Did you ever formally entertain, have dinner parties etc?

Ronni

Ronni

Well-known Member
Location
Nashville TN
In the early days of marriage, I tried my hand at formal entertaining. We didn’t have a silver service, or linen tablecloths, or even fine china, but still I did my best to lay a formal table and cook fancy dishes, and have actual dinner parties.

It didn’t take me long to realize I’m not a "formal entertaining" kind of person. I might still make fancy dishes (I like to cook) but it didn’t take long for that dining room to get pushed into service as something else, whether it was a play room, library, music room, or a school room (I homeschooled)

For many many years now my idea of entertaining is a gathering of folks comfortable enough to be chatting with me while I cook and they help, or take my demand to “get out of the kitchen you’re in my way!” goodnaturedly, take out the garbage upon request, and help gather up the plates and load the dishwasher. The only "formal" things I do is lay a tablecloth, and insist on appropriate manners. That's formal enough for me.

What about you?
 

Yes, few though. Because I was a good passable French cook, that's what the signature dishes usually were, or a good Cognac / mushroom coated beef wellington.

Yesterday, son and wife were here with their marketing consultant and I made lasagna...lol.
Shows you how casual I've become as time marched on.
 
I don’t know about “formal entertaining” but we have had plenty of big family holiday dinners. My wife used to get so stressed out about it so about 8 or 10 years ago I took over nearly all the cooking while she sets up everything else quite nicely and cleans and prepares the house for overnight company. Works well. Before I was a math teacher, I worked in food service. One summer, 3 kids out of high school and myself would feed up to 150 kids at a camp and I was in charge of it all so doing the big family meal, although still a lot of work, is something I can easily handle and I enjoy doing it.
 
Way back in my previous life, my first husband was in business and he had client dinners that I hosted. When I had dinner for our friends it was usually in summer and outside. For holidays, my family came to my house and I went all out for them and those were sit down dinners at the dining room table (didn't have a kitchen table!). None of them though were actually what I would call formal.
 
We would have dinner and fun semi formal parties. Casual dress. Friends and family. Mostly always fun. :)

Check this party that Salvador Dali put on...

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Ronni said:
What about you?
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Yeah, we gave it a whirl a couple times
Lotsa work
for little benefit
Now, all the fancy handed down dinner and silverware remain in the buffet
.....waiting to be handed down

Did have to go to some (comes with getting kicked upstairs via the corporate ladder)
Maybe due to me having a gift of gab
Seems folks enjoy humor
Maybe hosts like the thought of seeing folks laugh with food in their mouths
dinner party.jpg




Now?
Slap some thick steaks on the BBQ
Lay out my lady's tater salad and coleslaw
Stack the plates
Ice the beers
Invite rels and/or friends over

Anymore, the better event is when they leave

yay.jpg
 
Yes, once upon a time in a kingdom far, far away......I had formal dinners. No more. Now, everyone is on this diet or that diet, they're vegetarians, they're Vegans, they won't eat red meat, they won't eat anything with a face, no seafood, low salt, low sugar, no carbs, no gluten, lactose intolerant, peanut allergy, yada, yada, yada. It's almost impossible to set dinner before eight people and please everyone. I can't keep up with people's cans and cants.

Now, it's "c'mon over for pizza. There's pepperoni pizza and there's cheese pizza and there's veggie pizza. There's a salad; it's going to have carrots and tomatoes in it. If you don't like that, bring your own." OR...."let's meet at a restaurant."

The "fine china" has all been given away, the crystal goblets have been replaced with sippy cups, the linen tablecloths are stored away in the closet. I'm done being Martha Stewart.
 
jujube said:
Now, everyone is on this diet or that diet, they're vegetarians, they're Vegans, they won't eat red meat, they won't eat anything with a face, no seafood, low salt, low sugar, no carbs, no gluten, lactose intolerant, peanut allergy, yada, yada, yada. It's almost impossible to set dinner before eight people and please everyone. I can't keep up with people's cans and cants.
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I never had formal dinners. The wedding silverware and china were long ago handed down, basically unused.

