Do You Get Scared ?

Em in Ohio said:
Actually, I just Googled startle response in adults: https://www.lighterbrighteryou.life/latestnews/2017/6/21/magnesium
Despite the name of the website, the information is very interesting. I may get a magnesium supplement and give it a try. I jump when the phone rings and when people appear suddenly. Like you, I've tried training neighbors to make noise and approach facing me. Once upon a time, I had a coworker who would sneak up and poke me in the back rib cage, thinking it was funny to see me jump and squeal. It wasn't funny. The angry people were usually driving me - I would startle badly from the noise of something hitting the car or their phone ringing, jump and yelp - and be chastised severely. It is embarrassing.
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I startle easily as well. I didn’t read above, but I take 1200 magnesium a day and it hasn’t lessen my startle reflex.
 

Aneeda72 said:
I startle easily as well. I didn’t read above, but I take 1200 magnesium a day and it hasn’t lessen my startle reflex.
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Dang, disappointed to hear this. One thing that I read from another Google link that it might stem from encephalitis, which almost killed me long ago. /-; Well, I've lived with it for a long time now - it's not the end of the world, though I've jumped twice tonight because of the kitchen timer that I had set.
 
Keesha said:
My man used to think it was funny too. Not so much now . 😌 I fixed him. 😇
Magnesium helps relax my nerves but it doesn’t stop me from me from becoming overly startled or jumping or squeaking for that matter.
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Aneeda 72 also has this exaggerated startle response (according to her later post) and takes magnesium with no improvement. My hopes are dashed.
 

Em in Ohio said:
Aneeda 72 also has this exaggerated startle response (according to her later post) and takes magnesium with no improvement. My hopes are dashed.
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It appears that anyone who has had traumatic experiences over a prolonged period of time gets this. I don’t know if it’s part of ptsd or if it’s a separate thing. All I know if that it’s not something that can be cured in my personal life. I just deal with it the best when it happens and apologize to anyone I startle
 
It seems in my 60+ years I’ve found myself in several dangerous situations that activated fear. I wasn’t taught how to in protect myself or even instructed how to behave, so I have no idea how but my intuition Seemed to take over, reminded me attackers thrive on fear or panic. I don’t know how, but I used the adrenaline of my own fear to guide me instead of panic. I can only guess, not allowing my Potential attacker/attackers to see my fear may have been what saved me several times in life, either that I have a guardian angel.

Once a gang of street thugs stood in the middle of a industrial deserted street between me and my car. Initially I saw them and walked back into the building I had exited. Waited a while, when I came out the second time all 4 of them hasn’t moved still standing blocking my way. I knew they would know if I walked back in a second time it would be out of fear. I knew I couldn’t out run them, my gut told me I had to hide my fear, my only chance was to bluff them. The honestly thought I was about to die, however I faked my best confident walk Directly towards them, when I got within a few feet, I have no idea how I did it, but greeted them with the most genuine confident “HELLO GENTLEMEN” with as I could muster, making sure I barely walking within a foot of them. I didn’t dare look back and give away my fear. My whole body was shaking I could barely get the key into the lock of my car door. Still I never looked back until I pull out and was driving away, they all still stood in the street but had turned watching me drive away. That was many years ago and I still feel myself shake remembering it. I learned something from that, give them what they least expect and it just might save ya.

Now I’m much older, no longer attractive, gained weight and hair fully grey. Living alone, makes me an easy target. I’ve found pry marks on automated garage shop door. I’ve Come home to find my TV and phone box wide open several times. The Police told me they can’t do anything unless they physically catch someone in the act. The last several winters when it’s snowed I’ve found foot prints someone walking around my home up close to windows. I installed security lights and thought of camera’s but they are smarter then to be recognized Especially at night.

I’ll be honest these days my anger Seems to out weigh my fear. People know It takes Sherif 20-30 minutes to respond. Not Much good if I need help fast. So Several times my fear has exploded into anger. Ive hear noises outside.
I do what they least expect, SHOW NO FEAR, I’ve opened my door Walked out cursing and shouted “I don’t know who you are but I can hear you” Then with as much hostility I can muster say, “I suggest you get F’in get LOST because the Sheriff is already on there way but it won’t do ya any t good if I catch ya first, I’m PISSED OFF AND ARMED, MOVE ON
BEFORE MY RAGE GETS THE BEST OF YA! THEN I Spam the door as hard as I can. I’ve only had to do this a few times, So far The noises have stop, I realize I feel less scared, I can only guess my anger Really did overload my fear. Maybe deep down I feel I’ve lived my life, if it’s my time to go, so be it, but I refuse to be afraid, I can only guess my neighbors know this. 🤫🤪🤣
 
Keesha said:
It appears that anyone who has had traumatic experiences over a prolonged period of time gets this. I don’t know if it’s part of ptsd or if it’s a separate thing. All I know if that it’s not something that can be cured in my personal life. I just deal with it the best when it happens and apologize to anyone I startle
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It happens with anxiety too.
 
After 2 failed marriages thanks to my illustrious career I love being alone, well except when the 1958 movie "The Blob" comes on cable. When that horror show hit the small screen when I was a young'n I was gripped with nightmares especially when my older brother found a new way to torture me at night. Now I am alone and think maybe marriage would be a good idea, well maybe not so good since they scared me more the blob did when it was alimony check writing time.

the-blob-4.jpg



www.dailymotion.com/video/x5eT8gy

What really scared me was when the Blob took 2 direct hits from Dr. Hallans shotgun then absorbed poor ole doc. I always wondered if the people who were desert like strawberry jello to Bloby felt any pain. Now me? I'd hope to go into cardiac arrest if that thing showed up at my door.
 
