Do You Get Scared ?

Of course certain things frighten me. More because I am an innate worrier. A year and a half ago my 49 yr. old daughter in law passed away from and extremely rare and toxic form of cancer. She was gone in 4 months. I had introduced her to my son back in the middle of the 90s and they had an on again off again relationship for a few years and then just did not see one another for at least another 6 or 7. At any rate, they met by chance and got together again and finally married in 2008. 10 years later she was gone. They had no children due to the lateness of their marriage and careers.

So, now it is just my son and I and I worry constantly about him. He is coming along well. Belongs to a terrific bereavement group, but he has some very bad moments that frighten me, even though he reassures me he's OK. Now, with my having been so ill he is very concerned about me and I have to reassure him every day that I am fine.

This is becoming a vicious circle and it scares me sometime. Once I am out of isolation and he launches his boat I'll relax a bit more. Or will I? Taking it out into the bay or the ocean will give me pause for certain. Spiders and snakes scare the living daylights out of me. So do criminals, but I am more inclined to get angry over the things they pull.

I am always trying to find a way to stress less over these things. Generally, I am a pretty happy sort with a good sense of humor. Perhaps that's my saving grace.
 

Butterfly said:
I react the same way to spiders, particularly large, fuzzy ones. It's a visceral reaction I have no control over.
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I’m the same way about MICE @Butterfly I can’t stand them ,and I live in a cereal growing area ( in Aust ) where we get plagues of them from time to time

@Gaer allot of children / adults who live in the tropical part of Australia ( Queensland ) walk around ,go to school with no shoes on ...AND they have some of the biggest creepiest things in Australia.

like huge spiders / snakes / cain toads to name a few , If visiting Australia ever crossed your mind @Gary I’d cross Queensland off your list right now .:eek::eek:

I live in South Aust where we have one of the deadliest snakes in the world living ,the largest one I’ve seen was about 8 foot thank goodness we rarely see them
https://www.environment.sa.gov.au/topics/plants-and-animals/Living_with_wildlife/Snakes

We went on a bus tour of the mountains while in Queensland two years ago ( we go up there most winters for a month ) most of huge creepy crawlies are sleeping then .
The bus driver told us during our trip most Qld homes have at least one python snake living in their ceilings ...omg that makes my hands seat just typing the words
 
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Kadee46 said:
I’m the same way about MICE @Butterfly I can’t stand them ,and I live in a cereal growing area ( in Aust ) where we get plagues of them from time to time

@Gaer allot of children / adults who live in the tropical part of Australia ( Queensland ) walk around ,go to school with no shoes on ...AND they have some of the biggest creepiest things in Australia.

like huge spiders / snakes / cain toads to name a few , If visiting Australia ever crossed your mind @Gary I’d cross Queensland off your list right now .:eek::eek:

I live in South Aust where we have one of the deadliest snakes in the world living ,the largest one I’ve seen was about 8 foot thank goodness we rarely see them
https://www.environment.sa.gov.au/topics/plants-and-animals/Living_with_wildlife/Snakes

We went on a bus tour of the mountains while in Queensland two years ago ( we go up there most winters for a month ) most of huge creepy crawlies are sleeping then .
The bus driver told us during our trip most Qld homes have at least one python snake living in their ceilings ...omg that makes my hands seat just typing the words
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Mice don't really scare me, but I HATE 'em. I hate it when they get in the house and try to get into food and poop all over. But they don't cause that deep-in-the-gut terror that I feel about spiders.
 

Some fears are rational and some are irrational. I have experienced rational fears several times: like coming in for a landing at the SeaTac airport when the crosswinds are tossing the plane around like a ping pong ball in a hurricane. Or landing on a rolling destroyer in a rolling helicopter in heavy seas. Or going into surgery. Or …. Rational fears make sense.

Irrational fears are another matter, and I don't seem to be overly troubled by them very much. Part of that might be that I tend to act quickly and aggressively when my family or I are threatened. I don't even stop to think or worry.
 
Kadee46 said:
I’m the same way about MICE @Butterfly I can’t stand them ,and I live in a cereal growing area ( in Aust ) where we get plagues of them from time to time

@Gaer allot of children / adults who live in the tropical part of Australia ( Queensland ) walk around ,go to school with no shoes on ...AND they have some of the biggest creepiest things in Australia.

like huge spiders / snakes / cain toads to name a few , If visiting Australia ever crossed your mind @Gary I’d cross Queensland off your list right now .:eek::eek:

I live in South Aust where we have one of the deadliest snakes in the world living ,the largest one I’ve seen was about 8 foot thank goodness we rarely see them
https://www.environment.sa.gov.au/topics/plants-and-animals/Living_with_wildlife/Snakes

We went on a bus tour of the mountains while in Queensland two years ago ( we go up there most winters for a month ) most of huge creepy crawlies are sleeping then .
The bus driver told us during our trip most Qld homes have at least one python snake living in their ceilings ...omg that makes my hands seat just typing the words
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You do know that pythons are not venomous? And people are not their favorite food....
 
After my husband died, I developed an irrational fear of falling. I could not stand on a small stepstool to change a light. I went down steps like a 95-year-old woman. There was about a 3-inch step down into my garage and when I went out to do the laundry, I had to put both of my hands on the wall before I'd step down.

Then, after a couple of months, one day the fear was gone <SNAP> just like that!

Other than that, I'm an adrenalin-junkie and no fear/no adrenalin.
 
