Envy and jealousy. What are some triggers?

Personally, I don't understand envy, nor jealousy.

I was once befriended by a woman who had a lovely husband, who held a good job. Her son (age 5), and daughter (age 8) were both smart. Rather than appreciating what she had, she exhibited jealousy when we took our daughter to the theatre. When we were out for coffee, she would pinpoint people, and making insulting remarks about them.

It was at that point, that I decided to extricate myself from the friendship.

Life is too short to be around that kind of negativity.
 
I think the root cause of both is low self esteem. When a person wants but knows he can't get/have what another has then he begins to feel inadequate and also powerless. Becoming angry at the one who has what he wants, he will begin to act out...or suffer in silence.

People will actually kill over these 2 emotions.
 
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Della said:
Our culture seems to foster jealousy with its beauty pageants and competitive sports from a very young age.
I have trouble watching the Olympics because I hate seeing those young hearts break if they lose, after giving so much of their young lives to the sport.
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I love going to Special Needs Olympics better. My 2 grandsons with special needs have participated
for years. The younger one got so distracted by the cheering crowd he forgot to run his race and just
walked back and forth waving at the crowd smiling soooo big. The adults participating in the games
made him a make shift trophy from a cup and a stick with some ribbons after the race and gathered round him.
Talk about melt your heart, tears were flowing.
 
dusty said:
I think the root cause of both is low self esteem. When a person wants but knows he can't get/have what another has then he begins to feel inadequate and also powerless. Becoming angry at the one who has what he wants, he will begin to act out...or suffer in silence.

People will actually kill over these 2 emotions.
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I agree that low self esteem is the basis for both of these emotions. I was taught not to envy but to learn what made others successful and to seek those qualities myself. Jealousy? Well I'm just not.
 
I remember having those feelings a very long time ago. I was very young, just starting out on my own with no help from anyone, at odds with my parents, and finances were a real struggle.

After paying the rent and putting gas in the car, I was lucky to have $5.00 left over for food. I looked at other people and felt insecure, and yes - - - jealous. When the money situation got better, I got past those thoughts, but I hope to never be in that position again.
 
Envy and jealousy are considered deeply destructive, that, when left unchecked,can destroy personal relationships, mental well-being, and community. While often used interchangeably, they are distinct: jealousy is the fear of losing what one has, while envy is the resentment of anotherā€™s good fortune and the desire to possess it or destroy it. At their extreme, they are the emotions that are known to lead to murder, hatred and conflict,
 
This is how I feel about things^^^^^^

I actually kind of feel sorry for those people that feel the need to deliberately try to piss you off by flirting with your man (Babs2u), or speaking poorly of your own good friends to others. (i have a bestie that does this about our other bestie)

I don't know if it's envy or jealousy, but this person is blessed in her own right, and I see no need for her trashing of her friend behind her back. I refuse to listen to her or engage her. I've seen this a lot in my years growing up, and I just prefer to mind my own business sometimes and travel solo.
 
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