meet Mr. Right, but in the meantime I went out with his cousins: Mr. Boring, Mr. Mean, Mr. Egotistic, Mr. Cheap, Mr. Destitute, Mr. One-foot-in-the-grave, Mr. I'll-never-trust-another-woman-again, Mr. I-can't-get-over-my-late-wife, and Mr. I'm-actually-still-married-but-my-wife-doesn't-understand-me.

My first date was almost my last date. The 10 minutes or so we were on a "date" ended up with me dumping a glass of iced tea in his lap. It wasn't an accident, either. I was just about ready to give up at that point and get a cat or something. As the old widow said, "Why would I want another husband? I have a chimney that smokes, a dog that snores and a cat that stays out all night."
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You crack me up, Jujube! :lofl:
 

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