Fathoming the Female Brain.

fuzzybuddy

fuzzybuddy

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Location
The Sticks, Northeast PA.
I had a small medical problem, so I had to see my Doc at his other office. That's the office I've never been to. His female office staff said, " Turn right at the stop sign on Snow Street". I got to Snow Street and turned right at the first stop sign. It was a tiny dead end street-no doc's office. At the FOURTH Stop sign on Snow Street, I saw my Doc's office sign on the right. When I asked the female office mgr. about the directions, she said, " You DID turn right at the stop sign, didn't you?" I had to admit I did. I believe most women are terrible directions givers, but they have superb legalistic minds.
I have now left for undisclosed shelter.
 

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Ha-ha-ha, you wouldn't want to take directions from me either! I have no sense of direction. It does seem men are better however some aren't and I know some women that get around quite well.
 
I'm lousy at directions -- partly because I can never remember the names of streets. If I were giving those directions, I'd have had to say turn right at the Texaco station, or some such. I've lived here forever, and don't know the names of many streets in my own neighborhood --- though I know the area like the back of my hand.
 

I'm no good at directions either. If I am driving and the hubby is with me,which is rare because he hates the way I drive,I always ask him,which way?right or left and that's at the end of our driveway.
 
Most people don't seem to realize that what they say is not understood correctly by others. I don't short-circuit on giving directions. And I'm female, last I checked. I think we've been taught that we aren't good at it. A lot of men I know are no good at it either. A little more to the left doesn't always translate. Grin.
 
Phoenix said:
Most people don't seem to realize that what they say is not understood correctly by others. I don't short-circuit on giving directions. And I'm female, last I checked. I think we've been taught that we aren't good at it. A lot of men I know are no good at it either. A little more to the left doesn't always translate. Grin.
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I don't remember being "taught" I am just not good with directions. I knew this from when I began driving. Busy intersections are nerve wracking for me, in fact, I don't enjoy driving. Hubby used to do it all and I gladly let him. What I can do is read a map and help navigate on long road trips. Of course, people don't use them anymore.
 
Well I'm very good at giving directions which is why my husband always hands me the phone to help out someone who's looking for our house. I also like driving when I'm alone and I can understand maps which my husband is also very bad at.
 
I have a bad sense of direction too, but if I'm asked directions and I don't know an exact easy way to tell the person, I'll just say sorry and won't give bad directions. My husband on the other hand has an excellent sense of direction both while driving in the city or on the highways, or walking in the woods. But I have to agree with Phoenix, to be fair, I've gotten bad directions on more than one occasion over the years from men....so our abilities are not determined by our sex.
 
There are a lot of things that boomer women were told when we were young. One of them was that whatever it was, men did it better. Time and again we have demonstrated that this is not the case. But because of all the sexism, a lot of us did not have the chance to explore who we could be to our highest potential, hence the world is a lesser place. Testosterone has ruled too long. We need balance in all things.
 
Phoenix said:
There are a lot of things that boomer women were told when we were young. One of them was that whatever it was, men did it better. Time and again we have demonstrated that this is not the case. But because of all the sexism, a lot of us did not have the chance to explore who we could be to our highest potential, hence the world is a lesser place. Testosterone has ruled too long. We need balance in all things.
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You're right, Phoenix. I don't think I was so much "told" that men did certain things better, but there was a sometimes subtle, sometimes not so subtle, suggestion that that was true. Things such as math, science, and cars are examples of this.
 
Yes, a lot of the messages were subtle. Some were blatant. I was good at math. Thankfully no on discouraged me there. In college I was told it would be best not to pursue the science required for me to go to med school, because I was female. I was thinking of a counseling career, so I decide to go at it from a different direction. In a job interview for working for a financial institution, I was told I wasn't hired because I was female. These days I would have gone to the Civil Liberties Union, but back then....
 
Phoenix said:
There are a lot of things that boomer women were told when we were young. One of them was that whatever it was, men did it better. Time and again we have demonstrated that this is not the case. But because of all the sexism, a lot of us did not have the chance to explore who we could be to our highest potential, hence the world is a lesser place. Testosterone has ruled too long. We need balance in all things.
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My mother never drove a car.. My father always said it was because she could not use her hands and her feet at the same time.. and SHE actually agreed with him. I never understood that.. Did she actually feel she was incapable, or was it just easier to be driven everywhere,.

I also just recently had a conversation with a man I graduated from High School with.. The conversation led to him bringing up a guidance counselor's name.. I had to tell him that I never had seen a guidance counselor in HS.. Girls were seldom counseled about college or careers. We really never questioned it. So many of us went along with the program... I really glad to see women standing up against that stereotypical image.
 