I love having company, usually just a few friends at a time for informal dinners. It has become so tedious for the same reasons that @jujube mentions above. For a while I tried to accommodate the dietary requirements. Now I just say "I'm make this, and having this with it" If it's not ok, bring your own food and join us"

It still turns into a fun day or evening.
 
I've always loved to cook and I'm pretty good at it. Although these days I don't entertain much, my husband and I often entertained and had casual, intimate dinner parties with friends. On holidays and special occasions, we'd pull out all the stops, prepare a lavish meal, and use the good china, silverware, etc. When we spent New Year's Eve alone, I'd set a lovely table just for the two of us to enjoy. What's the point of having or keeping "the good stuff" if it never sees the light of day? There's something special about sitting down to dine at a beautifully set table.

Yes, it was a lot of work, but as Lewkat said, it was very satisfying. I'm happy to say that family and friends always enjoyed themselves and appreciated our efforts, whether the table setting was casual or more elaborate. The table might've been nicely set, but there was nothing "formal" about the gatherings. Trappings aside, while they may add ambiance to an occasion, it's the company that counts. 🙂 I'd rather eat off paper plates with people I like rather than dine on porcelain with people I don't enjoy.

Bella ✌️
 
Dinner is always at the table, whether everyday or for company. We only have the one dining space in this small house so the tablecloth and better napkins are what makes the difference. I get out the good dishes but the silverware stays tucked away, because it can’t go in the dishwasher. We‘ve both become reclusive.
 
hollydolly said:
Yes.. again in the early days of my first marriage, we'd have people to dinner.. but like you Ronni, I'm just not a formal type of person.. so I soon got tired of it..haven't had a formal dinner for years now..
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Ditto. We host more dinners, parties and gatherings than most. Informal buffets accommodate the disparate eating plans followed by family and friends: plant-based, keto, vegetarian, vegan, gluten free vegan, dairy-free, a few severe food allergies, omnivores and babies. I always serve salad ingredients along with a variety of fixings for themed meals like stuffed baked potatoes, assemble-your-own tacos/burritos, spring rolls, paninis, Mediterranean salad/hummus bowls, pasta with toppings, and so forth.

Also regular, vegetarian, gluten free, and vegan pizzas when we're having pizza parties. Nobody leaves hungry.

DH, his dad and brothers and a contractor worked together to add a dining room to our house in 1985. It's home to a 9' X 4' glass table and 10 (recently reupholstered) armed swivel chairs, plus we can sneak in a couple more seats when needed. Plenty of other tables and chairs for larger parties.

I break out the silver, my favorite china from Mom for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and do more formal meals, but those dinners are generally for 10-15 at most.
 
No, I've always been poor. And entertaining is not my thing.

I had a birthday party for my young daughter. At the time, I had a kitchen with a door on it, which is what I prefer. To me, a kitchen is for cooking, not socializing. I was very pissed off that all the parents gathered in the kitchen while I was cooking.

I once worked as a cook in a year-round children's camp. The whole place was being reorganized and renovated one spring, but I managed somehow. My boss chose that moment to host a wedding. The bride had certain demands that were really inconvenient. We were transporting the cooked food from one building to another in vehicles. I quit soon after.
 
I also had many formal and informal dinner parties when my husband was alive. We hosted them for several occasions - birthdays, name days, holidays, etc. Like others here, I would also spend a lot of time preparing for these events. I would usually start 3-4 days ahead, cleaning and baking, and would work off of a list, and I even timed it so that foods that had to be freshly baked were in the oven as the guests arrived. It was a lot of work, and a lot of food, but I think everyone enjoyed themselves. We would usually feast on the leftovers for several days afterward. But after my husband died, I didn't have large parties. Just small ones (2-4 people), and more recently (due to pandemic), take friends out to restaurants (to celebrate their birthdays, etc).
 

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