Do You Let Others Affect Your Mood, or Are You Able to "Consider the Source"?

[SeaBreeze]

Do you let those around you affect your mood in a negative way? Whether it's a spouse/partner, co-worker, neighbor or friend, are you affected by toxic personalities, or people who may be considered as emotional "vampires"...sucking all good feelings from you and draining you of your positive attitude and mood.

I found this to be true especially in the workplace. There were some who started out their days on a negative tone, and ultimately dragged down the good moods of all around them. Even if I know somebody is like this, it's hard to not be badly affected by their presence and complaining or angry/hateful conversations.

Do you let others affect your mood in a negative way? Did you ever find that someone who succeeded in dragging you down, went on their merry way and shortly engaged in laughter, while your day suddenly has a gray cloud overhead?

I guess some people who are more sensitive, empathetic or sympathetic to others may be more affected by this, as opposed to the folks who ignore others and couldn't care less about what they were griping about.

Your thoughts?

 

[Butterfly]

I've known my share of emotional vampires, especially in the workplace. A boss who's a vampire can ruin everyone's whole day-- my last boss was the quintessential emotional vampire

 

[fureverywhere]

I'm already a swirling, sucking bundle of moods...but I've developed a Kevlar shell...better not go poking my moods, they're mine dangnabit!

 

[SifuPhil]

I've known my share of energy vampires - I usually just put up "fences" to protect myself. It's much harder when they're close family or friends.

 

[tnthomas]

Mood is contagious, and can go either + or -, but unfortunately it seems that the negative force is difficult to counteract. You can always throw up a firewall around yourself, but truly toxic(bosses, coworkers) people are hard to influence positively.

 

[Karen99]

I always consider the source..cause that's everything...and I just stay away from toxic people..whenever possible.

 

[fureverywhere]

My Dad, I've learned to change the subject and keep things very short...he's gotten negative to the extreme...think it's the meds.

 

[Cookie]

Considering the source is a good tactic --- so many aged (and not so aged) individuals seem to have communication difficulties and personal issues and like take them out on others, which can be quite annoying. I've learned to keep things short and simple and let them have lots of space, i.e. stay away from them if possible.

 

[jnos]

What a perfect topic for me today! Thanks for posting it, Seabreeze. I have to think more before I post. (It's complicated--at least, in my little mind, it is.) Will be back.nthego:

 

[FazeFour]

Seabreeze said; I guess some people who are more sensitive, empathetic or sympathetic to others may be more affected by this, as opposed to the folks who ignore others and couldn't care less about what they were griping about.

I am the latter. It's probably why I have only two friends. Only two is ok with me, but I do sometimes wish I was more sympathetic and patient. It surprises people who know me when I go out of my way to do something nice for someone in need. Like when I stopped at a Dairy Queen and saw a guy just outside the parking lot, crying. He said he was hungry, and I remembered they had a special on hot dogs. So I went back in and got him a couple of dogs and a soft drink. Several times I've taken cardboard sign people to my place to help me with my yard-work, and fed them and paid them. And not one of them has come back to rob me or any such thing.

So, I have compassion, just no sympathy for whiners, complainers, and the emotionally needy. I've met and worked with people like that, and I grew up with a bunch of them (probably why I'm thick-skinned about it). I simply don't waste my time on them.

 

[Laurie]

Good Heavens, yes.

When I was still in the military if I was feeling liverish in the morning I would find some unfortunate subordinate to savage and that would set me up for the whole day!

I used to warn my own people to keep out of my way, but to be fair, they had this uncanny knack of sensing it while I was still fifty yards away!

 

[Ameriscot]

I've known many energy vampires as well. But I'm doing better at dealing with them now. I can absorb others moods but try to only take on the good mood, not the bad.

 

[oohjarwatsit]

I am not particularly sensitive to the mood of other people and don't let it get to me if it is negative.

 

[Jackie22]

Whatever makes you feel bad, leave it......whatever makes you feel good, keep it.

 

[Arachne]

I am very empathetic and often take on ones negative energy. I suffer from Bipolar depression and perhaps am more sensitive to those around me. I use meditation and visualization to combat the vampires. It take's time to master the skill but I have managed. So the song.. Don't Bring me Down

'You got me runnin' goin' out of my mind,
You got me thinkin' that I'm wastin' my time.
Don't bring me down, no no no no no,
I'll tell you once more before I get off the floor
Don't bring me down.'

By ELO is my mantra..

 

[BlunderWoman]

I would like to lie and say i'm unaffected by toxic people, but it isn't true. I'm like a freaking sponge. I don't like that about me

 

[Debby]

I've known my share of energy vampires - I usually just put up "fences" to protect myself. It's much harder when they're close family or friends.

I like that phrase 'energy vampires'. And you're right Phil, it is harder when those energy vampires are family or really close friends. My mom is an energy vampire for both myself and my youngest daughter. We both have to 'gird our loins' and prepare with a week of fasting and prayer prior to making 'that' phone call and then when it's done, we both seem to need a day of recovery. And it's not like we aren't all trying real hard to get along but it's like my mom is 'oil' to our 'water'. Not too surprising I guess because this daughter is the most like me in temperament.