A lot of the women in my family didn't drive because their husbands were that controlling. I didn't start college until I was twenty four. I was raised it was a sin to have a job. I married at eighteen. My ex told me that he was "God in our house." I was raised that divorce was a sin, and that if a woman moved out from under a man's umbrella she would not be able to make it. It took a lot of courage and financial aid to get me out of that mess. I dumped the husband about a year after I started college.
 
Phoenix said:
A lot of the women in my family didn't drive because their husbands were that controlling. I didn't start college until I was twenty four. I was raised it was a sin to have a job. I married at eighteen. My ex told me that he was "God in our house." I was raised that divorce was a sin, and that if a woman moved out from under a man's umbrella she would not be able to make it. It took a lot of courage and financial aid to get me out of that mess. I dumped the husband about a year after I started college.
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My story is similar. I didn't drive until I was 25.. I went to college one class at a time in the evenings. Hubby resented having to watch the kids on that one evening a week and I would come home to them unbathed and sleeping on the living room floor. Dumped him too at age 27.. and raised my kids and eventually finished my degree.
 
There's other things about the way women have a legalistic mind. Picture a crowded two lane road. MR. Jones comes out of a store and wants to get back onto that very crowded road. If he sees a small break in the traffic, he screeches out into traffic and speeds up to get to the same speed everybody else is. MISS Jones comes out of a store and wants to get back onto that very crowded road. If she sees a small break in the traffic, she pulls out into traffic , but slowly she speeds to get to the same speed others are going. Both could have caused a terrible accident by pulling out into heavy traffic. But once in traffic, men would have stomped on the gas to keep up. But once in traffic, women would slowly speed up, because in their minds, the driver behind her should be able to slow down. There's that legalistic thinking. Again, both are horribly wrong.
 
No opinions about driving, but I do think that in general, women have a much worse sense of direction than men. I do think it's gender-related. I would be lost half the time without the GPS in my car, and I even have a walking GPS that I occasionally use! If I'm visiting somebody in an apartment house, when I leave the apartment, I invariably head the wrong way for the elevator. At shopping malls, I've learned to memorize details about where I left my car, otherwise I'm in for a lot of searching. I even have to memorize which entrance I came in, especially in the bigger malls. Many women have told me they also have this problem. My late husband never did, and I relied on him a lot for directions.
 
I wouldn't generalize gender at all. It's just a different side of the brain I believe. I've gotten directions from police " Take the interstate three quarters of a mile to Webster. Go North on Webster a mile and a half until you reach the four way and bear to the left. Follow along the parkway to the end and that will be the low numbers on Morris Avenue". A version for those of us who rely on landmarks and don't know North and South...

Go down the main road past Target, the new one, not the old one...the one next to Whole Foods yeah. Then make a small turn by the Italian place and follow that around. When you see that stop sign that's bent that's your first right. The BP station is the second. Ignore the flashing light, you want the one at the BP station. Then get in the middle lane and in two blocks you're on Morris.

You end up the same place, just a different way to describe it.
 
Gender has nothing to do with it. We can each make points using ourselves or someone we know as examples, and come to opposite conclusions. While nature dictates somethings, like the ability to give birth, this is not one of such example.
 
Call me some kind of horrible person, but I believe there are significant gender qualities. Feeling another person growing inside you is something men will never know. We are physically different. Our brains are physically different. Does that mean either men or women are superior? No. I believe those are subjective assumptions, which aren't born out by biology.
 
It has nothing to do with being horrible. It's your opinion. As adults we allow for differences in opinion. I have never known what it's like to have a baby growing inside me either. I'm female. I didn't want to have a baby. The world is overpopulated. I listened to the Zero Population Growth people. We need to not generalize. It has nothing to do with superiority. We are individually different despite testoterone and estrogen and the sexual characteristics. Socially speaking there's a big difference. We are endoctrinated into the male and the female cultures. We make real progress when we choose what's right for us, regardless of our plumbing and what we've been taught.
 
Phoenix said:
It has nothing to do with being horrible. It's your opinion. As adults we allow for differences in opinion. I have never known what it's like to have a baby growing inside me either. I'm female. I didn't want to have a baby. The world is overpopulated. I listened to the Zero Population Growth people. We need to not generalize. It has nothing to do with superiority. We are individually different despite testoterone and estrogen and the sexual characteristics. Socially speaking there's a big difference. We are endoctrinated into the male and the female cultures. We make real progress when we choose what's right for us, regardless of our plumbing and what we've been taught.
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Phoenix, I believe you are absolutely right.
 
When I was in the Navy for 4 years. I worked with guys. When I got out, I got my RN. And I worked with primarily women. You can call it genetics, social training or whatever; there is a huge difference working with primarily men or primarily women.
 

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