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KingsX said:
?

Do any of you singles sometimes get scared... either for a good reason or for no specific reason at all ??

As I grow older, I've been disappointed to discover I'm not as "brave" as I was when I was younger.

The irony is... when I was younger I had so much more responsibility [I was a single working mother]
with less security than I have now. Maybe I just didn't have the spare time to worry. When I was young
and a crisis happened, I would think to myself... I must be brave for my child so he feels secure.

Now that it's only me... there's no more reason to even pretend to be brave.
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Yes I think that's one of the issues we get as we get older and specially widowed, I panic easier now, I don't have a husband to run to that would say "don't worry Ill take care of it". then after I bothered him with what was on my mind I would completely calm down. Hard to feel brave.
 
I'm scared up to this day when I remember The Exorcist movie with Linda Blair's head turning and the look in her eyes. I was just a kid then but up to now it never fails to give me the heebie jeebies just the mere mention of it.
 
KingsX said:
?

Do any of you singles sometimes get scared... either for a good reason or for no specific reason at all ??

As I grow older, I've been disappointed to discover I'm not as "brave" as I was when I was younger.

The irony is... when I was younger I had so much more responsibility [I was a single working mother]
with less security than I have now. Maybe I just didn't have the spare time to worry. When I was young
and a crisis happened, I would think to myself... I must be brave for my child so he feels secure.

Now that it's only me... there's no more reason to even pretend to be brave.
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I think that is only natural. Fear is a NATURAL RESPONSE TO THE UNKNOWN. We humans are social animals. We like to have other people around us. Herd instinct. A single Horse is as Jumpy as a long tailed Kitty Cat in a room full of rocking Chairs. Put in another Horse (and a goat for more fun) and they settle down. Same with Humans. Remember we are a Tribal creature and in prehistoric times we had a village around us to watch over us in hard times. NOT TODAY THOUGH.

There are three kinds of fear.
Physical fear: Fear for our physical being. Violence upon our bodies, positions, fire, earthquake, storms.
Emotional fear: Fear of being alone, Fear of feeling worthless, Fear of Depleting our financial resources.
Spiritual fear: Fear of what the immediate future holds, loss of Identity as a person. Fear of Sickness. Fear of control over our lives.

For Physical Fear we can take steps to secure out surroundings. Alarms, fire, intrusion, and emergency requirements. (simply safe systems is a good place to start, as you can start small and add to the system as time and finances allow). Get a first alert pendent that will allow you to request assistance at the touch of a button. Get a wireless control for lamps in rooms so If you suspect some one is in your house you can turn on interior and exterior lights at the touch of a button. Secure your Environment with shutters and steel bars over windows. Don't place iron bars over doors as that may keep first responders from getting to you in an emergency. The limits to your personal protection are in your bank book and intelligence. You might want to consider buying a good safe. There are floor safes out there that cost $600-$800 for storing your valuables and financial records. However (now this is a touchy subject for a great many people); think long and hard about purchasing a fire arm. Unless you have lived around fire arms most of your life my advice is to skip them. They are more of a danger to you than to any bad guys. Also you don't know what trouble is until you drop the hammer on some one!!! The police and the courts take the discharge of a fire arm very seriously (as well they should).

For Emotional fear: Get involved with LIFE. Join social groups where you can make new friends and be a new friend. Help out at libraries, schools, long term care facilities. Charitable fund raising activities. Join a Church group, book club, bird watching club, and a TRAVEL CLUB. I know of one TRAVEL Club that is an RV Club and bunch of senior citizens get together pool their resources and hit the road every summer for far away places. Those with out an RV can help pay the expenses of those who do have an RV.

Spiritual fear: A belief system where you know that your life mattered. A belief that you had a positive effect on some one at some time. A belief that you somehow made the world a better place for some one or ONE OF THE DIVINE CREATORS CREATURES. Just have a little faith you your self and YOU WILL BE ALRIGHT,
 
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Since no one knows who I am (really)... or where I live, I can say this honestly. People think I am brave, but...

Yeah... I get scared. I didn't used to. I didn't used to lock my doors. Even 15 years ago, I never locked my doors. Even though at my previous house in the city, I was robbed once, I still never locked my doors here....

I always had a dog that I though would alert me.... or protect my house. BTW... when my house was robbed. It was the night my dog had to spend the night at the vets, the next day... my house was robbed. Anyway. I always felt that my dogs were good watchdogs...

But society has changed. Now, drug users break into the home of older people to get their prescription pain killers.... there is less respect in the younger generations towards life and property. For goodness sakes, last year someone stole a "Give Thanks" sign from my yard. Who steals a give thanks sign after all???? An no dog barked .

I have always had a fence for my fur-babies. But a few years ago, I built a new six-foot privacy fence. There is no way to get in the back gate, you can only exit the gate. The only way into the house is through the front door. And, I have exchanged the 1 inch screws in my door plates with 2 1/2 in screws because that is what is recommend nowadays. I have motion sensor lights front and back. I bought a solar flashlight that would make a great weapon to hit someone. And, I have gun permit. That means I have a gun.

So now... I can say... I used to get scared sometimes, but I can say now that I am not scared any more. We, as seniors, have to be proactive in our own security. Fight or flight.... I'm a fight.
 
Not really afraid, but I am more aware of the dangers out there.
I guess I am lucky to have my Kelpie Miss Chicka. I kid you not that dog can here a possum fart on a wind howling night.
 


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