Pecos said:
Some fears are rational and some are irrational. I have experienced rational fears several times: like coming in for a landing at the SeaTac airport when the crosswinds are tossing the plane around like a ping pong ball in a hurricane. Or landing on a rolling destroyer in a rolling helicopter in heavy seas. Or going into surgery. Or …. Rational fears make sense.

Irrational fears are another matter, and I don't seem to be overly troubled by them very much. Part of that might be that I tend to act quickly and aggressively when my family or I are threatened. I don't even stop to think or worry.
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Truthfully, I never liked flying into SeaTac in any kind of weather. I would rather land blindfolded into San Francisco.
 
Do I get scared... hmmm... I startle too easily, but attribute this to my level of deep concentration and a history of multiple traumatic events. After the momentary jumping, once I realize what caused it, nothing really scares me - I might worry or get angry, but scared, not so much. Although, there have been times when 'scared' would have been a more appropriate response.
 
Em in Ohio said:
Do I get scared... hmmm... I startle too easily, but attribute this to my level of deep concentration and a history of multiple traumatic events. After the momentary jumping, once I realize what caused it, nothing really scares me - I might worry or get angry, but scared, not so much. Although, there have been times when 'scared' would have been a more appropriate response.
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I startle very easily also. So much so that my reaction often scare others around me since I screech really loud. It’s quite embarrassing but something I have zero control over. Like you, once the initial startle is over I’m fine.

The only thing I’m afraid of are ‘crowds of people too close to me.’
 
Keesha said:
I startle very easily also. So much so that my reaction often scare others around me since I screech really loud. It’s quite embarrassing but something I have zero control over. Like you, once the initial startle is over I’m fine.
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I have had people actually get angry with me - they blame me for 'over-reacting.' Like you, I have no control over it. If I did, I wouldn't be this way!
 
Em in Ohio said:
I have had people actually get angry with me - they blame me for 'over-reacting.' Like you, I have no control over it. If I did, I wouldn't be this way!
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Really? That’s sad. I’ve never had anyone get angry with me. They are usually far more considerate than that. Most of my screams are things like lawn mowers backfiring or a staple gun or air compressor motor suddenly going off or being suddenly startled by someone who I didn’t know was there. Most people are more surprised by my squeals than angry.

Years ago while I walked our dogs on our country road , there was a neighbour who lived down the road who used to jog and I’d often squeal because I’d never hear her approaching me from behind. Once she realized I squealed she’d announce she was approaching. We’d laugh 😂 and she’d move on.

Like you said, if I could control it, I would.
It’s like a sneeze. It just happens.
 
I live in the Clear Lake area of Houston. We have had some car break ins here at the complex. It has always been cars left unlocked. No break ins of cars that are locked. The office keeps telling folks in the bulletins to lock their cars. I thought everybody locked their cars.
To me its like locking my house doors. Always done it and taught my kids to do the same!
 
Keesha said:
Really? That’s sad. I’ve never had anyone get angry with me. They are usually far more considerate than that. Most of my screams are things like lawn mowers backfiring or a staple gun or air compressor motor suddenly going off or being suddenly startled by someone who I didn’t know was there. Most people are more surprised by my squeals than angry.

Years ago while I walked our dogs on our country road , there was a neighbour who lived down the road who used to jog and I’d often squeal because I’d never hear her approaching me from behind. Once she realized I squealed she’d announce she was approaching. We’d laugh 😂 and she’d move on.

Like you said, if I could control it, I would.
It’s like a sneeze. It just happens.
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Actually, I just Googled startle response in adults: https://www.lighterbrighteryou.life/latestnews/2017/6/21/magnesium
Despite the name of the website, the information is very interesting. I may get a magnesium supplement and give it a try. I jump when the phone rings and when people appear suddenly. Like you, I've tried training neighbors to make noise and approach facing me. Once upon a time, I had a coworker who would sneak up and poke me in the back rib cage, thinking it was funny to see me jump and squeal. It wasn't funny. The angry people were usually driving me - I would startle badly from the noise of something hitting the car or their phone ringing, jump and yelp - and be chastised severely. It is embarrassing.
 
Sunny said:
I'm curious, C'est Moi. Who are the outsiders?

I've only been to Austin once, for my granddaughter's wedding, stayed there for the weekend. I liked it, but interestingly, I felt like I was in
California rather than Texas! Though I did buy a cowboy hat while I was there.
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As @treeguy64 said, the massive influx of folks from all over the place (and yes, including a lot of Californians) has really changed the vibe of Austin. Of course, it's also happening to the rest of Texas, especially the large metro areas including Houston.
 
Em in Ohio said:
Actually, I just Googled startle response in adults: https://www.lighterbrighteryou.life/latestnews/2017/6/21/magnesium
Despite the name of the website, the information is very interesting. I may get a magnesium supplement and give it a try. I jump when the phone rings and when people appear suddenly. Like you, I've tried training neighbors to make noise and approach facing me. Once upon a time, I had a coworker who would sneak up and poke me in the back rib cage, thinking it was funny to see me jump and squeal. It wasn't funny. The angry people were usually driving me - I would startle badly from the noise of something hitting the car or their phone ringing, jump and yelp - and be chastised severely. It is embarrassing.
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My man used to think it was funny too. Not so much now . 😌 I fixed him. 😇
Magnesium helps relax my nerves but it doesn’t stop me from me from becoming overly startled or jumping or squealing for that matter.
 

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